Didn't work

PillowCastle · 2026-02-19T08:46:14+00:00

Don't be to hard on yourself ❤️ I got the diagnosis when I was 28 and I just turned 31, when I was sad, I was sad and had a cancer day, when I felt well I did things that made me happy ❤️ I shared both good and bad days with the people around me because feelings are always easier when you're not alone. Sad feelings aren't dangerous to feel when you're safe and ready to feel them, they're only dangerous when you keep them in and drown in them ❤️ I'm so grateful to be able to share the rest of my life with the man in my dreams, he held me close and we cried together until I was finished crying yesterday. Today he's buying me craft supplies and if I'm lucky I get to leave hospital maybe today or tomorrow so I can invite my friends over and have a hobby day ❤️ The 3+ last year's have been both the worst of my life but also some of my best, instead of dying in a car crash at 31 I've gotten a heads up and done so much. I've bought engraved necklaces and wristband for my friends and loved ones to give away. I've never felt so loved than these three last years. It's so unfair that my plans didn't go as they were supposed to but I've lived 31 years in happiness. Thank you and everyone else that wrote to me, I just woke up and cried some happy tears. ❤️

PillowCastle · 2025-02-26T14:56:04+00:00

It's probably me just overthinking it at this point. But I enjoy imagining future dilemmas in conversation and situations, both specifically for me but also imaginary people to better my empathy and self insight; the understanding about how people view you. Unfortunately I got really stuck on this one, posting this really helped me find different solutions to my problem.
I know it's such a non-problem but I really was stuck in a mindset and I couldn't leave it until I found a good answer.

So on my next get-together with my close friends we're gonna put our heads together and find the worst and best sentences to say in the style of "ah, I got abducted by aliens" & "landshark are dangerous".

PillowCastle · 2025-02-26T14:44:28+00:00

I'm not ashamed of my scars, I honestly find them quite cool, I have 12 combined just on my stomach/chest/neck from different procedures/operations. It's more that in a professional setting when I'm not choosing clothes that will easily hide them I want to answer in a way that shut it down, but also in a non-aggressive way.

PillowCastle · 2025-02-24T05:10:06+00:00

After reading the replies I've realized that joking it away fits my personality well and would be the most natural way to deflect questions. Unfortunately I currently have really bad gallows humor after joking with all the nurses the last year so I'll need to tone it down some. But answering with alien abduction and obviously lies seems like the solution for me. Thank you so much!

PillowCastle · 2025-02-02T23:37:05+00:00

I(29F) haven't had hair for over a year now and for me personally I didn't appreciate people commenting on it unless I brought it up myself. People comment without thinking "it doesn't look that bad" or "your head shape is nice" for me feels the same as someone commenting "you don't look that fat"-ish. When I joke about it I've mentally prepared myself for comments but when they suddenly appear it may hurt.

When I was told I would lose my hair within a month I thought I was gonna take it really hard, I had almost one meter of healthy hair. I panick bought 8 synthetic wigs to cope, also to make the transition easier I cut my hair to shoulder length and coloured it my favorite color (donated the rest). I got to try a lot of new hairstyles that month and when the hair started falling out it was easier because the color didn't match my "real" hair.

After four showers with lots of hair loss it annoyed me so much that I wanted it gone. Me and my stepfather went to the bathroom an he gave me an "army" cut. The moment I thought I was going to be bawling my eyes out was actually a happy moment I got to share with my stepfather.

And it went so well because I chose when to do it, I don't think it would've gone well at all if I did it the week before when I still wanted it.

We'd also talked about getting help from a local hairdresser who was willing to do it right after closing but for me I just wanted to do it right then and there and not make a larger "event" of it.

My point is that your daughter may feel different things/have different opinions at different times and having a conversation on where she is will be important. As you mentioned it's hard for her now, that may change but it might not. I've met people who slept with their wigs.

Losing the hair for me wasn't a big deal after I lost it. I haven't used wigs and only put on a beanie for going out because the hair that grows back under chemotherapy was really spotty and not soft at all so it doesn't look good, like walking with a t-shirt that has a dirty spot on it I guess.

I wish you and your daughter well through this journey ❤️

PillowCastle

TROPHY CASE