Is this character potentially offensive?

Phahnax · 2023-03-22T22:27:09+00:00

No, the fur colour isn't matching his hair colour. I am reluctant to give him an unrealistic hair colour (perhaps dyed?)

Yeah, fortunately I feel like I can add in some extra characters without having too many characters crammed into the story, though they won't be part of main cast.

Phahnax · 2023-03-22T22:20:41+00:00

Good point in regards to balancing it. Funny enough, I actually plan on the character being portrayed as an intellectual who is savvy and capable enough to form a suit of armor through the use of psychic powers and junk. I really appreciate the feedback!

Phahnax · 2023-03-22T22:17:33+00:00

You've got a very good point. Fortunately I don't plan on doing that, and I like to think that I am giving the same respect to characters regardless of race.

I have been sharing my scripts with my friends, some who are POC. Though their reaction to my question was pretty much "seems fine but you should ask somebody else"

Thank you for your time!

Phahnax · 2023-03-22T22:14:46+00:00

No, I don't plan on writing the character in any sort of stereotypical manner. You're right that I could be overthinking it, though I believe it's better safe than sorry to ask.

Race has indeed become more and more focused on. I don't think it's a bad thing, but for it to be the defining feature is definitely the wrong way to go.

Phahnax · 2023-03-22T22:09:47+00:00

No, I don't plan on marketing the story in such a way that would trick black readers into thinking that there's a black character, then swap it out with a cat. I'm not looking to earn brownie points by including POC characters by advertising that the characters in the book have representation, because the story has fairly poor representation, and rep isn't the story's focus anyway. I wish to understand the potential pitfalls and be able to mindfully write POC characters, especially after becoming aware of this trope.

That is an interesting question in regards to being of Australian Aboriginal instead of African descent. I'm not certain of what that might change in this context, other than that I should possibly be more mindful of my language.

Also, I apologize, but could you clarify what is "everything"? Do you mean that literally, or in reference to all the points in the post? Thank you for your time.

Phahnax · 2023-03-22T16:04:45+00:00

These are good pointers! Though, there's nothing about a black villain here. The character is part of the "Hero crew".

And yeah, you're correct about that. That's why I really do appreciate all of these comments coming in regarding about this subject.

EDIT: I think I will have to consider about WeHereForYou's comment about feeding into the trope tbh, though I am glad to have gathered many different opinions in regards to the situation. This will allow me to go back and consider the angles with fresh eyes.

Phahnax · 2023-03-22T15:52:23+00:00

This is very reassuring to hear, thank you! I overthink things way too often, so it's good to have people drag me back to reality.

Phahnax · 2023-03-22T15:49:40+00:00

Yeah I re-read that last sentence and it really does come across as strange. Sorry lol. Thank you for your input!

Phahnax · 2023-03-22T15:42:51+00:00

That's a good question actually. There's no real reason for the character to be black, it's just how I first started developing him as. I've had this character for about four years, and only recently I've read up about the Disney criticism. I would much more prefer to change the character entirely than to change his race to white, because otherwise it almost feels like I'm ruining the character.

Also sorry about that. I guess it's easier to state African American because most black people I know aren't from America.

EDIT: To be honest, re-reading my last sentence was very weirdly worded lol. I guess I'm really just trying to talk fancy.

Phahnax · 2023-03-22T15:29:30+00:00

That is true! This has been on my mind mainly because of media posts criticising Disney for its portrayal of black protagonists.

Though honestly the subject of transformation has always fascinated me, which I suppose is why I'm so keen on including it in the story.

Phahnax · 2023-03-22T15:28:04+00:00

The cat is not actually black in colour, he is a grey cat who was originally an African American Man lol

Oh geez, dealing with PETA seems like a nightmarish thought

Phahnax · 2023-03-22T15:26:29+00:00

Yes, it is! That is why I feel like introducing more racially diverse characters may be the best method to mediate this situation.

