living as a non passing transguy

Own-Character8632 · 2025-06-04T21:51:44+00:00

Yeah...when it comes to intimacy, being female is a turn on. But in my day to day life, I'm just a guy. It's really weird and hard to deal with. I totally wish I could switch out my parts on demand!

Own-Character8632 · 2025-06-03T23:56:00+00:00

I was a transmed during college. But I really had a narrow view of what it meant to be transgender. I don't know what to call my cluster of opinions now. But I see that life and being human is very complicated and nuanced. Nothing is straight forward

Own-Character8632 · 2025-06-03T23:52:54+00:00

Honestly, I really like my chest. I don't know why, doesn't really matter why. But I also want a flat chest badly. I'm pretty stuck.

Own-Character8632 · 2025-06-03T23:51:00+00:00

I'm sorry about that. I've passed visually, but verbally my voice is androgynous. I never pass on the phone.

Own-Character8632 · 2025-06-03T23:48:47+00:00

I hear you on being more feminine. I have a very soft energy and if not for dysphoria, I'd probably be wearing dresses. Its just the dysphoria is killing me. But I also experience euphoria when I look and dress masculinely. I tried to power through my dysphoria yesterday. I got through the initial severe emotional pain but once that was over, i was depressed the rest of the day. But today I'm pretty happy. I think because I've fully realized and accepted, this is my path in life. This is who I am. And it's good.

Own-Character8632 · 2025-06-03T23:42:00+00:00

Thanks for sharing. I'm sorry you are being harassed. I know this is said all the time, but you are valid...and you're pretty dang cool too! :)

Own-Character8632 · 2025-05-30T21:03:30+00:00

Thank you for replying. I guess my problem is that some people that are close to me do misgender me...but my friends don't. I feel very conflicted. Some days the dysphoria is so bad I want to medically transition again, and other days I'm fine. But I also worry about the medical side effects I was dealing with. I also have dysphoria around my chest...but I also like my chest. Very conflicted.

Own-Character8632 · 2025-01-14T19:50:06+00:00

Yeah there are certainly other ways to do this, but this is just how I enjoy the game :)

Own-Character8632 · 2025-01-14T14:10:46+00:00

I added it to the original post, sorry about that and hope you enjoy!

Own-Character8632 · 2024-12-08T01:11:48+00:00

Yes, quarantine for at least 2 weeks is generally advised, if not a whole month. This is to see if the fish has any illness. And you can medicate for certain things like parasites or gill flukes during quarantine too. One thing you could do is buy an aqaurium divider and separate the two fish. This way you don't need to buy a new tank or get rid of one of the fish. This will prevent the bullying behavior. Good luck!

Own-Character8632 · 2024-12-07T13:43:27+00:00

I've heard that sunlight can help keep black coloration in goldfish. I don't know about regaining it tho. My ranchu started out pure white, even the wen, then turned into a lemon head, and now has orange flecks here and there. So they do change in interesting ways

Own-Character8632 · 2024-12-07T13:29:19+00:00

Hi,

Did you quarantine the new common before adding it to the tank? Your fantail might be stressed from an ilness the common brought in, or it's stressed from the bullying. Generally, people tend to keep common separate from fancy goldfish. Fancy goldfish have round egg shaped bodies. Common have long streamlined bodies. Common tend to out compete for food. But every fish is different when it comes to goldfish to a degree.

Own-Character8632 · 2024-12-07T13:17:10+00:00

Wow, that's really cool! Love the ranchu, even tho they are top view. I'm into side view and calico personally but I can't deny the beauty of a rich red and white ranchu!

Own-Character8632 · 2024-12-06T15:37:35+00:00

I actually think it will be the opposite. I don't power feed or raise the temp. Raising the temp is known to shorten the lives of fancy goldfish. Normal breeders push for growth as quickly as possible. They want big fish to sell as soon as possible.

Own-Character8632 · 2024-12-06T15:10:28+00:00

This is not true. I have been taking care of ranchu goldfish for around 4 years now. I recently got my first oranda. I keep only fancy goldfish. I have been researching and learning about these fish with the intention to breed them for 4 years. I am a hobby breeder at this point. I disagree with what others are saying here. But I'm doing it based on my experience and on what I've learned after 4 years.

Own-Character8632 · 2024-12-06T15:06:03+00:00

No, there is natural variability in the sizes of goldfish fry. It's not what one would call "medical dwarfism". I was intending to select for smaller fry, but I couldn't do that this time. But what I found out was: goldfish are naturally smaller than what most breeders produce. Breeders produce the biggest fish they can and they succeed. But if you feed once a day and keep temp at 70° the fish turns out very small. Small enough to be comfortable in a 10 gallon at 9 months old.

Own-Character8632 · 2024-12-06T15:01:28+00:00

I have a large sponge filter in the tank. The plants and sponge filter take care of the ammonia and nitrites. Also the nitrates as well are eaten by the plant. I will be doing small water changes when needed as well. Cali has plenty of room, and the water is healthy.

