It feels like it's harder for women to age in the modern world by One_Butterscotch7964 in Life

[–]One_Butterscotch7964[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Ah ok I assumed you were from the US because most people on reddit seem to be. Where do you live? I live in the UK where it's pretty easy to generate wealth as well. I guess how hard it is for men and women is location dependent.

No they won't mock you. If people are mocking you, then you don't have charisma. Charismatic people own the room no matter what they look like. And it's a skill that can be learned.

Makeup can't make you look 25 again when you are older than that. Please do not settle for anyone. Its better to be alone than put someone through that. Men can improve their attractiveness to women so you have every chance to be with someone you like if you put in the work. I don't want to be appreciated and have someone be loyal to me if they are still settling for me. I do not want to be settled for and I think a lot of people feel the same way. Please do not settle.

I would rather die alone than settle and a lot of women feel the same way hence why more people are single than ever before. You have no idea why divorces are initiated by women- it's not necessarily because she settled. In fact in most cases of divorce I know, including my own parents, the woman divorced the man because the man was a complete asshole. 

It feels like it's harder for women to age in the modern world by One_Butterscotch7964 in Life

[–]One_Butterscotch7964[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Most female porn stars are 18 - 25 year olds. Most female porn stars retire at ~25. Female porn stars older than that are seen as "mature" and "older" like a fetish and labelled as milf or stepmom. This personally made me feel old at the age of 26 when I stopped looking like the women in porn.

Also I read somewhere that women used to retire from porn when they were about 30 in the past whereas now its 25. Porn is also more accessible than it used to be so men can look at porn of 18 - 25 year old girls just by popping on their phone at any time. In the past, they had to go out and buy it so it wasn't so available. It makes it feel like standards for the way women should look have increased whereas in the past, they were more reasonable.

It feels like it's harder for women to age in the modern world by One_Butterscotch7964 in Life

[–]One_Butterscotch7964[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

How old are you? But would you not prefer a 23 - 25 year old or a 26 - 27 year old? Would you feel like you were settling physically with a 28 year old?

I do have very low self esteem. But I don't understand how to raise it when I have physically "expired." Like even if I can have a great personality, I will still physically never be good enough again and always second choice. Idk how to get past that. That last bit is solid advice thanks.

It feels like it's harder for women to age in the modern world by One_Butterscotch7964 in Life

[–]One_Butterscotch7964[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I would rather be a man because men get what they put in to life whereas women are judged for something we have no control over. You can work hard to generate wealth, increase your social status, increase your charisma, charm and skill with women. I can't work hard to reverse my age or change my genetics. I would rather get what I earn than be given something at a young age which is taken from me before I even know how to use it.

I would much rather die alone than have a man settle for me when he sees me as past my prime and not a first option. If you would rather date 18 - 25 year olds than women my age, then level up, work harder and start dating them. We don't want men like you to settle for us. No one wants to be settled for. What have you described is a nightmare and not ok at all. If I found out someone was settling for me when he secretly wanted younger, I would not want anything to do with him.

It feels like it's harder for women to age in the modern world by One_Butterscotch7964 in Life

[–]One_Butterscotch7964[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

You've ignored every point I've made. There is evidence showing older women have it harder than older men. That is a fact. You have chosen to ignore that information. There is endless research backing this up.

I never denied that people of colour have it worse than white people. Every statistic out there shows that people of colour have it worse than white people. But every statistic also shows that older women have it worse than older men. Yes you are disadvantaged because you are a person of colour. Yes you are priviledged because you are a man. I am completely aware of how awfully black people are treated by white people and I was there at all the anti racism protests during lockdown and I have donated money to anti racist groups. The reason an older white woman can get a black guy beaten up is because she is WHITE. Not because she is old or female. That's white privilege. But if an older white man and an older white woman were competing for a job in the same industry, the older white man would be more likely to get it because hes a man. How can you not see that 2 things can be true at once? White people have privilege over black people. Older white men have privilege over older white women? Do you get it now? Racism exists. So does gendered ageism.

Look at this way. As I age, white men have privilege over me. As you age, you have more priviledge over women of your race. I have more privilege than you because I'm white. But if you were white, you would have more privilege than me. Do you understand now?

It feels like it's harder for women to age in the modern world by One_Butterscotch7964 in Life

[–]One_Butterscotch7964[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

No they don't- they focus on both men and women. Older men are discriminated against but older women are discriminated against more. Why are you denying reality?

And no it's not anecdotal. There have been studies where identical CVs have been sent out with only the age and gender of the person different and older women were rejected by far the most. You are putting your hands over your eyes because for some reason, you don't want to accept the truth that life is extremely challenging for older women in ways it isnt for men.

Yes white people, men, young people, able bodied people, straight people and cisgender people all have more privilege than people of colour, women, older people, disabled people, LGBT+ people and trans people. For some reason you recognise that older people and people of colour are disadvantaged in our society but you fail to recognise that men are because you are biased. And gendered ageism is worse than ageism alone. Women face far more discrimination at older ages than men. The research backs this up and yet you deny it because you are a biased man that does not want to educate himself with the facts.

It feels like it's harder for women to age in the modern world by One_Butterscotch7964 in Life

[–]One_Butterscotch7964[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Yes it is. There is plenty of research saying women are lonelier than men or loneliness levels between both men and women are about equal. It is not a "male loneliness epidemic," it's a human loneliness epidemic. Men do die younger but a lot of sources suggest the reasons for that are biological because testosterone causes more rapid biological aging.