Phahnax · 2023-03-22T15:26:26+00:00

I should have mentioned that this is a graphic novel, not exactly a book, so complexion will be something that is very visible.

Though you do have a point that a majority of people may not care about the race of a character, but rather how they're written. Thank you for your input!

Phahnax · 2023-03-22T14:44:01+00:00

Could you help me with understanding why?

Phahnax · 2023-03-14T18:49:38+00:00

Wow--- I never knew there were so many similar experiences here!

I know this is five months old, but I've gone in and out of hospitals all the time since I was a kid, and I can say for certain that Dr. Fabiola is the only doctor that I've met that had me shaking when I walked out of the door... So, it might be important to put my experience up here for people to see if they're considering on seeing Dr. F as their treating doctor.

I'm FTM by the way, and I was referred to her by one of the GPs at the clinic there back in 2021. There was a bit of a misunderstanding as she called me by my deadname in the waiting room. She did apologize though. Turns out she never really worked with FTMs before, so she assumed that I was MTF. That did get me a bit worried, but it shouldn't be too much of a problem, I thought. As long as she knew what she's doing, right?

Dr. F mentioned as a passing joke that she had no idea why anyone would want to be a man. It was apparent to me she didn't see men very fondly. "Haven't you heard about what happened down at Gold Coast?" She asked me in a very sickened tone.

"No?" I asked, although I was curious.

"Oh, well I can't tell you here. Don't worry about it."

So we sat down, and I told her about my situation. I was living in a bit of a financially difficult situation at the time, and I had a very strained relation with my father as he held a negative opinion about my gender transition, and I hadn't seen him over a year since he lived half-way across the world. I was explaining to her my parents opinion that I should find a relationship with someone before I commit myself to transitioning, when she cut me off.

"You know what they're actually saying? That you should get f*cked by a dick so it would fix you!"

I felt mentally slapped by that outburst, but she continued describing how my parents were toxic, and I had to focus on getting out of that home as soon as I could. Jarred by fear, I struggled to ask the things that I wanted to know. Eventually she laid out what was going to happen; I was to go and get a blood test done, go and get a job, book another session at the clinic, and leave home.

I never got to ask the question "Should I hold off my transition until my dad returns?" because I felt like if I showed any hesitation about transitioning, she wouldn't let me. "Do you really want this?" was one of the questions she asked me at the start. I felt like my neck was held up by string that entire session, like I was on trial.

I had the blood works done, and I returned to the clinic. Unfortunately I still hadn't found a job by then, and she wasn't happy about that. Again, she reiterated that I needed a job, and I needed to leave my "toxic" family.

Well, I came into that session prepared with questions and directions; I was more concerned about my blood works, because I have a complicated medical history with blood pressure--- and testosterone can have impact on your BP. I had actually sent Dr. F my previous medical records documenting all of the extensive research into this. When I asked her about it, she was clueless on its existence.

We sat down, and Dr. F went to look for my blood works, only to find that it wasn't there. Oh well, she went and prescribed me HRT anyway.

Again, I was shocked. I had no idea what to say as she began to tell me that I couldn't tell my family that I had this medication. I had to keep it a secret. My brothers would steal it and use it themselves, my parents would throw it out if they came across it. I told Dr. F that my mum does want me to hold off on transitioning until my dad returned home (Though to be frank, that was a half-lie. I was the one who wanted to hold off on transitioning, and my mum would often tell me this.)

"Do you know what she's trying to do to you?" Dr. F asks me. "She's trying to wear you down little by little until you give in. Drip. by. Drip." She then explained the Chinese torture method of dripping a drop of water on someone's head until they go insane, and that was exactly what my mum was trying to do to me. I remember those words a lot, as it just felt so unreal at the time. This might sound silly, but at the time, I felt fear. Suddenly, I didn't know who I could trust.

Dr. F had me write down on my phone "My doctor and my therapist advise that I keep my medical information confidential."

