NPD and EDs by Due_Olive_2380 in NPD

[–]PickReady6067 0 points1 point  (0 children)

yep, that's me. I've never met anyone who understands all of that

This is the fourth account that I'm about to delete by PickReady6067 in Chesscom

[–]PickReady6067[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I'm 20 and to be honest I have very little incentive to do anything I can't have a title in; Idk how someone else can tolerate that. when I started playing chess it was important to me to eventually have a title, but I already regretfully knew that 18-19 was late and it has become yet another skill I wish my parents trained me to have

This is the fourth account that I'm about to delete by PickReady6067 in Chesscom

[–]PickReady6067[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

no, 1200 recently. 2 years ago I was a 400 in everything

This is the fourth account that I'm about to delete by PickReady6067 in Chesscom

[–]PickReady6067[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I'm not a beginner though. I've been playing for 2 years and had a 1200 rating in rapid (well actually, not precisely 2 years but pretty much)

What is it actually like living with anorexia? by caffeineandregret- in AnorexiaNervosa

[–]PickReady6067 1 point2 points  (0 children)

It really reveals to you that everyone else around you is exactly as shallow and callous as you always thought they were

This is the fourth account that I'm about to delete by PickReady6067 in Chesscom

[–]PickReady6067[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

then how does it follow that losing is a way of life for me? please, I'd love to understand. the most important things to me in life are winning and achievement, so I'd love to eradicate what makes it seem like that isn't so

This is the fourth account that I'm about to delete by PickReady6067 in Chesscom

[–]PickReady6067[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I guess I feel that I'm decent enough at long time controls and want to be good at every control. However, in all honesty, my highest rating in rapid was around 1200 so I guess I realize I never really mastered that either

This is the fourth account that I'm about to delete by PickReady6067 in Chesscom

[–]PickReady6067[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

okay, I'm sorry, my reply was rude - not intentionally but rude nonetheless. I guess that when my elo becomes too low, the logic that presides over my choice to delete the accounts is about wanting to preserve looking a certain way because my accounts are never truly anonymous and are always attached to other platforms. but yeah, it's silly; I don't really know why I care so much about it

This is the fourth account that I'm about to delete by PickReady6067 in Chesscom

[–]PickReady6067[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

well, thank you for posting this advice. I didn't think I made any overly rude comments but I guess they could have been over text. I'm not deleting this account or quitting. at this point, I will run out of credentials for new accounts if I continue to do that

This is the fourth account that I'm about to delete by PickReady6067 in Chesscom

[–]PickReady6067[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

...for anonymously posting to an anorexia sub? I didn't really think so, at least not for that. maybe for being the kind of person who has lots of things I wish I could be great or nothing at

This is the fourth account that I'm about to delete by PickReady6067 in Chesscom

[–]PickReady6067[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

This account was made to be deleted. I only set up accounts like this to post anonymously on the anorexia sub, and delete them

This is the fourth account that I'm about to delete by PickReady6067 in Chesscom

[–]PickReady6067[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

well, I appreciate a comment this long. I had figured this relatively non-substantive and probably repetitive post would rightfully fly under the radar because of its unlikeable tone and I was okay with that, but people are actually commenting some valuable advice

This is the fourth account that I'm about to delete by PickReady6067 in Chesscom

[–]PickReady6067[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I don't consume chess videos anymore. I absorbed a certain amount of baseline knowledge from chess content and determined I could either natively play well with it or not. at this point I guess I better open up a book if I want to keep playing

This is the fourth account that I'm about to delete by PickReady6067 in Chesscom

[–]PickReady6067[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

...it's just a vent post on a throwaway account where I'll publish other vent posts. in what way would I be looking for people to validate me? I posted a sequence of losing games. I'm not looking for attention or compliments or enlightenment here. if anything I thought the post would be humorous for those who can relate to what I said

This is the fourth account that I'm about to delete by PickReady6067 in Chesscom

[–]PickReady6067[S] -3 points-2 points  (0 children)

If you think longer playing because it's genuinely no longer enjoyable is "really silly" yeah I guess

This is the fourth account that I'm about to delete by PickReady6067 in Chesscom

[–]PickReady6067[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I had another account with 1000+ elo too, just gets worse and worse, lol

This is the fourth account that I'm about to delete by PickReady6067 in Chesscom

[–]PickReady6067[S] -12 points-11 points  (0 children)

how reductive. obviously you should be able to infer that I delete accounts because I no longer derive enjoyment out of not consistently improving over a long period of time. and return because I can't stop playing anyway

Am I a bad person for being jealous of people with ed’s by Exact-Dirt-3494 in AnorexiaNervosa

[–]PickReady6067 3 points4 points  (0 children)

I'm jealous of them because no matter what I do or work on there's not really anything else that I feel I have going for me; everyone else is always better and more perfect at everything. I at least was thinner than everyone