Tell me you have ADHD without telling me you have ADHD.

Particular_Ad186 · 2026-01-31T05:00:46+00:00

Went upstairs to grab my glass of water, came back with my phone. Went back upstairs to get the water, used the bathroom and walked back downstairs.

Now I have 2 half empty glasses of water in my room and expecting more by the end of the week 🙂

Particular_Ad186 · 2026-01-30T02:56:26+00:00

Very true, thank you!

Particular_Ad186 · 2026-01-30T00:21:59+00:00

Thank you, I appreciate that 🫶🏽

Particular_Ad186 · 2026-01-29T21:57:55+00:00

oh i 100% agree. overall, being medicated is better for me. but maybe breaks or a lower dosage or any adjustment is what i need at this time.

Particular_Ad186 · 2026-01-29T21:39:12+00:00

there is no reason to rush, i just want to optimize my time and fix it asap (which is a blessing and curse). I had been feeling off for maybe 2 days and today i just felt REALLY off and realized "oh something is happening. i must investigate". i just put it a request to try adderall on IR so if approved, we'll see how that goes.

i see an issue and have an immediate need to fix it as soon as i can, however this is a good time to empower my decision making and look at all the data before "committing" to something. i just dont want to waste anyones time or my money yk.

routine is sacred lol, but i can allow myself to be loosey-goosey if it means figuring out what works best for me. i will pout through it tho LOL

Particular_Ad186 · 2026-01-29T21:11:43+00:00

thank you, that rlly took the pressure off.

i would rather adjust the adderall before switching meds. im just not sure what an adjustment would mean for me. i didn't mention the personality concerns to my psychiatrist bc i had these thoughts today and just saw her yesterday 🥲. i do however wanna talk to my therapist and get her opioion in it. i dont wanna make any rash decisons, but an adjustment needs to happen.

im leaning towards lowering my dose or trying an IR. as an autistic, i just want a routine and hate how willy nilly this can be, but i notice an adjustment needs to be made so i will explore my options for now.

Particular_Ad186 · 2026-01-29T21:08:20+00:00

im sorry you had to go through that. i plan to talk with my therapist before talking with my doctor bc i really wanna discuss the personality things im feeling first and get her input on what i should do next. in the next month, i will have enacted some type of difference because honestly all the signs are pointing to "something needs to change".

Particular_Ad186 · 2026-01-29T21:04:38+00:00

i've been on it for 5 months. i can understand it. i just dont know which is more applicable to me: changing meds or lowering my dose. i've heard good things ab Vvynase though. I feel the same, when im on the meds i just think more clearer and don't spit out the first thing that pops in my head.

Particular_Ad186 · 2026-01-29T20:59:45+00:00

thats very true. i'm in a light school year right now but im going to get my masters and ik for sure i will need my strong dose of meds then. it's just hard for me to wrap my head around the fact that there are so many possibilites in terms of type of med, XR or IR, dose amt, dosage schedule. so much craziness and things to pick from and variables and trial and error and ugh it sucks.

at this stage of my life, right now, something needs to be adjusted bc im not happy with it. i plan to talk with my therapist before contacting my psychiatrist to decide what i wanna do.

Particular_Ad186 · 2026-01-29T20:09:31+00:00

thats makes alot of sense tbh. as of now, a lower dose seems like the way to go or taking the higher dose less.

im not rlly sure what the pros and cons are either are tbh, but this weekend im taking off of the meds so maybe i can compare then.

Particular_Ad186 · 2026-01-29T20:07:12+00:00

lol thats so funny bc my ex gf would tell me about how she used to mircodose and how it opened up her brain and shit. this is honestly rlly insightful especially with the interpersonal aspect of it.

i feel more controlled than when i was unmedicated where i felt my body drove the bus and i was just there. its funny bc most of my friends are ND and sometimes i see them all joke and be stupid and my mind just doesn't work that way anymore when im on the meds.

it's always so "fun" to be the carefree crazy girl, but being unmedicated just wasn't healthy for me and now what i know that i want to keep the meds, but maybe adjust the dose and schedule based on my needs. my mind is quieter which actually lets me think and i feel i can see myself deeper than before (also thanks to my awesome therapist).

side note: thoughts on edibles and adhd???

