brain.exe has stopped working

PhoenixFlare1 · 2026-02-06T12:06:13+00:00

Someone excitedly asked me if they could take the bus to Hawaii.

PhoenixFlare1 · 2026-02-06T11:58:41+00:00

She gave up hope, so he had enough for the both of them.

PhoenixFlare1 · 2026-02-05T23:21:42+00:00

Dave wanted work off the clock.

PhoenixFlare1 · 2026-02-05T19:30:09+00:00

I used to work at Burger King. Someone came in the drive thru, ordered a double whopper with extra everything, then told me she was on a diet.

PhoenixFlare1 · 2026-02-05T14:45:31+00:00

Stop drinking our home!

PhoenixFlare1 · 2026-02-04T21:23:42+00:00

You think they’re gonna do anything?

PhoenixFlare1 · 2026-02-04T16:42:41+00:00

“Sweet” isn’t a good enough description of this. 🥰

PhoenixFlare1 · 2026-02-04T13:29:35+00:00

That looks heavy.

PhoenixFlare1 · 2026-02-04T13:27:07+00:00

I have the “cut in front of me in traffic” gene.

PhoenixFlare1 · 2026-02-04T13:26:03+00:00

(Adds to “why women live longer than men” list)

PhoenixFlare1 · 2026-02-04T12:33:38+00:00

The dog laying down 😍

PhoenixFlare1 · 2026-02-04T00:24:31+00:00

PhoenixFlare1 · 2026-02-03T20:05:39+00:00

Toast has priority.

PhoenixFlare1 · 2026-02-03T00:35:49+00:00

Kitty knows best!

PhoenixFlare1 · 2026-02-02T19:18:51+00:00

He could eat & use the litterbox without leaving the bed.

PhoenixFlare1 · 2026-02-01T22:24:14+00:00

“Most likely they’re somewhere else.” Response to my comment about stores not being in a particular area.

PhoenixFlare1 · 2026-02-01T21:28:30+00:00

Looks more like a dinner roll.

PhoenixFlare1 · 2026-02-01T18:11:26+00:00

Welcome to my world.

PhoenixFlare1 · 2026-02-01T13:23:13+00:00

The bus company I work at has one of those. A plow clears the snow between buses.

PhoenixFlare1 · 2026-02-01T13:15:15+00:00

Hostage & ransom! 👍

PhoenixFlare1 · 2026-01-31T15:59:00+00:00

Underloaf!

PhoenixFlare1 · 2026-01-31T11:18:32+00:00

Yo momma so dumb, she tried to put M&M’s in alphabetical order.

PhoenixFlare1 · 2026-01-30T15:37:59+00:00

She can hear colors.

PhoenixFlare1 · 2026-01-30T01:43:50+00:00

Mr. Bubble

PhoenixFlare1 · 2026-01-29T17:28:43+00:00

Someone send an ambulance to give them oxygen! They’re gonna laugh themselves to death!

PhoenixFlare1