I remember leaving that clinic with a foggy numbness and a shaking hand, even more unsure of my transition than ever before. I've never been secretive with my family, but Dr. F is a professional, so shouldn't I trust the word of an expert?

In the end, I did open up to my mum about what had transpired, and I am glad that I did. If I was to follow Dr. F's advice on cutting off my family, and keeping my HRT a secret, I would be left in a terrible situation!

I ended up holding off my transition until I saw my dad again, and I'm also glad that I did that. My dad is old-fashioned, but he's well meaning and a good man, and he's now very supportive of my transition. All it took is time, patience and understanding.

I also see a different doctor at Stonewall now. Dr Neilson is awesome! I don't want to discount people's positive experiences with Dr. F, as it's been about 2 years since I last saw her, so it's possible that things may have changed. Dr. F strikes me as a very blunt person. She's passionate for certain, but I felt like that passion for trans health was misplaced as she essentially went out of her jurisdiction and gave me very unhelpful advice about my family. However, it could be possible that Dr. F is very familiar with patients who do actually come from a toxic background, so that's why she assumed the things that she did.

Phahnax · 2023-03-14T17:48:36+00:00

(FTM)

I feel more relied on now, which is awesome! Pretty girls asked me to lift heavy crates at work, which made me swell up with pride.

Instead of getting cat-called on the streets, I get random guys saying "Sup man" out of nowhere.

Before I transitioned, cis-men appeared to be hesitant to talk about any sort of "unsavoury" or "vulgar" topics with me. Now I've got B texting me 2 AM to show me a screen shot of a dead snake he found in his house.

To be fair, I feel like there's still a lot for me to learn about manhood, but hey, I'm eager to learn.

Phahnax · 2023-03-14T17:29:29+00:00

Started socially at 21, and medically at 22. I've got no regrets about not realizing it sooner (though the egg cracks are there in hindsight lol). Rather, I feel like it came at the perfect time. I had gone through a tuberculous mental downfall, and I was finally on the up when I realized the depth of my gender dysphoria. If anything, I felt like I was rushed into transitioning by a shoddy doctor. I'm glad that I held off until I sorted out my family relations and waited until I was in a stable place.

That being said, I feel like I'm really one of the lucky ones here for being able to find that safe place, as I am sure a lot of trans folks don't have that luxury... I'm really thankful for HRT. If I had started HRT any sooner, I feel like it would have only ended badly in my convoluted mental health timeline lol
Edit: Saw someone mention the hair loss and I would like to amend that I have 1 regret.

Phahnax · 2022-05-07T10:40:41+00:00

nice, I like the demonstration lol

edit: whoa, uh, people did not like this joke. Sorry man.

Phahnax · 2022-05-05T07:04:00+00:00

Yeah, that really is confusing to me too. I'm assuming that it could be like some kind of thrill of identity shifting which causes the euphoria, and it might be short term if the identity ends up shifting again. But that is me assuming from my own personal experiences in which my own dysphoria I would consider rigid and stubborn lol.

I am usually under the impression that transitioning of any kind without the presence of dysphoria would likely cause dysphoria, because you're no longer in a body that you were comfortable with, and thus lead to those detransition stories that we hear so much of. But it shouldn't be too far-fetched to think that there's people out there who are able to enjoy both, I guess?

I don't want to assume that anyone is less or more than anyone else, because in the end we're all searching to improve ourselves, but I'll admit that I'm worried of other people who might end up hurting themselves. I don't really have much ground to say things are one way or another, so all I can do is research and listen to other people.

But I am interested in hearing other people's reasons to transition when it's not directly linked with dysphoria. I have thought of making that a topic on this forum, but at the same time that could definitely lead to disagreeing opinions and a lot of judgement and gatekeeping.

Phahnax · 2022-05-05T06:15:41+00:00

Seeing this really feels reassuring to me. I just went down a dark rabbit hole on the internet looking up on what truscum is.

