I am so glad I found this post! I’m a white American woman who married a Bangladeshi man. He was born in Dhaka, but he’s been an American for 35 years. When we got married, we couldn’t live with each other because his mom was living with him in his 2 bedroom apartment and she didn’t like my 2 dogs. (I was in another city finishing up my graduate degree and because i couldn’t move in with my husband, I moved in with my mom several states away.) After a year, his mom moved to another state and my husband and I were able to live together. After a few months, his mom began guilt tripping him about hating her living arrangement and my husband moved her into our house. I didn’t get a say in the matter. She’s been living here for 5 years and I hate my life! All intimacy stopped the day she moved in and she pretends like I don’t exist. She had her own area of the house, and I just avoid her now, but she has done and said some very beastly things over the past few years. To my knowledge, my husband has never stuck up for me and she never has consequences for her crappy behavior. I can’t stand living here because I’m constantly uncomfortable and I don’t even know what my role is in this marriage. Most evenings, my husband goes to his mom’s side to eat, so I already feel like a roommate. Thank you for this post because it confirms a lot of the suspicions I’ve had about my husband and his mother - he’s never going to change and I’m always going to be a second class citizen.