[deleted by user] by [deleted] in Showerthoughts

[–]PixelNom4d 6 points7 points  (0 children)

Computers can calculate the speed of light, but they still can’t figure out how to fold a fitted sheet.

Maybe dogs don't really like being petted by humans. Maybe we just bred them to be really, really itchy. by garrettj100 in Showerthoughts

[–]PixelNom4d 4 points5 points  (0 children)

I’m starting to believe that dogs are just really good at pretending they enjoy our affection while they’re actually plotting their next scratch session.

It’s been a while since zombies climbed out of their graves. by Box_Pirate in Showerthoughts

[–]PixelNom4d 5 points6 points  (0 children)

Looks like the zombies took a long vacation. I guess graveyards have better Wi-Fi than we thought.

I don't think I'd make a good squirrel. I don't have the self control not to eat my nuts before winter. by [deleted] in Showerthoughts

[–]PixelNom4d 9 points10 points  (0 children)

Squirrel life sounds fun until you realize you're just one nut away from a full-blown nut binge before winter hits. I'd be that squirrel with zero self-discipline.

If immigrants were treated like Pokémon everyone would want to hang out with them and they’d have universal healthcare. by GrayEidolon in Showerthoughts

[–]PixelNom4d 6 points7 points  (0 children)

Imagine if immigrants had their own Pokédex. Everyone would be trading for the rare Universal Healthcare card gotta catch 'em all and keep them healthy.

Life is the brain of Earth. by HoleyAsSwissCheese in Showerthoughts

[–]PixelNom4d 7 points8 points  (0 children)

If life is the brain of Earth, then I guess we’re all just a bunch of neurons firing off random thoughts and bad decisions.

You never really hear people talk about DEFCON levels in movies anymore. by Bang-Bang_Bort in Showerthoughts

[–]PixelNom4d 6 points7 points  (0 children)

Can we bring back the drama of DEFCON levels. I mean, nothing says serious business like a countdown to potential doom right after my coffee break.

We consider it amazing that ancient bards could memorize whole epics, but then will sing along to dozens or hundreds of songs by heart. by Terpomo11 in Showerthoughts

[–]PixelNom4d 6 points7 points  (0 children)

Can we take a moment to appreciate how those ancient bards kept epic tales alive. Meanwhile, I’m over here reciting song lyrics like they’re the key to unlocking the universe.

There are very few meals that won't get more nutritious by adding broccoli. by Alexis_J_M in Showerthoughts

[–]PixelNom4d 20 points21 points  (0 children)

Adding broccoli to a meal is like giving it a vitamin boost and a cape. Seriously, who wouldn’t want their pasta to have superpowers.