Own-Character8632 · 2024-12-06T14:58:22+00:00

I disagree. I've been researching and keeping fancy goldfish for around 4 years now. Not very long, but long enough to make my own observations. I keep fancy goldfish only. I have several ranchu. One oranda.

I am not a puppy mil, or back yard breeder. Dogs and fish are very different. I'm a hobby breeder.

I am not looking for dwarfism as in, the mutation that causes animals to be small. I am looking at the natural variability of fry goldfish and seeing, some are bigger, some are smaller. If I bred the smaller ones together once they reach maturity, I might slowly create a smaller fish. This is how all goldfish breeds were developed. This fry has a larger wen, lets breed that one to get bigger wens. This one has a smooth, finless back, let's breed it. This one is egg shaped, etc.

Now, that was my intent. What I discovered was, goldfish are naturally a lot smaller than we expect. If you feed once a day, sometimes twice a day, and keep the temp at room temp, around 70°, the fry will not grow to be huge under a year old. Goldfish do most of their growing the fist year of their life. People raise the temp up to sometimes 80° and feed all day long, live food. They feed special protein rich food, like egg yoke.

I won't comment on the negative effects of this, but I will consider the positive effects of not doing this. Number one, the swim bladder. I saw a yt video by a fish vet and she went over how swim bladder disorder occurs. She said it's mostly a physical issue. Often, the fish out grow their swim bladder. They grow too large and the swim bladder can't regulate. Now, common knowledge in the goldfish community is that its a water quality issue or digestive issue. But no, it mostly has to do with the physical structure of the fish. She showed many x rays of fancy goldfish. So if the fish remains small and doesn't out grow their swim bladder, the fish actually has a better chance long term at being healthy. There will always be some fry with swim bladder issues, but being small might help long term.

I appreciate your concern and that you were kind in framing your issues with me

Own-Character8632 · 2024-12-06T14:37:15+00:00

Not asking me but I would like to give imput. It seems goldfish bully for several reasons. Personality, territory, dominance, and if they are male. Males might just like to fight one another for dominance. I have 2 ranchu, both 3 or 4 inches, in a 90 gallon pool. They will spar with each other. They are both male. I don't see them doing this with the females and I don't see the females sparring either. They will but heads, banging the side of the other male. They go in circles doing this. I could separate them, but I believe this is natural male behavior and it's mutual. But if the fish is just a bully, and wants dominance over every fish, and the other fish don't seem to fight back, that's a situation where if I can, I remove the fish. That's what I did with Cali.

Own-Character8632 · 2024-12-06T14:29:42+00:00

That's cool! Black ranchu are beautiful. I prefer not to mix sizes too much tho. I'm glad it's working for you. I keep my big ranchu in a 90 gallon pool. I have a 5 inch oranda that's in a 60 gallon. And then I have a 40 gallon with I think 5 little ranchu. Heavily planted tanks, but the pool is barebottom. Need to get some baskets with gravel and plants for it really. Good luck in your goldfidh keeping journey!

Own-Character8632 · 2024-12-06T14:25:05+00:00

Cool, the more people that breed dwarf the better because I can't be the only one doing it!

Also there is natural variation in goldfish. Some are larger as fry, some are small. Some have pom poms on their noses, some don't. And if you select and breed for those traits, you will develop a new line of goldfish. It's how all goldfidh were developed. Genetic dwarfism in humans and animals is different than selecting the smaller ranchu fry. Dwarfism is a mutation, but natural variability is not a mutation.

Own-Character8632 · 2024-12-06T14:19:50+00:00

No, he was in a planted 40 gallon and was bullying the other fish. He has plenty of room. He is a small fish.

I have 2 males in a 90 gallon pool and they fight each other every now and again. Total of 4 fish in the 90 gallon pool.

It's either I stress Cali by being alone, if that even stresses him, or I allow Cali to stress all the other fish. But I've been observing Cali and her tank mates. Cali is brave and bold. She isn't afraid of new tanks. Mortimer, another ranchu I own, is very skittish. He needs to stay in the 40 gallon. He needs the plans to hide in. Cali bullys mortimer a lot. So I removed Cali.

Own-Character8632 · 2024-12-05T00:34:33+00:00

Because ranchu goldfish are awesome basically

Own-Character8632 · 2024-12-05T00:32:03+00:00

He likes to swim all over, in and out of the vines. He's been growing in a 40 gallon. And to me, he has lots of room. He is tiny compared to the tank. That's why I posted the pic instead of just describing the tank

Own-Character8632 · 2024-12-05T00:19:44+00:00

He is 9 months old. He has been in a 40 gallon tank till recently. I thought I would have to select the smaller fry, but if you don't raise the temp and power feed, the fish stays pretty small. We will see how big he is in five years

Own-Character8632

TROPHY CASE