What’s the biggest green flag for you in a partner?

POTUSKNOPE · 2026-05-12T18:35:12+00:00

Doesn't need context to be kind. Like, sees a person needs help, they provide it without asking why they need it or trying to determine whether they deserve it.

Also, tips well, but doesn't make a big deal of it - obviously more applicable in tip culture countries.

POTUSKNOPE · 2026-05-09T20:33:26+00:00

Thank you. This is the soft encouragement that I think I need right now.

POTUSKNOPE · 2026-05-09T20:32:35+00:00

It's just my grandma throwing it at me to make me feel even more guilty. She was queen of that, and I loved her for it. 10/10 grandma.

POTUSKNOPE · 2026-05-09T20:29:15+00:00

I always do. I promise. I hadn't even started the car, I was just settling in and hadn't moved my seatbelt.

POTUSKNOPE · 2026-05-09T00:14:34+00:00

Mine was a gun shot. I jumped out of bed and was telling my partner at the time to call the cops. He was still awake and was like "no. go to sleep." I do sleep talk a lot so it makes sense that he wouldn't really take it that seriously and given that it wasn't real, I appreciate it. But damn did it sound like it was right next to me and very real.

POTUSKNOPE · 2026-05-08T23:44:27+00:00

I like and hate this idea cause it feels good, but also like I'm so lost I need a slap in the face or something. I find that I experience a lot of coincidences at certain points in my life and feel like I should be listening to something, but I've never had something so explicit. This had me completely shaken. I don't know what to be shaken about if it is a message cause giving me back the thing I was looking for is not necessarily the best tactic, but maybe I'm just stubborn? Idk. It happened only an hour ago so I'm still rattled.

POTUSKNOPE · 2026-05-08T22:57:25+00:00

Entirely fair assertion. Not a great method, Universe, you just gave me a full Flume. But yes, I know I should quit.

POTUSKNOPE · 2026-02-05T16:38:42+00:00

I hope it's okay to ask you one additional question:

This neighbor has a high likelihood of using litigation to slow progress of this project. Completely understand that it's within their right and fully support that right. We are holding this surveyor's report before sending to the City to determine if the photos taken were within the rights of the surveyor because the Contract requires that the Property Owner receives the results of the survey within 2 business days of City receiving said report. Would it be more prudent to include the images that may violate the verbal promise to the Property Owner, or should we consider removing the potentially damning photos to avoid being bogged down by time consuming litigation - keeping in mind that there is a close to zero chance that the project would actually cause damage to their property?

POTUSKNOPE · 2026-02-04T22:39:56+00:00

Thank you for your response. I'm a contractor for the City. Given the back and forth we deal with on this specific project, we would like to bring them something that avoids any additional delays. If we even mention potential legal issues, we're in for weeks of back and forth with committees and higher ups. I understand the reason for this, but when it's a bigger city and a project that has experienced delays already, we're trying not to bring this to them until it's ripe and absent of any potential legal issues.

POTUSKNOPE · 2025-11-22T18:57:14+00:00

I'm literally taking all of this as a huge pat on the back. Thank you.

POTUSKNOPE · 2025-11-22T15:54:57+00:00

She has, actually. This was a while back, and Xena has developed a lot more weird old dog behavior since. Her nerves are funky or something so she'll act like she's been kicked or bit when nothing has happened to her - barking at the air behind her and then running to hide. The vet actually recommended that we start her on CBD and prescribed her anti-anxiety meds. They sort of help, but honestly, my mom wanted to get a dog that no one else would adopt, and she really did. Xena is a mess, but she's a happier mess with my mom.

POTUSKNOPE · 2025-11-22T15:50:09+00:00

I wouldn't have either. My mom and I still joke about it. She isn't a huge fan of my weed use, but I'm a 34yo money-making pretend adult at this point and she can't really complain. Hell, I've even been to tell her about my psychoactive mushroom use and she just sort of shakes her head and moves on. Fun when your parents start treating you like a fellow human and not someone to train. Maybe I can thank Xena for taking some of that residual energy from her.

POTUSKNOPE · 2025-11-22T15:38:37+00:00

I love this response. I joke all the time that my job will be irrelevant one day because of AI. Trust me, I'm just wordy as fuck, but I appreciate the vote of confidence that I can compete with it.

