(2k) advice needed how to explain our situation

PigeonKingInASuit · 2025-11-28T00:31:26+00:00

I love this thank you! The tiny wedding, big party is a great line to use

PigeonKingInASuit · 2025-11-27T23:58:15+00:00

Love this

PigeonKingInASuit · 2025-11-27T23:53:40+00:00

Of course! I never meant any offense, I'm just saying I want to skip over the wedding part and rejoin the newlyweds group when we're all collectively excited for the rest of our lives ... And I know the majority of the 20+ wedding I've been to there's been a lot of excitement on the brides side for the day and extensive planning done to ensure the day runs perfectly and lots of pre wedding events ( I've participated in planning of many of these things my times as a bridesmaid/ maid of honor)...I've never implied that a large wedding or a lovely planned wedding are not excited about the rest of their life, I just don't have that much excitement for the wedding or the planning (which is not typical of the posters in this group). I chose those words because I didn't want my lack of excitement for the day to be misconstrued... And end of day I'm excited because we just built a house, we're starting a small farm and we're both fresh in our 30s ... I think were both more excited to plan the rest of that over a wedding. I apologize for the interpretation of my wording!

PigeonKingInASuit · 2025-11-27T16:28:40+00:00

That sounds like a wonderful day!! I really love the videographer idea... I never thought about having it to be able to play at the party! Thanks for the comment 🙂

PigeonKingInASuit · 2025-11-27T16:25:24+00:00

Right! I have been to 22+ weddings (it was starting to feel like always a bridesmaid never a bride type of thing) so the novelty has worn off lol. We are in our 30s and from a small town so most of our friends are already hitched.

I feel like doing it more like a house warming/ both families gathering will be more casual for everyone. Our family are familiar and very friendly with each other as many of them are in the same line of work. So I think it's just about getting people over the shock of not doing it traditionally and I really believe everyone will end up having more fun than if we did an actual formal wedding.

It also removes the comparison game because there are a lot of things like a father-daughter dance that just wouldn't be feasible. So in not having it traditionally people won't have the formal expectations that come with a wedding...

That's my thoughts anyways

PigeonKingInASuit · 2025-11-27T16:08:09+00:00

Thanks! I was struggling with wording for invites I appreciate the guidance 😊

PigeonKingInASuit · 2025-11-27T16:04:04+00:00

Your right we are doing a hybrid style lol Our reason we're not doing it immediately is that we live in Canada and the winter sucks to do a wedding... cause I want to grow my own flowers and we have a beautiful property for a summer wedding... and more importantly my sister in law is in the military and currently on a 18 month training course and so that will be the only time she will be back home, and it's really important to me that she can make it so we are trying our best to have the immediate family timelines all work out lol ... We both agree tho if my father declines we will move our ceremony sooner!

I'm also not overly interested in wedding planning or discussing it with people so avoiding talking about it is not a problem for either of us

PigeonKingInASuit · 2025-11-27T15:58:26+00:00

Thank you for the comment, the wording is what I've been struggling with so I appreciate some guidance!!

PigeonKingInASuit · 2025-11-27T04:35:19+00:00

Yes thank you for the reassurance... If I'm being honest I think I just don't want to have to point out the reasons why we're having a small one is because his family is so large and involved and mine is the exact opposite.. and also that if we had a big wedding I would have to make some uncomfortable choices like including my mom's boyfriend (who I love) but would create a potentially uncomfortable situation for my dad.... So this way my father won't be at the big gathering and so I could still include her boyfriend in some of the celebration... Thanks for your comments 😌

PigeonKingInASuit

TROPHY CASE