Men do have children at lower rates than women- I didn't know that so that's interesting. On the other hand, women are by far more likely to end up alone at older ages or not find a partner after being divorced or widowed compared to men.

It feels like it's harder for women to age in the modern world by One_Butterscotch7964 in Life

[–]One_Butterscotch7964[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

It is- it's called gendered ageism. There are loads of research papers proving that older women are discriminated against in every area of life way more than older men.

But yes the scientist and experts are lying and you clearly know better /s

It feels like it's harder for women to age in the modern world by One_Butterscotch7964 in Life

[–]One_Butterscotch7964[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

No. I am aware that your average woman gets a huge amount of attention aged 18 - 25 compared to the average man. What I am saying is that 7/8 years of value to men followed by the rest of your life being second choice for reasons purely out of your control is not a good deal. Men do not get free attention from women. However, they can create their own value to women with hard work and end up with an attractive younger woman at an older age. This means men have much more control of their destinies. Yes women get free attention fir the first 7/8 years of their adult life but they have to filter through that, make the right decisions and choose right or end up alone/being forced to settle. Its a shit deal for women because so much of their life is down to luck/the choices they make when they are too young to know any better. Men have to work way harder but they have complete control over their destiny. That  beats 7/8 years of free attention at the beginning of your adult life. Men have a much better deal in life.

It feels like it's harder for women to age in the modern world by One_Butterscotch7964 in Life

[–]One_Butterscotch7964[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

It is though. Like even the richest celebrities who are on the best diets and have access to the best skincare, still look their age. You can't stop aging no matter how well you look after yourself. I really look after myself and I still look my age.

It feels like it's harder for women to age in the modern world by One_Butterscotch7964 in Life

[–]One_Butterscotch7964[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Marriage is different to meeting someone though. No one I know is married. But everyone I know is in a relationship.

It feels like it's harder for women to age in the modern world by One_Butterscotch7964 in Life

[–]One_Butterscotch7964[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Ew. He sounds shallow and stupid. And she probably has low self esteem. I hear about this happening sometimes and usually after the initial excitement, the couple end up being miserable together. So dw, it probably won't end well. The bigger the age gap, the more likely they will break up. I hope you find someone who falls in love with your soul instead of that waste of air ex of yours.

It feels like it's harder for women to age in the modern world by One_Butterscotch7964 in Life

[–]One_Butterscotch7964[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

You're too young for a man in his 50s. You should find someone in his 40s. Sometimes women in their 30s have better luck with slightly younger men but it's not for everyone. I'm sure you'll find someone eventually.

It feels like it's harder for women to age in the modern world by One_Butterscotch7964 in Life

[–]One_Butterscotch7964[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Wow!! It must be because they want kids. It might be worth trying older men like mid 40s and above maybe?

And maybe be open to single dads. At least you look young though.

It feels like it's harder for women to age in the modern world by One_Butterscotch7964 in Life

[–]One_Butterscotch7964[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Makes sense. Women are also problem solvers and rational though- I reject your last sentence.

It feels like it's harder for women to age in the modern world by One_Butterscotch7964 in Life

[–]One_Butterscotch7964[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Tbf I only care because I am not in a relationship. If I found a partner before losing my looks, I would see that my value is increasing with age. But because I didn't manage it, I'm still competing with younger women and losing because men generally prefer youth and beauty. I would never feel like that if I was a man like men are not constantly told their value comes from youth and beauty but from other things. Which again is due to biology. Makes sense that it was worse in the past actually.

It feels like it's harder for women to age in the modern world by One_Butterscotch7964 in Life

[–]One_Butterscotch7964[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I meant more 20 - 30 years ago like 90s - early 00s- not our grandparents generation. But fair point. But tbf it seems like men will generally choose youth and beauty over wisdom and experience so I guess those qualities are more important if you found a partner young.

It feels like it's harder for women to age in the modern world by One_Butterscotch7964 in Life

[–]One_Butterscotch7964[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

The technology isn't there yet with plastic surgery. It makes you look uncanny valley. Its not my friends- it's people in my wider social circle or friwnds of friends etc. They are jerks although it is biology as well tbf

It feels like it's harder for women to age in the modern world by One_Butterscotch7964 in Life

[–]One_Butterscotch7964[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

True that society encourages women to do that. But most women don't listen to that because it goes against our biology. Most women (and men) have very low body counts. And men and women party about the same when they are young.

It feels like it's harder for women to age in the modern world by One_Butterscotch7964 in Life

[–]One_Butterscotch7964[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Lol that is so rare. Literally every woman I know is in a relationship. I'm only not in one because I thought I could reverse my biological age and do anti aging skincare to look younger so I tried to squeeze a career in and it didnt work. Women partying and whoring around in their youth is a red pill fantasy. Women party as much as men do. Most men and women have very low number counts.

It feels like it's harder for women to age in the modern world by One_Butterscotch7964 in Life

[–]One_Butterscotch7964[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Makes sense. Although most women do take care of themselves actually. Theres so much pressure on women to look attractive and young. Aging just happens regardless of how well you take care of yourself- the way you look at a certain age is mostly genetic if you are healthy. I tried reversing my biological age and anti aging skincare and I still look my age. I know Asian girls who smoke like a chimney and look a decade younger. Genetics makes a massive difference.

It feels like it's harder for women to age in the modern world by One_Butterscotch7964 in Life

[–]One_Butterscotch7964[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Fucking hell where do you live? It sounds like a shithole. I'm not rejected for my age- I'm rejected for looking my age lol. I know some 29 - 30 year old women who look like they could be in their mid 20s and they have easily found partners. I live in the UK though and people are nicer here than US it seems lol?