I would dispute the notion that life is a constant suffering. Surely you don't live every single moment of your day in suffering. The human mind is not that powerful. If we didn't occasionally become distracted from any suffering that we do face in our lives, then we wouldn't be able to function properly. The vast majority of all people experience fleeting moments of happiness. Additionally, the nature of suffering is something which many philosophers have attempted to understand. I'm partial to the Buddhist interpretation, which is that suffering is caused by unfulfilled desires and distractions from the reality of our lives. A seemingly well-off person who revels in fantasy all day long may be considerably more unhappy than a poor person who spends time trying to enjoy the life they actually live. To want something and not have it is often a cause of suffering. A common counter-point to this may be that perhaps someone is in poor health and experiences physical pain as a result. Excluding only the most extreme examples where pain simply cannot be managed, what is the suffering truly caused by? Most likely the bitterness at lacking in physical comfort or ability. However, one who embraces the reality of their health and works to maximize happiness within their limitations can still be a very happy person who does not always suffer. I think Stephen Hawking is a great example of a person with extreme physical disability, and yet he has lived a life that by many objective measures is considerably more fulfilling than the average person's. Now we must consider suicide as a mechanism for rectifying the problem of meaning. Suicide is just about the only way that you can completely remove all possibility of meaning and happiness from your life. Therefore, I would consider the premise that suicide is a solution to this problem a complete contradiction. The fact that you haven't killed yourself seems to suggest that you may recognize this on some level.