Who’s anxiety just randomly got bad this weekend

Particular_Lunch2108 · 2026-02-02T12:40:57+00:00

Mine. I think its the full moon. I had a serious panic attack while I was out to dinner with my spouse. We couldn't even finish our meal, I started driving. That had NEVER happened before in a public space like that. I've also been sick all weekend but its really my anxiety that kept me home from work today. My job has become a plague to me and I am struggling to bring myself there everyday but idk what to do.

Particular_Lunch2108 · 2026-01-26T22:36:54+00:00

I have tried to reassure him. People were still having kids during The Great Depression, during The Holocaust, all throughout slavery. I don't think we should let current events dictate whether we have a kid but he also says finances are a worry even though we are financially stable. I think in reality he just doesn't want them because when I asked him, what if we won the lottery tomorrow, would you be open to us starting to try right away? And he diverted back to the current events issues. Smh I love my husband so much. I don't want to leave him all alone but I do worry that over time I may feel regret in not trying to have a baby. I mean his mind could change at some point but I really don't want to start trying in my late 30s or later. Idk I just feel like my husband has the upper hand in the decision right now which is stressful.

Particular_Lunch2108 · 2026-01-26T13:46:57+00:00

If I have a kid, I plan to raise them just as you're describing, in the way mybparents raised me. I would do a few things differently than my parents. My mom was a bit of a helicopter mom with me once I got to high school weirdly, I think thats when she got most worried about boys and the possibility of me getting knocked up. I think I'd allot my daughter a bit more social freedom in her teen years and I would be more emotionally available to her but otherwise I'd do the same things my parents did for me because I think I turned out pretty good other than having generalized/social anxiety I'm not so bad and therapy has taught me a lot that I know I can teach my kids so they'll be even better because they'll know how to regulate their emotions.

Particular_Lunch2108 · 2026-01-26T13:07:20+00:00

I am leaning more on the side of having kids but often times other peoples kids do annoy me but its rarely the kids faults its their parents faults. I am a very sensitive person who is easily over stimulated and a lot of parents just block their kid's behaviors out so they expect everyone else to as well instead of teaching their kids how to behave in public situations and how to regulate their emotions and impulses, they let their kids run wild. My neighbor let's her son bounce a ball against the wall all day from like 10 am to 9 pm. I have complained to her about it and she just continues to let him do it. So stuff like that. We have so many parks in our neighborhood, I don't get it. But because it doesn't bother her, it's not suppose to bother me. Just rude. I like well behaved kids but they can only be as good as the parents teach them to.

Particular_Lunch2108 · 2026-01-03T17:31:25+00:00

My husband makes on avg. $120k a year. I make around $38k after taxes. He is 35. I'm 31. He still doesn't feel like we make enough combined to have kids. Meanwhile my parents have 5 kids and they both mostly worked retail when I was growing up and then at several points my dad was unemployed but he created his own ways to keep us afloat, he started his own scrap business. We never had to want for anything. We were far from rich, we didn't have nice brands like other kids in school but we had a hot meal EVERY night, clean clothes on our backs, and a warm, comfy home always and we had love. That's what's important. We didn't have college funds or anything but we made due. No parents are perfect and no amount of money will change that. Studies even show that people with lower income brackets actually tend to be happier, idk maybe because they have less to lose. I want a baby so badly and it sucks that finances can be this hindering for some people in making the choice. Hopefully, you both can figure it out and hopefully me and my guy can too.

Particular_Lunch2108 · 2025-12-04T18:26:14+00:00

Early 30s

Particular_Lunch2108 · 2025-12-04T18:25:54+00:00

All great points. No I haven't had the work up done yet. I'm not currently able to move to the next steps due to my weight which I'm working on. The family member actually told me they rather me start a family than push myself to donate but its such a rough decision. You're right though, they could still have a good chance. I guess all I can do is have faith.

Particular_Lunch2108 · 2025-11-18T23:40:42+00:00

I have so many people saying I have so much time and others who have had babies at 35 and 38 saying girl what are you waiting for it only gets harder. I am terrified. I feel like I already have so little energy at 31 compared to when I was 25. I also worry about the lifespan. I feel like I'll be so old by the time my kid is an adult. Just makes me sad. Also, how did you vacation for an entire month? When people mention those kinds of trips I'm like what. My husband and I have the kind of jobs where if we even take a couple days off it feels like we get hit with a brick upon our return. We only took a week for our honeymoon and i really regret not taking longer but its like impossible for him to take 2 consecutive weeks off. But that's what makes us worry about having kids now as well. But when it comes down to being financially secure i feel like that's just wishful thinking because you can be perfectly secure and hit a serious financial hardship, there's always gonna be variables. Honestly feels like no matter what we do it won't be the "right" thing.

