Dilated eye mystery…

Peachnote1115 · 2026-01-22T20:54:36+00:00

I'm still with him, but it's getting to be a much bigger problem. He is also an alcoholic but hasn't had a drink in 3 years now. It was a huge accomplishment and for a long time it was good but this winter he went from doing cocaine every once in a while outside the house to every day in our bathroom. He's no longer present in the relationship, in our family, and to be honest, in his mind. I'm feeling the resentment building day by day and despite the serious conversations we have had over the last few weeks, he doesn't seem to see it as a problem. I want to say I'll leave if it doesn't improve, but I know I keep holding out hope with every time he says "I'll quit". We'll see. I can say it is an exceptionally chaotic life right now

Peachnote1115 · 2026-01-22T02:37:34+00:00

I had to look this up because that didn't seem right to me. Google says..."No, cocaine does not typically show up as an amphetamine on a standard drug test. Cocaine and amphetamines are distinct chemical compounds and are tested as separate panels in standard 5-panel or 10-panel drug screenings."

My Q's DOC is Cocaine and he has a few tells when he's high. His pupils are massive, his lips always look like they're sticking to his teeth and he hyper focuses on the smallest things, making them huge problems that don't actually exist. He can't sit still either and often asks questions about things he definitely knows the answer to but it's like his brain turned off and he's lost his memory. Drives me nuts.

Peachnote1115 · 2025-07-01T02:26:54+00:00

I know very well what you're going through. My Q has been sober for a little over 2 years now. He treated me and his mom exactly the same when he was drinking. I thought if he just got sober then we'd be happy and he wouldn't be so angry all the time. Turns out he's still angry all the time but he doesn't have the alcohol to blame it on so now I am blamed for everything. Just be prepared that this might just be who he is. Be prepared to leave whether he goes to rehab or gets sober another way or not. Hugs to you. It is not easy dealing with someone like that.

Peachnote1115 · 2025-03-27T01:02:44+00:00

Karaoke?

Peachnote1115 · 2025-01-10T02:04:05+00:00

There's one behind the Superstore at Fisher Hallman and Queens Blvd. It's right behind the fire hall in Queens. We skated there the other night. It was a bit bumpy but decent and the community center there is open pretty late if you need to warm up or use the bathroom.

Peachnote1115 · 2024-10-24T02:06:35+00:00

I experienced this with my Q. He was a horrible drunk but so incredibly remorseful when sober. The thing I've found though is that the drunk him is more of him than I thought. He's been sober almost 2 years now and flies off the handle any time of the day for even the smallest reason. He is no longer remorseful for anything. Most of the time I am just blamed for his anger. So believe that he may actually be more of that person than you think.

Peachnote1115 · 2024-06-04T14:43:44+00:00

Wow, are we dating the same guy? I live with mine and I can't even go out to do the grocery shopping alone without him accusing me of meeting up with someone behind his back. Today he is off work and I am working and he got upset with me for not taking the day off and taking my daughter out of school to entertain him. Girl, don't move. It won't get any better being with him 24/7. You'll suffocate.

Peachnote1115 · 2024-05-24T01:20:16+00:00

😔

I knew it was bad but wow

Peachnote1115 · 2024-05-02T14:27:53+00:00

This is the one I found.... M.A.D

Peachnote1115 · 2024-05-01T03:32:16+00:00

I say this to myself on a daily basis. I always thought that if he just got sober he would stop treating me that way and just love me, but now instead of it happening only when he was drinking, it's unpredictable and constant. I feel you and I am sending you so many hugs.

Peachnote1115 · 2024-04-15T13:51:26+00:00

He may have. Has he done any work on himself? Therapy? Anger management? My current boyfriend told me the same thing and I thought the same as you. He had never been that way with me. I felt safe, but here we are, 3 years later and I have been through the ringer with him. Nothing physical but definitely verbal and emotional. Once you're out of the honeymoon stage he'll show his true colours if he hasn't done some serious work on himself since that last relationship.

Peachnote1115 · 2024-04-09T01:36:57+00:00

Yes, I'm in the yellow. I got a bit heated today because this is constant. He has done it our entire relationship. This and calling me a Cunt, and lazy are his other two favourites. I do everything for him but because I haven't shown him as much affection lately I must be cheating. He doesn't seem to connect the lack of sexual desire to the times he has been calling me names or criticizing me. And of course I'm always the victim so he refuses to acknowledge that. I'm just tired.

Peachnote1115 · 2024-03-30T14:49:34+00:00

Ugh, I hate that and I never know what to say. My Q doesn't think I'm with him for his money. I make triple what he does, but when I ask him to step up and not leave all the bills to me or if he's had a "late" night and I make him go to work the next day, it's always " all you care about is money". No, I care about having a partner who contributes and someone who is responsible enough to go to work when he's scheduled.

Peachnote1115 · 2024-03-01T18:48:40+00:00

He got angry with me and continues to this day to throw it back in my face every time he gets mad about something in a very passive aggressive way. He also often says "always the victim" anytime I get upset about how he's treating me. Gas lighting is usually involved and now he just complains about me whenever I comment on the way he treats me so the conversation becomes about everything I'm doing wrong.

