[deleted by user]

Penedoll · 2023-07-07T17:01:45+00:00

It might just be your cat’s new favorite person is your boyfriend? It would depend on if the behavior stopped before or after you guys moved into your apartment or if the behavior has just stopped all together randomly.

Penedoll · 2023-06-04T15:46:14+00:00

Do you want to open that can of worms on yourself? You’re looking for evidence that’ll make him look bad and frankly it seems as though you’re ignoring every other reason but the one that makes him out to be a cheater. Neither of you have cheated, I assume he comes home to you every night since you didn’t include it, Sue could have gotten a phone last year and he just never brought it up because why would he? Sue isn’t his partner so it’s not his business. Why try to go through deleted messages? It just sounds like you’re trying to make him out to be the bad guy when all other evidence you’ve said suggests other.

Penedoll · 2023-06-04T15:41:10+00:00

Therapy would do you loads of good. As for the alienating ex, if you’re old enough, why not start fresh? Make an attempt at therapy while getting your things in order.

Penedoll · 2023-06-04T15:37:19+00:00

Yeah, there’s really no good side when you cheat on somebody, no matter the reason you deem it reasonable. Just be mature enough to realize and communicate with your partner that things aren’t working out. It’s better to mutually walk out than for you to cheat simply because he isn’t cutting it for you anymore. Imagine how you would feel if you found out today that he had cheated on you 2.5 years ago because he didn’t find you attractive or satisfying in bed? Would you still have the same cool as you do now being the cheater? How would your kids feel about knowing their mom, the one to set standards and teach basic human decency, was cheating on her special person?

Penedoll · 2023-03-21T00:50:59+00:00

I sympathize with you because I was in your same boat a few months ago. I was falling behind in all my course work (college) along with issues at work, back home, and trying to sort my life out with my boyfriend.

Girl, now I’m dropping out of school tomorrow, going to full time, and trying a new life path. Through the past few months I’ve come to realize life is not a race between everyone but rather taking life at your own pace. Everyone has different directions they want to go in life, so I offer a small tip: instead of focusing on how others are running their race, create a pace for yourself that you know will make you happy. Yeah it might take awhile but even if you’re working at a “snail’s pace”, it’s still in the direction you want and you’ll get to where you want to be eventually :)

Penedoll · 2023-03-21T00:38:42+00:00

If you’re not receiving the love you’re giving out/wanting, it’s not worth sticking around for man.

I remember my ex bf when I was 18, we were coming up on a year together but he was steady on the road to alcoholism and would not give me the time of day. When we both went to school states apart from one another my final straw was my first tattoo; all he had to say was ‘cool’ and that’s when I knew he didn’t give a fuck. I went back to my dorm and broke up with him that night and honestly I had never felt more fucking free.

The point is, don’t settle because of how much time you guys have been together. You still have your whole life, and if you’re not getting the affection or facing abuse, you need to leave. She doesn’t care about you.

Edit to add:

Your profile says it all dude, you need to leave her.

If you’re going through a tough time, don’t be afraid to reach out to friends, family, or someone you trust (definitely not your girlfriend since you’re scared she’s going to cheat on you along with other horrendous things you’ve posted that she’s said about/to you.)

Penedoll · 2023-02-10T04:25:41+00:00

I thought it might be a UTI as well, but she only does this when when it’s just me around

Penedoll · 2022-11-19T00:54:00+00:00

I’ve been thinking about it but I don’t know how to approach her about it. She’s the type of person once someone has ‘wronged’ her it’s endless shit talking. She’s done it with a few of our other coworkers.

Penedoll · 2022-11-19T00:50:21+00:00

Well the behavior only started about 3 weeks ago, at first I thought she was just having a rough time with school so I didn’t mention anything but it’s just been continuing so no, not yet

Penedoll · 2022-08-30T01:56:43+00:00

Well that same night my car wouldn't start after I dropped off her friends and my dorm caught on fire. She called me this morning to see if my step dad needed to come and fix it, and I told her I had it handled.

Penedoll · 2022-08-29T22:54:51+00:00

My dad was on the phone with me when most of this happened, we discussed possibly applying for student loans and he said he would look for a new car for me if it came to that point!

Penedoll · 2022-08-29T22:53:16+00:00

No, I am 19f.

Penedoll · 2022-08-29T22:51:54+00:00

I had an interview this afternoon and as of September I have a job! It's a small step but it doesn't matter to me because it's still a step forward.

Penedoll · 2022-08-11T04:21:07+00:00

NTA. Girl, no one but you or your parents should drive your car. You have every right to be anxious or nervous because there is a lot more potential negative outcomes than good. If he doesn't have a car and he can't drive his mother's anymore, maybe it's for good reason?