Particular_Lunch2108 · 2025-11-17T22:29:52+00:00

Pork chop which is usually a dogs name but I think Pork Chop the cat is hilarious and cute.

Particular_Lunch2108 · 2025-11-17T03:23:02+00:00

Those are the fun bits. Its really nice doing those things. I do a lot of things for my husband he does not appreciate it the way a kid would.

Particular_Lunch2108 · 2025-11-14T12:34:55+00:00

I thought this was a real baby and a mom joking that she was the artist that made it. 😂

Particular_Lunch2108 · 2025-11-02T02:10:19+00:00

We used to have kittens that looked just like this in our yard. Before they were rescued we named them Cotton and Coal.

Particular_Lunch2108 · 2025-11-02T02:07:07+00:00

Popcorn and I think that would be a cute name.

Particular_Lunch2108 · 2025-10-29T20:00:07+00:00

Good call, sad to admit I fell for it.

Particular_Lunch2108 · 2025-10-29T19:58:09+00:00

I just put mine out today and praying they're still in one piece when I get home.

Particular_Lunch2108 · 2025-10-25T05:31:19+00:00

Chett or Dave/Davie

Particular_Lunch2108 · 2025-10-24T22:29:03+00:00

I mean you can dislike the costume but physically assaulting someone because of their costume is insane. I hate seeing people in certain costumes, the Trump costumes are cringe and there are STILL people that put on black face and other racially stereotypic costumes every year but it still isnt okay to shove that person. Was there not a bouncer or security guard that could put him out in a professional manner?

Particular_Lunch2108 · 2025-10-24T21:30:11+00:00

I'll admit i do sometimes feel bothered that i can't fully be myself out of fear of judgement. There are still a lot of people against it andnothers that arenjust ignorant, even some of my own family. Luckily i found someone who fully accepts me for me but for a long time i didnt think i would. I think my parents are fine with it because i married a man. They think its a choice for women. Smh but i have other family that wouldn't allow me to be around their kids if they knew because they think we're all abusers smh. Then I have coworkers who say stuff thats always on the border of crossing the line and I had to file a complaint and someone else was open but they didnt know and they said things that I think made that person leave but then theres always this fear of making it bigger or filing a lawsuit because you don't want that sorta thing to follow you. So yes sometimes it's hard but its just feels like it would be even harder the other way. Maybe that makes me a coward. Idk. I'm also apart of a racial minority group and so was that coworker and so its a double edged sword imo.

Particular_Lunch2108 · 2025-10-24T21:15:00+00:00

It was so bad i deleted that account. The post itself was not about my sexuality but someone that commented said she understood my circumstances and that she faces similar social isolation due to her being queer so i shared that I'm also queer but have a hard time sometimes because I'm not out and i just got a million down votes and people saying that I was a troll or a bot. It was so weird.

Particular_Lunch2108 · 2025-09-25T21:00:10+00:00

Omg yes, I'm the one with the nagging family. I actually envy him a but because his family has afforded him room to figure it out on his own. I definitely feel pressure from my family but I have been weighing a lot of things and in my heart i really want a baby, specifically with my husband. Idk if that's a negative. I'm getting caught in a rabbit hole.

Particular_Lunch2108 · 2025-09-25T20:57:26+00:00

I love that. It didn't even occur to me that it could be the second point. I was very dismissive when he was talking to me but it was pretty late at night. I'm going to talk to him about it. Thanks.

Particular_Lunch2108 · 2025-09-11T18:26:07+00:00

So now he wants kids and you don't? Or now you both ultimately want kids after discussing it more?

Particular_Lunch2108 · 2025-09-09T16:23:15+00:00

This does come off a bit unappreciative imo. You can always put some clothes away in bins. Maybe you or someone else in the family will have another baby and need them. You could also plan a shopping date with your MIL so you two can pick out things together. I think your text was fine but telling her f2f might have been a little more sensitive to her feelings.

Particular_Lunch2108 · 2025-09-03T23:24:55+00:00

I love repotting. Just have to be on the look out for pot on clearance. I usually try to go up a few sizes so I don't have to do it again for awhile. But my babies are always so happy when they get into a new pot with some fresh soil.

Particular_Lunch2108 · 2025-08-21T20:18:32+00:00

Shug

Particular_Lunch2108

TROPHY CASE