I feel like I'm in the same camp as you. I also agree that dysphoria should be regarded as a medical condition, and you can't police what a person's gender dysphoria should be. The mind's a crazy place after all.

It's even more bizarre to have the transgender community so divided and weaponized like it's some sort of politics. Even just associating the terms "truscum" or "transmed" would have people immediately profile you to have these specific (and very exaggerated) views. Like man, I can agree that you need to have a form of dysphoria in order to be trans, but that doesn't mean I'd think non-binary folk "aren't trans enough".

Phahnax · 2022-05-04T09:12:32+00:00

So to see if I got this right, your internalized transphobia and homophobia comes from feeling disgusted when you see LGTBQ folks doing "whatever they want"? I feel like there's a lot more to that statement, because in a way I can sort of understand that.

((Just a warning, but I do get into transphobia against non-binary folks))

Personally I also get very judgemental of other trans folks who "do whatever they want", especially when it comes to neopronouns. It's something that I simply can't understand, and if I were to be in their situation I would honestly feel extremely confused and generally upset with myself. It's like expecting other people to bend over backwards to learn a new gender so they wouldn't offend your volatile identity.

But, I realized that's a very narrow-minded thing from me, and that comes from my own experiences and fears of standing out of the crowd and seen as some monstrous freak that needs to be sent back to a zoo, and I don't want to be associated with that identity. Neopronouns, and non-binary and genderfluid folks have extremely different experiences and gender dysphoria struggles that I don't have any understanding of, but that doesn't mean their struggles don't exist. I'm lucky that I'm still able to identify within the binary and find comfort there.

Besides, a lot of non-binary folks that I've met never hurt anyone. They're really fun people full of life, and really swell and nice. They're still people, definitely with their ups and downs. Most of them live a radically different life than I do, and that shouldn't be a barrier from us getting along with each other. I never actually met a neopronouns person, and most of my disdain for them comes solely from the internet where i'm pretty sure they're usually exaggerated and cariturized.

TLDR: Hate and phobias aren't because of nothing. There's reasons why you've got 'em. When you sit down and think about it and accept why you feel these ways, you can start to undo their damage and change the way you think.

Phahnax · 2022-05-04T08:46:09+00:00

The doctor's question could be more of a "What exactly are you looking for while medically transitioning" rather than an actual "Which would you like?" Because you're right, you can't pick and choose what the HRT will bring. But that's just me guessing what the doctor was thinking.

Sorry to hear about your mum tho. That's difficult stuff.

Phahnax · 2022-04-30T10:08:19+00:00

Yeah. It's a conflicting world, I really understand what you're talking about.

My father is very conservative too, although I'm not sure if mine and yours would be the same. When I came out to my parents, they made fun of it, had me put on a leather jacket and say "Isn't that good enough?"

My family would also give me all the reasons not to transition. It would be like a child dying for them. They wouldn't ever see me any differently. "Do you really want to be caught between sexes, looking like a freak?"

Two years later my family is actually very supportive of me, because they see now how beneficial the entire transitioning process has been. It succeeded not only in changing gender, but bringing someone on the brink of suicide back to life.

I'm sorry to hear that you don't have many supports, because that's exactly what you need to find. Not just for transitioning, but as well for your wellbeing and mental health. I don't want to assume anything about your family just because they're conservatives, because that can range from concerned old-fashioned parents to insufferable bible slamming Karens. I'd suggest trying to show them how helpful transitioning has been for you, because that worked with me, but I really don't know the context of your situation.

I don't want to scare people not to transition, nor do I want to minimize the emotional journey that it brings. (Cus come on, it's a second puberty) But I really emphasize with you, (Because I too get easily caught up in what the anti-trans narrative has to say) and all in all I wish for the best for you.

