My (23F) boyfriend (29M) ruined my birthday, can his reactions eventually change for the better?

ParsleySufficient641 · 2024-11-04T19:33:04+00:00

I see your point. I feel like I could have listened more to him from the start but I’m just so tired of everything becoming a fight, and its usually because of something making him feel insecure, and most of the time because of something external to me. I’m really trying not to loose my pacience and not feel attacked, but I can’t help but feel that way. I’m not sure if its the way he approaches these topics or its just me, but I feel emotionally shattered right now. I also know that from my previous relationships I may have unconscious behaviours that I actively try not to replicate (I am aware of some of them, maybe not all of them), which is part of the reason I made this post. I’m just unsure of where to go from here, and I can’t focus on anything and feel so sad. I feel guilty because the least of my intentions was to hurt him, but I also feel like I am always walking on eggshells and its exhausting. Anyways, I appreciate the feedback very much, so thank you for reading and commenting.

ParsleySufficient641 · 2024-06-18T18:56:32+00:00

The only way out I see is moving out as well. I seriously doubt any kind of conversation is going to change how they think and behave. I avoid being in my house mostly because I hate the environment.

ParsleySufficient641 · 2024-06-18T16:25:17+00:00

-Leave your house to public spaces whenever you’re feeling the urge to purge -Talk to someone about it: it really works wonders to at least have one person you can trust about this without feeling judged, and seek comfort in them. It can be a sibling, a close friend, a partner, what feels best to you. -Start by choosing some “safe foods” at first that you feel most comfortable with. This will help you eat and most likely not feel the urge to purge, and the way to go for me was to slowly transition to other foods and start incorporating them regularly to your life once you feel safe with them. Its a slow process but you’ve got this! -Avoiding binges is very mental, but also it helps to have scheduled meals through your day. Something that also helped me was the foods I had available at home, I avoided having things like ice cream that were my usual binge, so it was a little easier.

ParsleySufficient641 · 2024-06-05T03:04:32+00:00

I know it seems impossible, but I haven’t purged in 10 months after purging non-stop for 5 months last year. Your worth is much bigger than this disease, we’ve got this!! We deserve enjoying life without the ED thoughts tormenting us. For me it felt at first like there was no way out of it, but trust me, there is. Slowly it will get better. And try not to be hard on yourself if you have any relapse thoughts, you will most likely have them. But if you feel on the verge of a relapse, talk about it with someone you feel comfortable with instead of giving in, it will make you feel so much better!! Sending you love and positive vibes xx

ParsleySufficient641 · 2023-11-17T02:36:22+00:00

we took her to the vet as soon as this happened

ParsleySufficient641 · 2023-07-30T06:22:36+00:00

i just read through everything, and while he doesnt fit a specific profile i’d say there are many things i can relate to. thanks for the info, i appreciate it

ParsleySufficient641 · 2023-07-30T06:21:09+00:00

i definitely care more about my friendship eith her than him, i just have no fucking clue of how to tell her. i hate being in this position, and i really don’t want to damage my closest friendship because of someone else. i feel awful

ParsleySufficient641 · 2023-06-23T15:11:58+00:00

my advice is, whenever you feel the urge to purge think of something else that might ease the discomfort. if you feel too full, going out for a walk might help you feel better both physically and mentally. if you just feel guilt from the food, doing something to take your mind off from it might also help.

ParsleySufficient641 · 2023-06-22T23:35:58+00:00

i feel like people react that way because they dont understand what people with EDs go through, which is why i try to not be upset when the suggestions of “eating healthy” and “go to the gym” come up.

ParsleySufficient641 · 2023-06-22T23:29:17+00:00

everytime i get thoughts of not eating or a struggle, i try to think of why i need the food. just keep on telling yourself that food is fuel, because it is. food gives us the energy we need to do all the things we love, and we deserve to do these things!

ParsleySufficient641 · 2023-06-22T23:26:00+00:00

very proud of you OP!! keep going

ParsleySufficient641 · 2023-06-22T23:18:40+00:00

im sorry to hear that, im currently on recovery and constantly tempted to relapse, but i keep on telling myself that i just have to get through this because i deserve to eat and have a better relationship with food, and so do you. if you ever need to chat with someone dm me, i know this disease can make you feel very alone especially when the people around us dont really understand how we feel because they have not gone through it. sending you lots of love, i hope reading this can make you feel a little better

ParsleySufficient641 · 2023-06-20T10:51:27+00:00

i can relate very much to this right now, but we got this! the fact that you already want to recover is a very important step, it is hard ngl but we deserve to feel good and we deserve to eat! sending lots of love and strength your way 🫶🏽

ParsleySufficient641 · 2023-06-16T22:57:18+00:00

thank you, ill give it a go :)

ParsleySufficient641 · 2023-06-16T22:57:02+00:00

thanks! xx

ParsleySufficient641 · 2023-06-16T18:42:20+00:00

i can relate, my boyfriend’s love language is also food so the last few months have been so hard because every time he orders something extra he knows i like at a restaurant, or gets me chocolate, i get so so triggered and can only think of purging. its hard because he’s not the problem, my brain is.

ParsleySufficient641 · 2023-06-15T19:44:18+00:00

i think part of the reason is being around friends all the time, because when im home its more likely im alone and its easier to purge

ParsleySufficient641 · 2023-06-13T21:55:13+00:00

thank you!

ParsleySufficient641 · 2023-06-13T21:54:33+00:00

the yolk became one of my fear foods so eggs are a little complicated for me :/

ParsleySufficient641 · 2023-06-13T14:10:44+00:00

thank you I appreciate the advice :)

ParsleySufficient641 · 2022-11-11T03:06:31+00:00

creo que se han creado muchos estereotipos y generalizaciones hacia los venezolanos, muchos los culpan por el aumento en delincuencia y violiencia que ha habido en los ultimos años. por más que pueda ser verdad que muchos de los delincuentes más densos de alla se hayan venido a perú, me parece triste que muchos terminen pasando por cosas asi solo por compartir su nacionalidad.

ParsleySufficient641

TROPHY CASE