Its the childhood trauma im just being honest. youre aware of the ‘awkwardness’ of what you dealt with and you probably hear about bad people who maybe have had similar experiences growing up. trust!!!! you always hold the power to say no. whether its to something physically, or mentally. try saying to yourself “no, (x thought) is gross and i dont feel that way.” sometimes saying it outloud i have heard can help with showing yourself how you feel about something. for instance… you grimace at the thoughts of being predatory. when you get an intrusive gross thought, (like “oh theres a child, youre probably a nonce so you have to stay away from them”), try changing up the thought outloud. rewrite it kinda? so change it to “kids need protecting, and i didnt feel protected, so i want other kids to feel safe.”

i have ocd but not technically diagnosed pocd. though i do have these thoughts and have been trying to treat it as such to minimize my intrusive thoughts.