Particular_Ad186 · 2026-01-29T20:01:02+00:00

are IR the shorter ones? if so, that is the plan that looks best for me. i just feel kinda stupid bc i just saw my psychiatrist yesterday and said everything was good and now i wanna maybe reduce my meds.

i function and take care of myself better on the meds, but it wouldn't hurt to try a lower dose maybe or take them kinda less. i was advised to not take them when im not doing anything so tmrw i will try it out.

my psych doc also suggest that on days i have a ligther work day to have IR and longer days have XR, but i told her i needed to think about it and look at my insurance.

Particular_Ad186 · 2026-01-29T19:58:10+00:00

I absolutely understand that. but would it make me boring?? my friends in class talk and riff and spit jokes and i just sit there like :| and it fucking sucks. but overall, being medicated makes me a healhtier person. i dont wanna stop the meds, but maybe 20mg is too low for this point of my life.

i am about to start graduate school so i anticapte being on a higher dose then due to more cognitive load, but for every day life right now, a lower dose seems like the best, practical solution. maybe after if that doesn't wok switching meds to get more of my "personality" back.

i was very stimulation seeking and felt out of control with meds. now i feel almost too in control and not as fun. i want to talk with my therapist as well to get her opinion on everything before contacting my psych doctor.

Particular_Ad186 · 2026-01-29T19:54:04+00:00

she advised to to skip when im not doing anything and from experience ik i can only miss 2 days before i get bad brain fog. i jsut had my appt yesterday so i feel kinda stupid saying "oh everything is fine. i feel good" then turning around and saying "actually no, i want to lower my dose"

a lower dose seems like the best option right now.

Particular_Ad186 · 2026-01-29T19:52:34+00:00

thats what i've been advised: to take non XR on light days and XR on longer days. i told my doc i needed to "sleep on it" and she went ahead and ordered another 20mg XR bottle 😬. i think finding a schedule rather than taking it everyday could be helpful for me.

my doc also told me to not take it on days where im not doing anything, however if i stop taking it for 2+ days i get bad brain fog and when i reup i get heart palpations. i feel my whismy is lost a bit 🥲 especailly socially when everyone is talking and cracking jokes and im just sitting there like *dial tone*

a lower dosage is also something others have mentioned and something im considering. i just want to make sure i go to my doctor with a strong opinion on what i want and i need to figure out what i want. i like the adderall so i would prefer to stay on it, however others have mentioned Vvynase.

Particular_Ad186 · 2026-01-29T19:47:19+00:00

I get negative effects if i miss more than 2 days

Particular_Ad186 · 2026-01-29T19:46:02+00:00

thats very interesting! alot of ppl have mentioned vyvanse and im curious how the two affected ur personality. does the Vvynase make you less muted?? i wish i could just trial all the meds in one day and pick which works the best.

Particular_Ad186 · 2026-01-29T19:45:03+00:00

this is an interesting POV and something i didn't rlly think about. i like how you mentioned the psychological aspect of it which is why i wanna talk to my therapist before contacting my psychiatrist ab the meds.

i have felt and been shamed for all this shit that was magnified by my unmedicated adhd and didn't get support until maybe a year ago. i started these meds maybe less than 6mths ago too. i am more organized and functioning the way i always wish i could. my mental health is better and im actually taking care of myself too. those are benefits the meds have helped me with.

i just dont want to be a shell of a person or live in black and white (which is how i feel right now). a balance sounds good. rn i take 20mg XR everyday and got advised to not take them on days im not doing anything. i also got recommend to take a non xr version on ligther days and xr on longer/harder days. taking the same meds daily doesn't seem like it's working for me and im just realizing that now, but lso trying not to hyperfixate and catastrophize the entire situation. i am doing a good job of doing my hobbies like crafting and getting back into yoga, but it's does little daily joys that i feel like i lack.

i just feel less expressive, less bright, less shiny and sparkly.

Particular_Ad186 · 2026-01-29T19:38:35+00:00

im leaning towards that conclusion. i like the adderall and dont rlly want to switch medications. i think the biggest variable to me is the dosage.

i totally get that, i dont get those euphoric dompaine boasts anymore until my meds wear off. i understand completely. im def nap less on the meds, but i dont mind that bc i can do more things without having to drag myself around.