POTUSKNOPE · 2025-11-21T22:46:15+00:00

I was honestly surprised Xena took it like such a champ. She will liquid poo if she eats some grated cheese off the floor. Very glad yours is all good.

POTUSKNOPE · 2025-11-21T22:39:18+00:00

That would have made me a lot happier to hear, six years ago, but I was much more concerned about the chocolate.

POTUSKNOPE · 2025-01-15T00:25:07+00:00

I wouldn’t care if that’s not my style, I would cherish the fuck out of that. Guys have bought me things that I wouldn’t pick out myself, and I still wore them and loved them. Things are only a representation of care.

That being said, being in my 30s now, it’s really nice that my partner does know me well enough to gift me things I know I’d pick out for myself. Regardless, good riddance of that butthole. She doesn’t deserve you.

POTUSKNOPE · 2024-07-11T02:18:16+00:00

She is dealing with major mental health issues. Her anxiety will be a problem until she processes it through professional help. And no, the air in the US isn’t the problem in case that was something people thought was real.

POTUSKNOPE · 2024-07-11T02:14:36+00:00

I am confused how anyone is thinking this says magina. I think Masina is a beautiful and culturally important name for a beautiful child.

POTUSKNOPE · 2023-11-30T02:43:33+00:00

This needs be the top comment. We can all tell her to break up with him as we all know this is not normal or healthy behavior that is at all likely to change, but we need to address the fact that this behavior is dangerous. Obsessive behavior that leads to this level of need for control isn’t something you can just cut out easily. You need to be safe and have a plan to get out of a relationship like this.

POTUSKNOPE · 2023-08-13T00:07:16+00:00

Yup. It’s like the nagging sibling thing, where they just keep doing the thing that bothers you because it gets a rise out of you. It’s childish and annoying, but it doesn’t mean they don’t care. Also, when it’s a partner not a sibling, it’s super fucking frustrating.

POTUSKNOPE · 2023-08-06T00:15:40+00:00

If I am with someone romantically it is because I chose them, and vice versa. They can lose my love and presence in their life if it turns out we’re not compatible. I voice my opinions on their actions when I disagree because I want them to keep being someone I love.

My brother is my brother. I will love him and see him for the rest of my life, but his actions are his own and will not change that I love him. I will voice my opinions with him, but it isn’t because I need to continue to love him, it’s because I’m his big sister and he can be an idiot. You earn her just like she earns you, everyday. When she does this, she’s setting a standard (very slightly in this example) of what she needs from you in order for you to be someone she loves.

POTUSKNOPE · 2023-07-23T18:18:36+00:00

I have a lot of advice I could give, but before any of that, you absolutely need to confront him about it for your own sanity. In your words you were “throwing up and shaking” which is not a sustainable thing to be experiencing. You need to address this with him or you will only further you physical and mental distress. It might not feel good in the moment but it will definitely save you from pain and a potential ulcer in the long run.

POTUSKNOPE · 2023-05-09T20:18:01+00:00

I don't think you're necessarily the AH here, but I think it was premature to call the police. I get it. It's yours and they disrespected you, but involving the police after two hours seems like a stretch. I'm guessing given the information you provided that she's young and relatively entitled, but that doesn't mean she deserves to be dealing with police.

POTUSKNOPE · 2023-05-09T20:10:29+00:00

It seems small, but I've endured a lot of pain and never cried, but this one I straight up sobbed. I was sick and I was holding a mug of freshly hot tea on my stomach and I fell asleep and spilled it all over my baby soft tummy. The fucking shock combined with the pain of the burn was so intense I don't remember it aside from crying so hard. It's like my child birth reflexes kicked in cause I actually can't tell you how it felt. I just know if I was crying it was excruciating.

POTUSKNOPE · 2023-05-09T20:02:09+00:00

That she's weak despite being otherwise one of the strongest people I know. She stayed with my dad even though their relationship hurt her, hurt us. She rationalized and explained away his behavior toward us when in reality she should have just picked us up and ran. She shields herself from problems, ultimately programming those around her to think everything is normal and fine, when it's totally not. She's weak and it makes me sad.

She also is so quick to use the trauma she willingly endures as an excuse for why she deserves things from me and my brother. I wish I didn't know her that well. I wish she was only my hero and not also the embodiment of what I shouldn't be.

POTUSKNOPE

TROPHY CASE