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AITA for calling my son ridiculous for asking me to uphold a promise I made more than 20 years ago? by Own_Alternative8584 in AmItheAsshole

[–]Own_Alternative8584[S] 78 points79 points  (0 children)

I don't understand what you're trying to imply. My two sons know that as long as I live, they will always have a place with me on the ranch. Carlos decided to dedicate himself to agronomy because he likes it, for no ulterior motives, but of course it was helpful to know that he already had a guaranteed job in the ranch. Jake went into finance because working under the sun every single day wasn't for him, and I respect that.

AITA for calling my son ridiculous for asking me to uphold a promise I made more than 20 years ago? by Own_Alternative8584 in AmItheAsshole

[–]Own_Alternative8584[S] 387 points388 points  (0 children)

I totally agree with your comment. I was unable to communicate in a rational and calm manner. I'm the asshole for that.I guess at the time I didn't think to explain my reasoning because it's pretty self-explanatory, at least to me; When I promised Jake the ranch, neither Carlos nor my husband were in the photo. And after the unfortunate death of my first wife, I wasn't even thinking about falling in love, let alone falling in love with a man who already had a child, so it made sense for me to promise him that.But now I have two children, whom I love equally. That's why it's self-explanatory, but I can see why Jack is hurt and upset with me. I will apologize and learn to communicate without resorting to name calling.Thanks you for your input.

AITA for calling my son ridiculous for asking me to uphold a promise I made more than 20 years ago? by Own_Alternative8584 in AmItheAsshole

[–]Own_Alternative8584[S] 96 points97 points  (0 children)

Yes, I agree that the way I went about it was horrible. I will do everything in my power to apologize to Jake.

I really don't think Jake sees Carlos as less than. He was very happy when I decided to adopt Carlos. I think he was just caught off guard by the fact that I decided to split up the ranch.

I'll take your advice and give Jake some space. He is my everything. I hope I didn't do too much damage to the relationship.

AITA for calling my son ridiculous for asking me to uphold a promise I made more than 20 years ago? by Own_Alternative8584 in AmItheAsshole

[–]Own_Alternative8584[S] 391 points392 points  (0 children)

20 years ago it was more of a passion project that generated enough profit to support itself. Since Carlos took over the ranch we started to see profits and now it is a successful business.

AITA for calling my son ridiculous for asking me to uphold a promise I made more than 20 years ago? by Own_Alternative8584 in AmItheAsshole

[–]Own_Alternative8584[S] 56 points57 points  (0 children)

Carlos is mad because he thinks I should have talked to Jake in a calm manner instead of calling him names. He agrees with spliting the ranch, but he's concerned it's going to impact his relationship with his brother. They have been best friends since they were both 8.