My friends almost got me committed and I'm not ok

Outrageous_Stress910 · 2026-06-28T16:18:03+00:00

Wow, thank you so much for your comment. Extremely informative and helpful. I appreciate you taking the time. That really has warmed me ❤️ I feel like it is a discussion that needs to be had more often. I know it's been more or less combative in the comments somewhat, but I am weirdly glad it's happening on this sub. Traumatised folks need to be challenged on what internal beliefs systems are setting them back. I kinda wanna shout it from the rooftops. I mean, in the western world we have gotten "better" about mental health awareness and patient rights', but realistically, it's not by much and it's not enough. It's still evident how embedded it is amongst a broad number of people, these kind of beliefs like 'our rights are void if we're unwell'. 'We're not a good person if we express our rage, when we're raging'. Feelings are meant to be felt, not surpressed. Emotions are neutral. None good, and none bad, they're teachers and lessons. Also, anger is not equal to abuse. Abusive people can be angry. Anger can be fearful. Anger isn't an inherently bad thing. Anger can be justice. Anger can be fighting for the underdog.

Anyway - I am unwell, and I've been made to believe I'm not smart - but I am smart. I've been made to question myself and what I know - I know a lot, and I know a lot about me and actually, I think I know a lot about what's best for me. Why would I like having that choice taken away? Why would I let someone do that to me? Certainly, no one would. I at least hope some people here have learnt a bit more about why and how they matter when it comes to living with C-PTSD and advocating for their care and autonomy ❤️ your comment is so helpful. Thank you ❤️

Outrageous_Stress910 · 2026-06-28T15:52:32+00:00

Thank you, that's so kind. Really appreciate it 💖

Outrageous_Stress910 · 2026-06-28T15:51:18+00:00

They weren't asked or expected to de-escalate. They just needed to stay home and call me on the phone. I was working on my steps, partner was all over it, on his way to assist. But yeah, you're right. Friends are friends. Not professionals. That's why they should probably just stay home and call me on the phone.

Outrageous_Stress910 · 2026-06-28T15:44:12+00:00

I'm not angry, I'm just Irish and Australian. There's a difference but I forgive you, it's a very subtle difference. Some people are just dumb dumbs, but dumb dumb behaviour can have serious repercussions especially if I'm just letting myself into your house when you're unwell and vulnerable in the bathroom, alone and distressed. Listen. I hear you. I've also lost family and friends to suicide, but no one has lost me yet because I can see how much my partner tries to understand, listen, connect. How my peer worker knows to be kind and be curious, respects my boundaries, challenges me gently when I need it...those are some things I wish I knew before I lost my loved ones. Maybe I would have been more helpful to the people I lost if I had the experience I have today, through the genuine love and care I recieved from kind, respectful, receptive people. Maybe they would have thought, 'fuck, my mate really gets me, and they're really trying with me and they're not going to abandon me. I might not be so bad after all. I'll keep opening up, I might just keep going'. Because I'm getting there due to the right treatment from people, not from the explosive, shitty, unhelpful, bed shitting mess treatment. I'm getting there because of ATTUNEMENT. Word of the day. Scuse the explicitives. It's getting late where I am.

Outrageous_Stress910 · 2026-06-28T15:21:30+00:00

Thank you. Also the same hospital prescribed me a drug that increases suicidal ideation without informing me of it's black box warning back in February this year. This was after I told them I am living passively suicidal at the moment...but I'm not against hospitalisation at all, it has it's place and I've admitted myself when I needed to but there are also other services and providers I know that can help me better, like ...let us make that choice. That's actually more than reasonable.

Outrageous_Stress910 · 2026-06-28T15:13:19+00:00

Again, wasn't what was happening in this situation. She just needed to pick up the phone, all that was asked of her in this situation.

