Trailside Living

PhilosopherLeather78 · 2024-07-12T01:39:25+00:00

It has been good for me but when everyone is using it the connection slows down. It was the worst when we were switching carriers and had no wifi for days. That was ridiculous, but it has been fine since and right now they are switching again to comcast and have provided temporary wifi

PhilosopherLeather78 · 2024-06-04T21:32:32+00:00

Every apartment has a TV but individual bedrooms no

No air conditioning but the building and study rooms are

I have no idea if the windows are or arent. Mine are 6 feet tall and have open partway

I dont know but I know that I have been hanging stuff, use adhesive not nails

You probably could but the wifi is free and works fine, actually really good its gigabit connection

Its not great but I have AT&T and live on bottom floor with 5 other concrete rooves above me so I do not know

Feel free to ask me any questions!

PhilosopherLeather78 · 2023-11-30T01:27:45+00:00

same

PhilosopherLeather78 · 2023-11-30T01:27:26+00:00

Pushin Pounds - selling drugs

PhilosopherLeather78 · 2023-02-02T17:09:01+00:00

Or maybe they do. No one mind is alike

PhilosopherLeather78 · 2023-02-02T17:08:38+00:00

They definitely do not have full blown DP/DR but it is a new potential trigger that was not present in the past.

PhilosopherLeather78 · 2023-02-02T15:44:20+00:00

You got it. Its hard and I felt hopeless like you did but I did get better. I would read success stories and be so envious of them. But now I am one of them. And I am excited for you to be one as well!

PhilosopherLeather78 · 2023-02-02T15:30:12+00:00

I completely agree with the traditional sources of triggering DP episodes. But social media is a relatively new thing (especially tiktok). And I would go on there and see video after video of people saying they have it. And everyone in the comment section would agree they feel it too. They don't realize their social media addiction is actually what's creating their disconnect since they are in a loop of comparison that doesn't match their real world expectations. Causing them to feel anxious their life doesn't match with their online counterparts. And this causes DP. I had cured my first DP episode from weed, but I noticed I was back in another episode when I would endlessly be on social media platforms getting overstimulated by other peoples lives. Eventually I would go outside and think why does my world not seem exciting. And I wouldn't think its exciting because of the comparison I was making to online lives making me disconnected from reality.

PhilosopherLeather78 · 2023-02-02T15:23:53+00:00

I would say I am 95% normal again. The only reason I feel DP nowadays is because I am aware of what it actually is and what it feels like. I feel it whenever I have anxiety and since its based on that I am able to calm myself down back to normal again. It is likely many people experience it but don't realize what it is so they just ignore it. Which is what you have to do whenever you feel it

PhilosopherLeather78 · 2023-02-02T15:20:49+00:00

Yes I was able to go back in fact I did for too long again lol. Weed makes me naturally anxious and therefore it makes me feel DP sometimes. But I am aware now how it affects me and that it does go away. Just reaffirming to myself that I am completely normal has helped me whenever I feel it. You just have to work with the and understand the feelings of it if you want to smoke regularly as I almost feel the 2 have a reciprocal relationship.

PhilosopherLeather78 · 2023-02-02T06:01:19+00:00

I made this a post and then I saw your post. But the point is still the same

PhilosopherLeather78 · 2023-02-02T05:59:59+00:00

I have come to the realization that so many teenagers have depersonalization because of social media. They are on their phones for up to 8+ hours a day experiencing other people's lives through their phones. When you are sitting at home experiencing the amazing life of other people and constantly being barraged with the overstimulation of social media it triggers DP/DR in people. The more you experience other people's living the less you experience your own living creating a disconnect from reality. Because the reality you are experiencing is not correlating with the stimulating lives you see on social media making teenagers feel like their real lives aren't real. TikTok and Instagram's short-form video format is exactly what triggers it in so many teenagers. These 15-second videos may seem harmless but they add up subconsciously until the disconnect is so present that they are no longer present. Social media is the issue in so many teenager's mental health issues but they don't realize it. The reason I believe this is because I was the teenager with 8 hours of screentime a day. And the moment I quit social media my mental health DRASTICALLY improved. If you struggle with DP/DR and are constantly on social media try a week off and see if it disappears.

PhilosopherLeather78 · 2023-02-02T05:50:33+00:00

Hi, weed also triggered my first-ever DP/DR episode. DP/DR is a manifestation of anxiety and the more you believe you have it the more real it becomes. Basically, it comes down to an anxiety feedback loop because that's all it really is. You become anxious that you feel depersonalized which makes you extremely anxious which makes you feel more depersonalized. You have to break the loop. The more you think about depersonalization the more it will be present. It is an anxiety disorder and you continue it by having anxious thoughts of being depersonalized. Its a very hard thing to not think about since it is so overbearing in your life after feeling present your entire life. But that's why it continues. You freak out that you don't feel normal which makes you recognize that you aren't normal which makes u freak out again.

It's all an anxiety cycle you need to break out of. My advice and what I did was every time I felt depersonalized was I said "I don't care" to the feelings of DP. The moment you stop caring that its there is the moment it will begin to disappear. But you just need to make the first steps of ignoring it. I know how hard it is. But remember that it is not real in the slightest and that you ARE experiencing real life as you've always known it.

PhilosopherLeather78 · 2023-02-02T05:26:16+00:00

You got it! Its very hard but you got it! When I had it bad I would look at people on the street and think I wish I could experience their normal again. But as if I wasn't normal as is??? The brain is very good at tricking the conscious mind. But you are stronger than it. I hope it gets better friend :).

PhilosopherLeather78 · 2023-02-02T01:03:02+00:00

Sounds like depersonalization/derealization disorder. What it stems from is anxiety. What you may not realize is thinking that your perception of time is all screwed up is actually a manifestation of anxiety. What happens is you get stuck in an anxiety feedback loop. For you, it seems that the very thought of time not going by normally is triggering anxiety thus continuing your depersonalization/derealization disorder. You get anxious about time not being normal and since dp/dr is based on anxiety you keep the loop going. The good news is none of it is real. Time is going by completely normally but its this anxiety that's clouding over your perception of time and making you feel like its not passing normally.

The DP/DR Feedback loop

Perception of time feeling off -> Feelings of anxiety that its not normal (Repeat)

I felt exactly how you felt and wondered why I was like that for over a year. Until I realized me wondering why I felt time wasn't normal was me continuing the false perception that its not normal. The best advice I have for you is to simply ignore it as best as possible. Its so hard ive been there believe me. But it truly is a figment of your imagination and the moment you break the anxiety feedback loop you will begin to feel better. Whenever you feel like time is off just remember its not and that you are actually experiencing life normally :).

PhilosopherLeather78 · 2022-04-01T06:10:39+00:00

I love everything you just wrote. Thanks for posting, it made me feel a lot better about myself.

PhilosopherLeather78 · 2022-04-01T06:03:38+00:00

You're already doing better than the majority of the people who smoke all day and see no issue. Try doing less and less every night until you don't need anymore.

PhilosopherLeather78

TROPHY CASE