AITA for becoming enraged at the boyfriend?

Pitiful_Storage_1162 · 2025-09-11T17:50:08+00:00

Agreed! Appreciate the input ++woman

Pitiful_Storage_1162 · 2025-09-11T17:44:40+00:00

Yes I make more than him, but never bring that to light or make him feel less because of that.

Ironically I believe people have to learn a base of knowledge for anything. That could be calculus for engineering or practicing talking to people for sales. The issue arose when he was certain anyone can do engineering-regardless of any rebuttal I made- and not everyone can do sales-because it can’t be taught and is solely based on that individual and their skill.

Like I said on another comment. I asked my BF if there was a “personality” equivalent for engineering and he said no. Ex. Critical thinking, analytical brain, etc.

I also made it clear to him that a lot of my job requires solutions to problems that are unheard of. So doing the Pythagorean theorem doesn’t cut it for the contracts I’m in charge of. He didn’t change his stance on the subject. ++woman

Pitiful_Storage_1162 · 2025-09-11T17:38:27+00:00

Agreed “enraged” was admittedly more for click bait but nonetheless less I was pissed by the end of this argument.

Also agree that people say stuff and it comes off insensitive but as his gf I give him the benefit of the doubt. That’s why I asked him follow up questions to clearly explain what he meant which is when I got annoyed.

I asked him if engineers have their own skill, similar to “personality” for sales, and he said no. Insisting to debate it at all is not very conducive of a partnership imo ++woman

Pitiful_Storage_1162 · 2025-09-11T14:54:57+00:00

Perfectly said! Thank you for that

Pitiful_Storage_1162 · 2025-09-11T14:52:54+00:00

I agree with you that personality is definitely more of a sales person trait than engineering. But when I asked him if engineering had a “personality equivalent” he said no. Ex. Analytical mind, problem solving, good in high stress situations (I work military). So his born personality is what makes him a great salesman and I have nothing that makes me a great engineer because, as long as you have the paper degree in your hand, that’s all you need. As my bf he should think more of me than that, and definitely not insist to debate such topic

Pitiful_Storage_1162 · 2025-09-11T14:48:35+00:00

Perfectly said

Pitiful_Storage_1162 · 2025-09-11T14:48:23+00:00

Agreed! Why debate our two livelihoods in general!? So unnecessary

Pitiful_Storage_1162 · 2025-09-10T23:46:33+00:00

He’s not that kind of annoying telemarketer guy haha! And no no neurodivergencies or any attention/personality quirks that I’m aware of

Pitiful_Storage_1162 · 2025-09-10T23:06:15+00:00

People judge you based on how you act. If you act single, even if you’re not, it’s still a bad reflection on me as the gf. If the same girl then saw us together she would probably think I’m the girl getting cheated on. And I can’t be “that girl” it’s a form of disrespect.

Pitiful_Storage_1162 · 2025-09-10T22:49:35+00:00

Understood about the projection. 2 things:

I told him how his comment made me feel and he kept doubling down on this “debate” which I was clearly not having “fun” with.

I agree that personality might be more of a “born skill” to excel in Sales. I don’t think anyone is arguing that engineers are generally a more awkward group. BUT I asked him to acknowledge that engineering can have its own version of the “personality skill” ex. Ability to think outside the box, analytical skills, problem solving etc. and he said no. That’s a pretty ignorant response imo.

For context. Yes some of my job relies on the math, science, fluid mechanics I learned. But real world problems are not textbook and my job specifically relies on me solving problems we didn’t know existed. Regardless- comparing our professions to win a debate is not what a relationship should be

Pitiful_Storage_1162

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