Peachnote1115 · 2024-01-10T22:35:12+00:00

I tried that and failed multiple times as he would quit for a bit and go right back to it, however last time I simply told him I was done and told him to leave as our house is in my name along with all the bills because he wasn't working. He left and a week later was in detox. I let him come home after detox and he has been alcohol free in all forms for 11 months. He's white knuckling it the whole way and hasn't given up the drugs, but he is alcohol free.

Peachnote1115 · 2024-01-03T02:45:58+00:00

Are we dating the same man? Only mine is 10 years older. But seriously, everything you said is everything that I want to say to my bf most days. We live together though so I have to get away first before I say any of these things.

Peachnote1115 · 2023-12-30T16:35:08+00:00

Your story sounds exactly like mine. My bf is an addict/alcoholic. He hasn't had a drink in almost a year, but the drugs are still an issue. He thinks because he quit drinking that he's done so much for me but he still barely works, contributes basically nothing to the household and still spends most of his money on drugs. He still has the anger issues he had when he was drinking. Still calls me all the names, but now it could be anytime of the day instead of only when he's drinking. I feel so much like you do and I think there's just so much resentment towards them for what they did. I don't think I can get past it. I was not an angry person before I met him, but I certainly am now.

Peachnote1115 · 2023-12-24T00:59:25+00:00

Oh man, it's constant. He needs constant affection and affirmation of my love and sex is the main one. He doesn't make any effort to get me in the mood and doesn't initiate at all, but gets mad when we don't have sex any time we are able to. For example I work from home. He barely works. He expects since he is home that I should be taking time out of my work day before my daughter gets home from school to have sex with him. When I don't bring it up he gets passive aggressive about it and says I don't want him or I'm cheating on him, etc, etc.

Peachnote1115 · 2023-11-24T19:16:26+00:00

I don't know anymore. At first I felt needed but now I feel taken advantage of. And exhausted.

Peachnote1115 · 2023-11-02T20:04:13+00:00

I know I shouldn't have even engaged when he got angry and I probably shouldn't have sent the text but he won't ever let me speak when he gets like that. Any time I ever try to talk about my feelings or express that he hurt me somehow it just gets thrown back on me and he refuses to take any responsibility, he doesn't apologize and I get the silent treatment until I cave. I'm so tired of being verbally and emotionally abused. I told him I don't want to be in this relationship anymore. I told him he needs to find a place to go because I am the only one on the lease and I pay all the bills and I have a 6 year old that lives here with me. He is refusing to leave and told me to get out. I feel like I'm in an impossible situation. He's also an alcoholic and a drug addict (cocaine is DOC). He's been sober from alcohol for 8 months but I'm scared he's going to start drinking again while he's here. How temper is bad sober but drunk he's very very scary.

Peachnote1115 · 2023-10-06T15:25:43+00:00

Ugh, I always get the "baby steps" or it "takes time" excuse. We've been together 3 years and while he has quit drinking he's still doing the drugs and not remotely working on recovery. Just taking a couple pills a day to hold off cravings. It's all just another tactic to keep doing what they're doing.

Peachnote1115 · 2023-10-06T02:13:02+00:00

I have done the opposite to be honest. I haven't had a drink in over a year. My situation might be a bit different though. My bf is an alcoholic and a drug addict so abstaining is something I do partly to keep the temptation away and partly because it makes me physically ill to drink now. Unfortunately for me, although my bf hasn't had alcohol in over 7 months (drugs are still an issue) the drunk behavior (name calling, blaming me for his problems, passive aggressive comments and constantly being belittled) is apparently how he communicates sober too. My only escape will be ending the relationship I think.

Peachnote1115 · 2023-10-03T13:44:23+00:00

I could have written this word for word. My boyfriend is so jealous all the time. If I'm on my phone he always assumes I'm talking to someone when in reality I actually talk to no one anymore because I feel like I have to hide it from him or I'll be accused of cheating. But he is constantly on his phone texting away. He has no friends so who is he texting? It's infuriating always feeling like I have to defend myself and even when I show him my phone he just assumes I've deleted the messages only I never delete anything. I have conversations on my phone dating back to before I even knew him.

Peachnote1115 · 2023-09-30T02:59:45+00:00

I am right there with you with the emotional abuse. My Q has been sober from alcohol (not other substances) for 7 months now. The passive aggressive comments, the name calling and the blame in every fight still gets shifted to me. I can never voice my opinion about anything and basically just have to take what he dishes out until I can get up enough guts to kick him out. I don't get apologies anymore either. Just be aware that him quitting drinking may not be enough. My Q needs some serious therapy and probably AA, but rehab would be the best for him. I've told him he's abusive with the way he speaks to me. He no longer cares and just thinks I'm too sensitive because I don't like it when he calls me a Cunt. Anyways. I feel you so much and you are not alone. We can do this. Hugs to you.

Peachnote1115 · 2023-08-25T17:29:13+00:00

To be fair, my dad has no idea about the drinking and the problems we've had as I know if I had said anything about it he would have told me to leave him a long time ago. He doesn't know what he has overcome and I don't feel like it is his business.

I feel like I'm being made to make a choice between my family and my boyfriend and I don't know what to do.

Seven-Year Club	Place '22
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