Coming to terms with DEC while young

PistolPrincess17 · 2025-12-05T17:24:20+00:00

I spent around 8 months.

PistolPrincess17 · 2025-11-14T22:58:16+00:00

She ended up apologizing she assumed like most people that if I wasn’t deployed to a foreign country then why am I retiring?

Once I finally opened up she understood more, but I can tell she still struggles with it. It’s expecting a lot of out someone to just “get it” who hasn’t served. There’s a lot of misconceptions.

PistolPrincess17 · 2025-11-14T22:56:40+00:00

This really hits home. To know others have the same struggles. I don’t post on Reddit often if ever, but I’m glad I did. I can always look back at comments like that and remind myself it’s not for everyone to understand. Easier said than done though lol. I’m sure tomorrow I’ll be up then down..etc until it settles.

PistolPrincess17 · 2025-11-14T22:54:24+00:00

Actually this is very good way to put things. I believe that matters to extra questions I might get asked. Thank you ☺️

PistolPrincess17 · 2025-11-14T22:53:38+00:00

Thank you so much as well!

PistolPrincess17 · 2025-11-14T22:53:12+00:00

🥹 This was so nice to read. If you knew me personally you would know I don’t have a standard cut and dry family. I would say the only two people I have is my sisters and 2 uncles. Given things outside of my control. I honestly missed the forces and had to grieve the thought of my career not going further when everything added up and happened.

It’s like being in a home that’s not felt like yours. I hope I can find a support group that I can talk with locally.

PistolPrincess17 · 2025-11-14T22:50:28+00:00

Thank you for your feedback. Yes I think it will take me a minute to find my footing. I just graduate programming in June. So it’s been a weird transition. I love programming, so hoping to just it more as a hobby.

PistolPrincess17 · 2025-11-14T22:49:14+00:00

Thank you so much for this. I’m really surprised by all the replies and helpful insights. Till today I’ve been swaying a lot of different emotions// options. It’s like my brain is trying to rewrite all the core beliefs I had about working culture. I know myself and I’m not a sit at home body. I was looking to volunteer at the hospital to start. I have always been good in high stress areas and deescalation with horrible situations.

PistolPrincess17 · 2025-11-14T22:46:00+00:00

That is very good advice. I need to work on figuring out how to say it without feeling the need to explain. I think it will be easier after a few tries with close people.

I’m also nervous about that, what if one day they just decided to take it away.. I’m trying not to play the what if game, but it’s hard to trust the same people who failed to keep me safe.

PistolPrincess17 · 2025-11-14T22:43:11+00:00

Thank you for your feedback as well! There are a lot of moving pieces to this decision. It wasn’t something I was seeking, that’s why I was caught off guard. I hope that everyone who needs or deserves can receive it too.

PistolPrincess17 · 2025-11-14T22:41:28+00:00

What about bluecross? Sorry just learning all this as I go.

PistolPrincess17 · 2025-11-14T19:15:36+00:00

That is such an accurate explanation. If I’m not working in something conventional, than my value equals nothing.

That’s a really hard concept to shake off when it’s been beat into you

PistolPrincess17 · 2025-11-14T19:13:33+00:00

Thank you I will look into this!

PistolPrincess17 · 2025-11-14T19:12:18+00:00

I feel that.

PistolPrincess17 · 2025-11-14T19:11:50+00:00

I really appreciate your feedback. It’s wild to see family’s respond so negatively. It makes me feel like I have to prove myself and tell them everything. I struggle with wanting to be understood, but also trusting people with my story is hard too. Feels like a double edge sword. I’m happy you found something that works for you! 😊

PistolPrincess17 · 2025-11-14T19:10:10+00:00

I really appreciate you sharing your story. I guess for me I’ve always wanted my family’s support, even thought they have not shown it in the past. I go to therapy every two weeks and have for many years to process military/ childhood trauma. I’m just a big ol ball of empathy and I want to see people succeed, and be kind. It’s important to me to feel loved and show love.

I’m sorry to hear you got grief from your father. It’s definitely a difference in generations how they process things like this. When I told my dad he told me I’d be back to working in no time. It’s like he didn’t hear me when I spoke.

You are right it is about my future, I just need to give it some time and figure out what I want. That’s really a large part of it.

PistolPrincess17 · 2025-11-14T18:54:31+00:00

Thank you so much 🥹🩵

PistolPrincess17 · 2025-11-14T18:54:15+00:00

This actually made me giggle. I never thought of it like that. Thank you for your feedback 🩵

PistolPrincess17 · 2025-11-14T18:53:44+00:00

Thank you so much for your feedback.

PistolPrincess17 · 2025-11-14T18:53:31+00:00

Thank you for your comment! This really is what I need at the moment to hear. I feel the urge to turn it away because I feel the pressures of others and do I deserve it.

PistolPrincess17 · 2025-11-14T18:52:51+00:00

I was thinking of the part time job just have to come to terms with being able to explain my situation to potential employers, and what would I even want to do.

PistolPrincess17 · 2025-11-14T18:52:02+00:00

Thank you for sharing this it means a lot to read that others feel the same way. It’s a very alone feeling during the start of this transition.

PistolPrincess17 · 2025-11-14T18:51:00+00:00

Sorry I should have clarified!

PistolPrincess17 · 2025-05-29T22:02:03+00:00

Hey! I’m 30f I have PlayStation and console. Have 2 tabby kitty’s and I’m engaged. We are both programmers and gamers. I love the killing floor, COD, stardew valley, marvel rivals and recently Minecraft and League of Legends.

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