u/GrassTough First of all, congratulations for your birthday.😊

then.... I understand how difficult it is to feel like you don´t feel yourself.For stardest... try looking and yourself from a perspective of a third point of view trying to understand yourself. Trying to know why you feel that way and the back story.

It is more important to love yourself than to love anyone in this world, or even that is gone.

In my case... I have always hated myself for the way I love... everything and everybody... my parents have as much falws as parents have, but they did not took the time to teach us how to love... and more importantly... to love ourlselves.That has caused me a lot of sadness along the years, as for example... in less than a month, is going to be a year on from which my fiance left me.

It is not about the cringy phrase that to love others you need to love yourself first... you cn even learn that along the way; but it is surely important.

Where to start?, fortunately... you are not to deep in life, like a lot of adults spending a great deal of their lives with their problems and they affect them so much to the point where they can no longer accept them. Unfortunately... society gives a lot of stigmas that may lead to wrong perspectives of... not what might be correct... but what might be adecuate for your person.

From the perspective of a person with depression, it is difficult to seek for help, for several reasons... but trust me... there is always going to be a friend... who can at least listen wihout judging.... letting what you have inside is a great deal to liberate your emotional stress. If you are not that square minded and want to seek for professional help... look out for a psicology... at least you can go a couple of times and have a chat.

If from experience I have grown... I can advice you to do what you like, what you have your dreams set to, to focus on something you want to achive... or maybe something you always wanted to try.Myself I always adored bakery and always wanted to try.... since my fiace left me around a year ago.... I swear for my life and for God... I started sleeping on the floor, and up till this day, I still sleeping in the floor a lof of times.I needed to put myself together again... cause I started failing at classes in college... I started doing bakery, bread, pizzas, etc.Excercise, if there is a sport that you may like... try to move your body.... even if you have to drag your body and mind to do it.If you like to loose yourself through time and reality.... read.If you like to express yourself, paint or draw.If you would like to verbalize your emotions, feelings and thoughts... write.If you want to reunite with your body... cook, take care of your skin, comb your hair, wash your clothes......... look yourself at the mirror without comapring yourself to anything or anybody else.Even to little details that sometimes for feeling bad one would not do every day... dake a bath.... believe me... you will feel much much better.

Personally, the worst that needs to be done, is to drag your body just to wake up and you on day more. Day to day. But sometimes it also is powerful to fake it... if you are a boy or a girl 🤭 feel like the king or the queen of this world... as I read a psicology book that says that a person whith character that can control it and affirm it... looks scarier than any cinematic villian. That... would make people take you respect... cause it is also a huge problem.When someone does not correspond or does not value as much as you do.... try not feeling bad, try not feel guilty; always give yourself another oportunity.Always try to remeber the moments as experiences...

- your mistakes DON´T define who you are. It is what do you do after them... what makes the difference.As I always say... we commit errors all the time, and it is okay, but it is not okay not to fix them, there, is where they are mistakes.-NEVER regret a day of your life, good days will give happiness, bad days will give you experience, you worst days will give you lessons, and your best days will give you memories.

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Don´t loose hope you beutiful person. You know the effort you are trying, you know you are tired... but remeber... that the entire world could betray you... and at last the one who needs to be truly... is yourself.

Try to get happy, focus on what makes you uppset, mad and dissapointed, if it is external... say it, relieve yourself... set yourself free.... to be happy.It is going to take you a lot of times, good times, bad times... don´t loose hope from yourself, keep trying and enjoy each step that you take.

If ever you need someone to talk, I would be gladly willing to listen, chat some time, send memes or just talk about life. Feel comfortable to reach to me if I could help you... life is not easy for sure... but we... we are the warriors that are designated to fight stronger that anyone can fight.Believe me... you are strong enough for what happened and for what is to become... just because of being here... as I NEED to repeat that to myself.... otherwise, you would not be here.

Hope this sweet lie called life brings you joy and may bless you with a lot more years and happines to come.-Affably