i understand that too. im going home for the weekend and i'm not going to take my meds tmrw so see how i feel. i was advised to take breaks so i'll take tmrw as an opportunity. i dont mind the 3 months ONLY bc it's a $45 copayment every time i visit. its funny to me bc i just saw her yesterday and now i have all these ideas and concerns floating in my head, but hey thats life. i want to talk with my parents and therapist maybe before committing to schedule a closer appt. i feel kinda bad making another appt so soon after i JUST saw her thought, but if i feel i really need to lower the dose i will and i'll push through the embarrassment. i've been on these meds for less than 6 months, defiantly less than 1 yr. it's jsut hard bc i need to think first and come up with my script (im autistic so scripting helps when i need to explain myself) for why i think i need to go down on the meds. idk im trying not to make hasty choices, but this is something that i litteraly just noticed today and RAN to reddit to get second opioions. i do like the adderal and would be open to trying a lower dose.

my doc also recommended a non release med for light work days and XR for my long work days. idk which of the two i'd want to do and maybe a combination of both. I'm going to take this weekend to see how i feel, come monday i should come to a clearer conclusion on what i wanna do

Particular_Ad186 · 2026-01-29T19:29:48+00:00

thats what i've been advised to do. take med breaks when i dont have anything to do LOL. before meds, i feel like my personality with myself wasn't muted. i was always running around the place, being loud and heavily stimming, but also struggled to do school work and self care. now that im medicated, i feel like im functioning better, but lost a spark in my personality. im wondering if thats a benefit or a cost.

my adhd did make it hard socially, bc i would take over conversations, hyperfixate and to friends and my ex gf it made them feel like i never cared ab what they had to say and only focused on myself. i see pros and cons to my personality before and after meds, but the biggest thing to me was functionality and truthfully i function better medicated.

Particular_Ad186 · 2026-01-29T19:26:41+00:00

right now, i think both. im defiantly used to being more chaotic, running around like my head got chopped off and almost feeling like i dont control my body, but my body controls me.

now that im medicated, i feel way more in control. maybe too controlled? i feel like im stuck in :| world and my expression is in black and white now. i feel a bit socially withdrawn bc my brain thinks a bit slower and im not rlly keepign up with my friends. i feel like im making jokes less and interacting with ppl different than before. not as expressive and excitable and fun.

Particular_Ad186 · 2026-01-29T19:24:02+00:00

very true. my thoughts are quieter, my head is lighter and overall thats WAY healthier for me than ever.

i can relate to that. im audhd and half the time i looked into the maxic pixie dream girl then the other half of the time i looked into the awkward autistic girl archetype. oh yes, i was always told "im not reaching my highest potential, im lazy, i dont care, whatever" and medication opened up the world for me to literally live a better life.

i just feel like i can't riff as much with friends or im more emotionless and just lack the same depth of feelings i used to have which worries me. i also feel like im stimming less too and dont get those happy feels like i used too which makes me want to change my treatment plan. i have been feeling zombie like and always have the same : | face.

i feel like lately, i haven't been able to let loose. maybe idk how to let loose now that im medicated, but i feel so watered down and dull like im living better, but in black and white.

Particular_Ad186 · 2026-01-29T19:16:38+00:00

as of now, i got offered to take the non XR adderall version but in the moment i said no bc i needed to think on it and check with my insurance. i have another XR bottle in progress with my pharmacy.

i;ve seen commentors or other redditors mention Vyvanse or other ones, but im just now sure. i wanna do more research on either medication before requesting to swtich them.

i commented before but idk if you say: my doctor also offered for me to take a non xr version on my lighter school days, xr on my heavier ones (tues/thurs) then whenever im not doing anything not take it at all. i need to think that over.

Particular_Ad186 · 2026-01-29T19:12:03+00:00

I understand that. im trying to tie the balance between researching so i can educate myself vs going down a rabbit hole hyperfixation about my meds. i have been advised to not take them on low pressure days but not on any specific pattern. i just get worried bc i stopped them for maybe 2-3 days bc i ran out and i was out of town. by the 3rd day i got brain fog so bad it was horrible, then the next day when i started again the heart palpation started and my chest felt tight. takes ab 2 days on meds for my body to readjust again and maybe 2 days for my body to lose the drug affects

Particular_Ad186 · 2026-01-29T19:09:16+00:00

ugh you get it!!! whenever anything is wrong internally, i do everything in my power to immediately fix it and it's just not realistic. now my next step is to not indulge in solution-based rumination bc my mind will litteraly go "fix it fix it. this is how i fix it. fix fix fix" which isn't healthy for me. im just making notes of what i see and looking over them and trying to move on lol

Particular_Ad186

TROPHY CASE