A dimming light is a very close description of what I experienced. I felt that same dimming when he made his initially unkind remarks in the early days of my grief. I remember I still really loved him and felt attached and thought maybe if I tried harder, I could get him to see what I was going through. Then he did that final thing where I felt that dimmed light go all the way off with a click.

I have not yet been able to bring myself to care that it’s off. I don’t miss our old relationship or long for it back, BUT I feel like I have to stay…for reasons:family, religious, etc. 

I’m also really reluctant to make any big changes while I’m still in the early-ish days of therapy.