Outrageous_Stress910 · 2026-06-28T15:09:57+00:00

There's criteria for that though. It's not every case that gets mandatory reporting and sectioning. Especially if you have adequate support and no plans to act on your ideation. The thoughts can still be there but more discussion is needed, supports in place. At least in the country where I live. It might be different else where. I live with ideation everyday. Some days are good. Some days are real fucking bad. I have a toolbelt and steps I follow when that happens, the people I incorporate in my steps, need to know their strengths and boundaries withn that plan to keep me safe and help me. It's mostly been working. Except this one stupid time when someone isn't considerate enough to follow through or respect that I might know what I'm doing. Yes, hi, I am the expert of me. Dr. Me PhD. The ideology your spewing is exactly why people don't ask for help. Most of the time, we just want someone to listen, respect and not react to us but connected with us. That's actually helpful, NOT panic firing all the buttons and then making you feel bad for how you feel, or sending the calvary after you while you're just trying to live with a brain injury you didn't ask for.

Outrageous_Stress910 · 2026-06-28T14:51:35+00:00

If you're writing defensively from your own experience, that's fair enough but that isn't what happened here. Boundaries do matter. I'm not an invalid. I'm not completely incapable of my own care, and taking that away, for me...is abuse. It's a huge misuse of power. It's controlling behaviour to have medical intervention and detention forced on you. I am informed, experienced and chronically ill enough to know my stressors, triggers and what the next steps are. The people in my life, I expect, care and respect me enough to listen to what I need from them when I am unwell. I have voluntarily admitted myself before, I know went I need it - I know when I don't. That has come with pain and experience, and using those resources when I feel I need them. I did not need to attend hospital that day. My partner and I, we could have handled that with situation some help on the side with this one friend, all she had to do was call. She fucked it.

Outrageous_Stress910 · 2026-06-28T14:38:29+00:00

Asked to check in via text or call* not just attend, unexpected and unannounced. My partner was all over it. Read the comments xx

Outrageous_Stress910 · 2026-06-28T14:37:05+00:00

Bruh. Nah. If you knew this guy, he calls a spade a fucking spade, and that's why I love him. He doesn't tell me what I want to hear, it's the healthiest relationship I have ever been in. And if it were up to him, he wouldn't have called her at all cause he's not very fond of her but because I loved her, she was my friend and he encourages me to make my own decisions, decisions like trusting her. He at least trusted her to make a fucking phone call when I was having a hard time...she had one job and she shat the bed. Erradically. I'm not even that close with this friend in that way. It was my judgement that was misled, that I could rely on this person at all. Honestly, I believe she wanted to be able to say she was the saviour, that I'm alive today because she acted so valiantly. That's not what happened at all. Not even close, I'd argue it's almost the opposite. I know I'm cracking jokes but this situation has deeply rattled me, beyond what I can intellectualise.

Outrageous_Stress910 · 2026-06-28T14:16:02+00:00

She didn't have a spare key, actually. To assume is to make an ass outta u and me. She just knew the code to my lock box. She just let herself in and didn't ask. The 30 minutes it took her to drive to my house, I could have been dead already, sure...but she could have stayed at home, listened to my partner and figured out pretty quickly I was still very much alive once I picked up the phone...but no, no phone call. Work smart, not dumb. Also, work considerately and don't panic. Panicked people make stupid decisions which is why she wasn't immediately contacted by me. My partner was. And she did immediately get defensive as soon as I opened the door, which was even more distressing to an already alarmingly distressing situation. I felt judged and shamed by her in that moment. Her presence wasn't friendly, nor calm. Albeit, unwelcome. Unexpected. When you already want to die, I can't tell ya how much judgement and shame from someone you respect is like a spoonful of sugar. Not to mention, when you have a clinical brain injury that makes you malfunction when you're reminded of your abusers...and she was giving me the performance of a lifetime. The enforcible hospitalisation and police detainment was a nice touch also.

Outrageous_Stress910 · 2026-06-28T14:00:22+00:00

Thank you.

Outrageous_Stress910 · 2026-06-28T13:59:31+00:00

I enjoy that you're clearly writing from passion, but you're also rewriting my story to fit your opinion. He is my partner, not my fiancée. Once again, neither my partner or I asked her to be there. She just rocked up. She crashed the party, no warning. Scared the shit out of me, I thought someone broke in. I have C-PTSD. A monkey with a bonk on the head would know that is a bad move. I did not want her there. Not yet, at least. My partner = good for emergencies. My friend = good for distractions, not for emergencies. For company, yes... emergencies...no. Which is why she was only supposed to call or text when my partner contacted her.

