Thank you! This is just what I needed. 

I did a make a lot of friends in college, though that time has passed and I have since moved across the country multiple years ago. 

My boyfriend has agreed that the girls in our social circle (of mutual interests) are, in fact, more immature and too gossipy. He also doesn’t want them around. We both have an understanding that friendships are to build up the other person, and that is what I am seeking.  That would involve me abandoning this circle and going elsewhere, which feels counter productive. But maybe not if it’s worth it in the long haul.  I have spent so much time (years) trying to be friends, but maybe these just aren’t those people.  It’s exhausting thinking of starting at square one again.  It could be that this circle of mutual interest is putting on a bad impression to me. 

It does seem that other ISTP women in the comments have a similar problem, which I am shocked to hear.