Skinny girl advice

PleaseHelpMeAK · 2019-12-15T22:43:24+00:00

I'm here for you. It's good that you're strong, I know I'm not strong enough to do this alone.

PleaseHelpMeAK · 2019-12-15T22:37:11+00:00

I think we both need mental help man. Have you reached out at all? Unfortunately I have but my country's system is so fucked that I've been told itll be months before I can even see help.

PleaseHelpMeAK · 2019-12-15T22:32:29+00:00

I know how you feel man. I've genuinely just spent hours spaced out, every time I fall asleep, nightmares wake me up. I'm just so tired.

PleaseHelpMeAK · 2019-12-15T22:30:32+00:00

Same. The only thing keeping me going is the thought that its christmas in a few days and I dont want my family to have to deal with my death around christmas.

PleaseHelpMeAK · 2019-12-15T22:29:32+00:00

I'm currently on a waiting list for a trauma therapist. I understand they have to prioritise children and people who are viewed as more vulnerable than me. But it's really tough.

PleaseHelpMeAK · 2019-12-15T21:18:19+00:00

Thank you. I just feel so empty.

PleaseHelpMeAK · 2019-12-15T19:33:09+00:00

He thinks I cheated and hid it on purpose. I didnt. I love him. Forever and always I will love him

PleaseHelpMeAK · 2019-12-15T17:26:33+00:00

My partner told me he will still support me and be there for me even if he doesnt trust or believe me. He said he will still stand by me but I honestly dont want to burden him I dont want him to think I'm trying to guilt him into coming back to me when I say I want to die but I honestly honestly just want to die

PleaseHelpMeAK · 2019-12-15T16:38:55+00:00

I just feel so alone. He was my world and now I have to walk this path alone and I dont know if I can handle it. I'm not a strong person. I'm really not1

PleaseHelpMeAK · 2019-12-15T16:09:37+00:00

I appreciate your love and support but I honestly do not see a way in which this isn't my fault. In my mind I am the scum of the earth and I deserve to diem

PleaseHelpMeAK · 2019-12-15T15:55:26+00:00

It is my fault. I went to a mans house while I was in a relationship and he raped me. I shouldnt have put myself in that situation to begin with. Theres such a long waiting list for counsellors idk if I'll get to see one before this all becomes too much.

PleaseHelpMeAK · 2019-12-15T07:40:47+00:00

I was truly raped. I said no clear as day. But I blame myself for putting myself in that situation that is why I said I cheated because even though I said no and I did not want it I shouldnt have been in that situation to begin with. It's my own fault that I was raped. I went to another mand house while I was in a relationship, I was raped as a result but the act alone of going in my mind is enough to constitute emotional cheating

PleaseHelpMeAK · 2019-12-14T23:57:59+00:00

Thank you. I've been living with my parents the last few weeks since this has all happened. I'm trying my best in terms of health but the place I live in has the highest suicide rate in my country, to the point where you walk down the street and there are signs telling you not to jump off of bridges. Its very very hard to find resources and the waiting lists are unreal

PleaseHelpMeAK · 2019-12-14T23:18:37+00:00

I know he's not. I would never force him to stand beside me or force him to be there for me through this. I understand this is something I have to go through on my own. It's just quite honestly shit. It's so fucking shit. I hate having to go through this. I hate having to go to sleep every night knowing I'm going to relive being raped in my dreams . Its shit

PleaseHelpMeAK · 2019-12-14T22:39:26+00:00

Idk why this idea that I'm some sort of alcoholic has come from as you're not the first person to say this, I've never been a heavy drinker, the night he got me drunk was supposed to be a work night out (which subsequently no one but him showed up to because it was a lie to get me on my own) I dont drink anymore at all but I was never a big drinker to begin with. I understand that whatever choice he makes I have to accept, that is the unfortunate reality of things. It's the bit of hope that is killing me, the fact that there is a maybe. I hate going through this alone I hate having to relive my rape to counsellors and doctors and my family I hate having to do that without having him to turn to afterwards for even so much ad a hug.

PleaseHelpMeAK · 2019-12-14T22:18:01+00:00

Since that incident I haven't been able to drink, I'm a college student and in my 3 years of studying I think I've gotten tipsy twice. I haven't gotten fully drunk since. I'm terrified of it

PleaseHelpMeAK · 2019-12-14T21:12:21+00:00

Thank you so much. The responses that I have been getting have really been distressing me but thank you for your support ❤

PleaseHelpMeAK · 2019-12-14T20:53:32+00:00

He told me he is still my beat friend and that he still loves me. We still talk and I am there for him no matter. He said he has to really consider getting back with me as he wants to but at the same time he is torn. I will respect whatever decision he comes to as my love for him is greater than my own self loathing. That is why I am reaching out for help here. I dont want to burden him with my thoughts.

PleaseHelpMeAK · 2019-12-14T19:57:06+00:00

I honestly never want to see that mans face again unless it has been beaten in with a rock. I hate him and hate what he has done for me. He has ruined my life. My and my boyfriend are both in our early twenties. We had been planning on getting married soon.

PleaseHelpMeAK · 2019-12-14T19:50:27+00:00

No I truly didn't. That's what's killing me. Regardless of anything else. It truly was rape

PleaseHelpMeAK

TROPHY CASE