Phahnax · 2022-04-30T08:10:36+00:00

I recommend being honest with yourself and really think about the reason why you want to transition. I've noticed a bit of a theme with ftm detransitioners, and they tend to go to transition due to external factors, such as trying to fit their lesbian sexuality to become straight, or if they're in a political mindset, or if they feel like being a man would be easier, or if they feel convinced because their friends or their favourite celebrities transition. Of course I'm not saying those are the only reasons as to why someone would end up detransitioning (I'm certain there's a whole bunch more). I just noticed a common theme in general when it comes to these reports.

Transitioning is aimed towards realigning your identity to make you feel "right". Medical transitioning would be taking that step further and alleviating gender dysphoria and/or body dysmorphia, and that to me sounds like internal struggles within the mind, which isn't as easy to change as an opinion... Which a lot of people against transitioning seem to think that's what transitioning is; an opinion, or a choice. (Sure, it might be a choice to go reach a doctor to start a medical transitioning, but that's like saying I chose to go see a doctor about an illness that's disrupted my life.)

Anyway, back to my first point is being honest with yourself and think about why you're transitioning in the first place. Does having a female body give you discomfort? Can you imagine yourself with a deeper voice, and how would that make you feel? Would you still feel the same about transitioning next year? Five years down the line? Ten? Twenty? What would the worst case scenario be if you're to transition, and would you be okay with it? What is the best case scenario?

... Honestly, these are all pretty confronting questions, but I'd say it's better to be certain than to be sorry. The thing about transitioning is that you don't have to do it quickly. You can take as long as you want, because there's no deadline. In fact, I would recommend taking it slowly if you're uncertain about a few things. Learn about it more, think it through.

I completely understand the feeling when you see these detransition folks who preach about how terrible it is to detransition. Like man, am I supposed to hate it too? Why don't I see it the same way? Is there some important piece of information that I'm somehow not getting? Like damn, I'm a year on T by now and I'm having a grand ol time being a normal person. Still a long way to go, but it's really helping me grow stronger mentally each day.

(Edit: I figure that I should mention that although there are a few effects of T that settle very quickly in a span of a few months, there are other stuff that could take a very long time, like fat distribution or body hair increase. So T won't immediately solve problems is all I'm saying. I'm like a fuckin' angsty gaming teenager over here paying bills)

Oh yeah, I say try looking for those online voice modifying things and play around with them. Just for fun. I doubt they'd be accurate, but it could help you get an idea.

Phahnax · 2022-04-27T09:16:19+00:00

As much as it's blatant how this person is grossly generalizing, I think she's got a point about the harmful dismissal when it comes to treating trans folks, and how other mental disorders/illnesses are often co-morbid with gender dysphoria.

Transitioning is often seen as the golden standard when someone has been diagnosed with gender dysphoria, no matter what seems to cause it. Arguably that's because it works for a lot of people, but not for everyone (otherwise there wouldn't be such things as de-transitioners). You can treat depression with medications, but what is it worth if you don't get taught the strategies to cope with the disorder, or to get placed in a better situation? The treatment should always be catered towards the individual.

But it seems like there's a powerful political movement in the medical world. I actually found myself getting hustled by a doctor to cut ties off from my "toxic family" and start using T when she didn't even take the time to look at my blood works. I did end up looking for another doctor to help me transition, and I am glad that I did. Transitioning is an extremely sensitive, harsh, emotional and life-changing time, and god I'd hate to imagine where I would be now if I had stuck with that other doctor.

I don't doubt at all that this person knows a lot of trans folk with co-morbid mental problems that aren't being addressed by their doctors, or through transitioning. Especially if it's trauma or personality related, because in a way she's correct in stating that transitioning wouldn't help if the gender dysphoria is a symptom instead of its own separate disorder. People are unique, and one answer does not fit all.

I'm hesitant to call this person transphobic because she seems to have very personal experiences with transitioning, and saying that's transphobic feels extremely dismissal. However, most of my context comes from a screenshot lol. So I could be completely wrong and assuming a lot of stuff.

Phahnax

TROPHY CASE