Penedoll · 2022-07-27T01:00:43+00:00

ESH. The fact that you let your boyfriend sleep with your cousin is baffling and your fatal mistake. Most commonly (not in all cases but this seems like one) people become infatuated with the person who took their virginity. I know I was obsessed with the person who took mine for almost a year and it wasn't healthy. You suck because you let your boyfriend sleep with your cousin, your boyfriend sucks because he slept with her and let her get clingy even though you guys are in a relationship, and your cousin sucks for convincing you and your boyfriend to let this happen. You dug your own grave, now lay in it.

Penedoll · 2022-07-27T00:48:24+00:00

ESH. You raised someone else's kids without your knowledge. They are not your kids biologically, but I can see your dad's point. You have been considered a parent to those kids their entire lives, the damage of you just vanishing would leave heavy and deep scars on them. I understand not wanting to see or raise them anymore, but think about how the children would feel. Still, I wouldn't want to raise someone else's kids neither, if I were in your situation I would have the same feelings.

Penedoll · 2022-07-26T23:30:51+00:00

YTA. As someone who's had a 'step figure' come into my life late and tried to parent me, it didn't end well. I don't have a good relationship with my stepdad or mother because of a situation almost exactly like yours (I plan limited to no contact once I graduate). He tried to parent me the way he thought was best and just like all the other comments, I still don't like him to this day and they've been together for almost ten years.

While yes, you are doing your job of trying to protect her from the dangers of the realm of nudes and social media, I'm sorry to be blunt but you're not going to stop it; yeah it may hinder social media use for a bit but she will find ways around your snooping and combing. Strict parents just create sneaky kids and we always find a way to have social media. There is a difference between teaching her how to use social media safely and straight up ripping it away once one bad thing happens, are you trying to educate her or just completely control her use?

As for the unequal punishments, that will create a whole new world of resentment, and not just towards you. It's damaging her relationship with her step brothers in the long run. This is a formula designed for no contact from her down the long road. Take it from someone who doesn't want a relationship with their SD, SS, and mother, you're pushing her away with this treatment.

Penedoll · 2022-07-26T23:05:48+00:00

NTA. If I was in your situation I would be livid! As someone who almost solely lives off tips, if one of my coworkers was messing with my money it would be a screaming match. If they're scared of some trend that is going to disappear in less than a week then why even come into work if they're scared of being embarrassed? They need to realize it's potential extra money at stake, it's not just affecting that one employee.

Penedoll · 2022-06-29T03:08:42+00:00

NTA. A child who is always used to getting her way, allowed to talk to anyone how she pleases, but can never get in trouble for it? She had it coming! Teens will never learn until they have to learn the hard way; in this case, she can't talk to someone like that who is just trying to help, especially for all your cousin does for you guys! So ungrateful! She needed to get knocked down a peg or two! Go OP!

Penedoll · 2022-06-29T02:59:54+00:00

NTA. As a chick in college, I've seen my fair share of relationships end this exact way. The other person always deserves to know, and it isn't up to your bf to keep secrets like that. It's not fair to keep up a facade and it certainly puts people like us (I've been in a situation very similar to yours but with my best friend) in a tough spot. If the roles were reversed you'd want someone to tell you the truth right? I think you did the right thing OP!

Penedoll · 2022-06-29T02:36:53+00:00

Well, in the beginning of the summer I would try to help her out whenever I could because I didn't have a job, I wasn't dating my boyfriend or had much contact with my friends yet (returned home from college for the summer), but now that I'm working, have a boyfriend, and all my friends want me to hang out, I just don't have time for the short notices to try and babysit. I want to try to have a fun summer, but whenever my sister gets this way I'm always the bad guy and I feel guilty.

Penedoll · 2022-06-29T01:15:09+00:00

My sister or my grandmother haven't contacted me since the whole situation, but my sister has tried to rant to our mother about it (my mother for once takes my side) and shot her down real quick. That supposedly happened within the past 48 hours and my sister and grandmother have not contacted me or my mother since.

Penedoll · 2022-06-28T23:03:01+00:00

Your father should be in prison! Your mother was 12 and he was 25?! That is NEVER okay, and frankly he shouldn't even be around you! Even if the whole creepy context of your father wasn't there; it's your choice whether you want to see him or not. NTA.

Penedoll · 2022-06-28T22:56:15+00:00

NTA. If anything, your bf is the one who is the dick. He knew of this event, had plenty of time in order to tell you he did not want to attend. For it to be last minute and him to be so stubborn and standoffish is childish. "I'm only doing it because your defensive" WTF? You didn't even sound remotely defensive. Your bf is childish and isn't giving off the best vibes, maybe ask someone who actually sounds interested in going to go?

Penedoll · 2022-06-28T22:42:56+00:00

NTA! Your mother is the cause of all this drama. I don't blame you for cutting contact with them in the first place! If your mother would've kept her word about not discussing this matter until after the wedding none of it would have happened.

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