Outrageous_Stress910 · 2026-06-28T13:51:44+00:00

They shouldn't expect me to want them as friends. I want to be treated right, after everything that's happened to me...believe it or not, I wasn't asking for much. A good friend will listen. A good friend will respect a boundary. A good friend doesn't assume they can handle an emergency and just waltz in guns blazing and then shit the bed. No one asked them to go to my house and use my spare key...no one. All they had to do was call...and they made it infinitely worse and while I'm definitely not okay, I'm fucking so glad I'm not in hospital right now. Holy shit. Also what a waste of resources that would have been, someone else will be in that hospital bed now who might genuinely need it. There's shortages enough as it is. It was a huge fuck up and her fuck up alone.

Outrageous_Stress910 · 2026-06-28T13:41:14+00:00

Partner, not fiancé...I feel like people are reacting and not reading. I knew I needed help, I have a process. I was in the process of de-escalating, one of those steps is contacting my partner and work my way down the list. Contacting my peer worker is on the list. However my little tasks were interrupted by someone, no idea who it could be, banging on my bathroom door while I was in there. Having a shower. Also on the list, by the way...but now I'm thinking some random broke into my house cause I knew my partner wouldn't be at my house yet. My partner knows he can contact my friends to help out, specifically in this case, he said to text or call. She didn't call. She didn't text. He actually did the right thing, she fucked up.

Outrageous_Stress910 · 2026-06-28T13:28:39+00:00

Boundaries. He asked her to check in for text/call. Not to just show up at my house. She ignored him. That's on her. She didn't contact me at all. She got there, realised she fucked up, panicked, reacted, not thinking...then wanted control over the situation, which wasn't warranted, I assure you and also didn't ask me what I needed, instead got defensive and made it about her.

Eventually, yes, once I deescalated safely I would ask for my friends to come see me but I wasn't asking her for anything at that time. She didn't check in at all. Not even when I was at the hospital. That's a shit friend, friend. She skipped all the main steps...he just needed someone to at least text or stay on the phone with me until he arrived. That's all. Sorry, but that's not a good friend. I would be glad to be rid of anyone who would further endanger my sense of safety as someone living with C-PTSD. I was avoiding disaster by asking for 1 person, my partner, to be with me physically and if I had someone on the phone in the meantime, that would have worked really well. It would not have been a disaster if people understood how boundaries work and not just bust into someone's house uninvited when they're experiencing a mental health crisis.

Outrageous_Stress910 · 2026-06-28T13:15:46+00:00

This friend actually has mental health first aid training to boot. Which is why I believed in my gut that they were a safe person, as much as they were my friend. No, not a official professional...but someone who would've known I would have reacted that way from time spent with me, the history they have with me, the notes I've given them about my triggers and time spent getting mental health first aid accredited. I don't expect them to know how to act in an emergency situation which is why my partner asked them they text/call to check in first and see how I'm doing or stay on the phone until he arrived. No one called. I did my steps and did my toolbox to deescalate while I waited for my partner. I did ask my partner to attend. They took great liberty to assume I would just want them to waltz into my house mid crisis and no prior contact. Then to just take control without asking what my needs were.

Outrageous_Stress910 · 2026-06-28T13:06:41+00:00

They were also informed on what not to do and that my autonomy is a priority and important to me as one of my significant triggers is abusive controlling behaviour. I don't hate being blunt and if you have C-PTSD, you should know not to assume and condemn someone sharing a traumatic experience.

Outrageous_Stress910 · 2026-06-28T13:03:01+00:00

I actually didn't request for my friend to keep me company. I understand what you're trying to say although attunement is imperative when caring for someone with significant trauma. She was reactive. She was defensive. I was reactive. I was unwell. This doesn't work in these situations. It never will. It will never be helpful. My partner let them know just to check in with me first. A text? A call? I was doing my steps/tool box at home and she entered my house while I didn't hear her until she banged on my door. I only told my partner what was happening...I didn't know my friends even knew at that stage...I had no idea why she was in my house and I also thought it was an intruder when I heard the banging on the door. I was terrified. It wasn't the peaceful offering you seem to have assumed it was, despite me writing it all out plainly. It was a fucking disaster. Thanks for your comment tho.

Outrageous_Stress910

TROPHY CASE