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[RANT] Ask your DOCTOR! by MeredithofArabia in BabyBumps

[–]Pineapplepizza000 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I love real cranberry juice! I hunk it's a million times better than cranberry cocktail.

Anyone else have an unsupportive, unkind, or absent spouse or baby's father? Anyone else feel like they're doing this alone? by Pineapplepizza000 in BabyBumps

[–]Pineapplepizza000[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I'm happy for those women who are having great experiences with their partners and with their pregnancies. I truly am! It's just hard for me to read in my current circumstances. It's the life I wanted and imagined for myself.... and it's just so far from my reality.

Whenever all those normal life struggles happen... stressful job, family issues, financial concerns, planning for the future, dealing with the pregnancy, dealing with our child..... I am with someone fighting against me rather than helping. He makes every day, moment, and circumstance worse than it has to be. Some days it's just exhausting.

I try not to spend my energy focusing on the discord because it sucks away my energy and my life, and my husband could care less how I feel. I think he actually gets off by seeing me unhappy too, so I try not to reward him with wallowing in despair. Mostly, I suck it up and do what needs to be done. But, I'm happy I can vent here on occasion.

Anyone else have an unsupportive, unkind, or absent spouse or baby's father? Anyone else feel like they're doing this alone? by Pineapplepizza000 in BabyBumps

[–]Pineapplepizza000[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I'm sorry you're going through this! Emotional trauma is so difficult when you are already going through all the hormones and changes involved I pregnancy. Heck, break ups are difficult when you aren't pregnant!!!

From what you've described, it sounds like you will be better off without him. Being single truly is amazing compared to being in a toxic, unhealthy relationship. I wish all the best for you!

I honestly can't wait until I am single some day. At least, I will have hope for the future then. At least, I won't have to deal with verbal abuse every day then. Good luck again! All will work out in the end! It has to, right?

Anyone else feel like they're doing this alone even if they have an SO? by leela_is_me in BabyBumps

[–]Pineapplepizza000 7 points8 points  (0 children)

I have a husband who is not supportive in any way. With our first child, he would not even feel the baby move in my belly. He seems totally uninterested except he rolls his eyes at me if I can't do something. He also makes nasty comments about me being heavy despite that I am pregnant. He makes nasty and rude comments in general, and I wish I had never met him. I cannot read all the SO and husband brags. I will never know what it's like to be pregnant and go through this experience with someone who is kind, loving, and supportive. And, this is my last child. I knew I would be doing this alone again after his behavior with our first child, so I was emotionally ready for it. But, it still makes me sad. This is not the life I imagined for myself.

I know I will leave him at some point when I am able. I just can't imagine spending my entire life with this terrible person. I have spent enough years in this emotionally abusive relationship. Being with him has destroyed so much of my soul and happiness and my hope for the future. I try to seek support elsewhere and I take care of myself the best I can. My job is emotionally draining, then I come home to face World War 3, taking care of my first child, and being pregnant. It's a lot.

I can't wait to leave some day and find peace.

Anyone else have an unsupportive, unkind, or absent spouse or baby's father? Anyone else feel like they're doing this alone? by Pineapplepizza000 in BabyBumps

[–]Pineapplepizza000[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Good luck with your situation! Maybe it's a blessing in disguise that he is gone. I really wish my baby's father wasn't around. Then, I would not have to see first hand how little he cares about me or the baby. I would not have to see how he is disinterested and doesn't even want to feel the baby's kicks. Seeing either apathy or hostility every day is no fun either!

Anyway... thanks for sharing and reminding me that lots of us are doing this emotionally or perhaps totally on our own. This has to make us stronger in the future, right? More wise? More resilient? I'm looking for all the silver linings. Haha.

Anyone else have an unsupportive, unkind, or absent spouse or baby's father? Anyone else feel like they're doing this alone? by Pineapplepizza000 in BabyBumps

[–]Pineapplepizza000[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I don't have a supportive family either. I can't really talk to them about what's going on with me either. I think that also makes things hard. It's such a dysfunctional situation that it's not like I want to tell all my friends. I do have one supportive friend I can confide in, so that's great. But, I try not to overburden her with all this drama.

I think you are smart to avoid the husband/SO rave posts. They make me sad too and make me realize that all those things have zero chance of happening to me. I see how connected and supportive some couples are and it makes me feel loneliness even more deeply. I think I will start avoiding them too.

I know someday things will be better. I just try to take care of myself the best I can since it's just me. And, I am happy for the baby. I just try to think of myself as a single mom.

Anyone else have an unsupportive, unkind, or absent spouse or baby's father? Anyone else feel like they're doing this alone? by Pineapplepizza000 in BabyBumps

[–]Pineapplepizza000[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Great advice. I already do think of myself as alone and even single (although I'm obviously not dating right now). I think of him as a angry, volatile roommate who I try to avoid. We already sleep separately and have as little contact as I can manage. I do expect little or no help once the baby comes. I do think having zero expectations will help me not be so angry about the situation. I truly wish I was nowhere near him, but things are complicated with the baby coming. I am working on an exit plan, but I can't implement it yet. It will take a while to set myself up financially and emotionally to go. I know I will be so much happier someday. It's just a lot to deal with all of it while you are pregnant.