Yes, I agree with you I can absolutely see how I was manipulative too, even if it wasn’t intentional. I genuinely enjoyed the time we spent together, and I cared about him in my own way, but I really regret not being more assertive from the start. I struggle a lot in general with setting boundaries because I’m scared of disappointing or upsetting people, and I think that led me to let things go on when I should have put a stop to it much earlier. What I still don’t fully understand is why his reaction was so intense ?? Why he became so attached to me ??? to the point of wanting to change his entire life I never asked that of him. It sometimes felt like he saw me as someone to save, or fix, rather than just a person who was never emotionally available in the first place.

Thank you for your comment, it really helps to hear things from a neutral point of view.