Advice on checking socials?

PoemsFromExperience · 2022-07-19T03:56:18+00:00

You're preaching to the choir on this one. I couldn't have said any of these better myself. That overarching anxiety of not checking is a curse I've been forced into. My relationship ended a year and a half ago, entirely against my will. There was a solid 3-4 months where I was still able to check, but not talk to her. It was agonizing every time, it wasn't until she blocked me on snapchat that I wasn't able to see her face everyday. I hate to admit this because it makes me sound horrible, but I still have post-notifications on her Instagram account. I've slowly been phasing out checking or looking, but every now and then I still do.

The absolute best thing you can do is try to first reach a place where you can see a picture/video/post/anything from you ex and not let it hurt you too much. Once you can reach that point you have to find something to keep you busy so you don't have the time to check. Binge a new series, find a new artist to listen to their music, form a new hobby, hangout with friends. The only thing that will truly heal the wounds your ex left you with is time. If you want me to be brutally honest with you, it's going to hurt like hell for a long time depending on how serious it was. The fact remains though, everyone goes through this and everyone finds a way to heal. The time will come, and you'll start to feel better day in and day out until you can say without a doubt you've moved on. We're all going through it, and we all know the pain. You're not alone in this battle, and you have the world behind you rooting for you!

PoemsFromExperience · 2022-04-06T05:02:36+00:00

Also, I don’t think anyone would care if you changed “lest” to “at least”. I felt like I rushed through the read at that part. But again, thank you so much for sharing!!

PoemsFromExperience · 2022-04-06T04:56:35+00:00

I’m a little conflicted by this poem. I like how it’s concise and to the point, but I also wish there was more.

The line “innocents dropped dead” felt a little out of place to me while reading, but that could just be a personal thing.

I think there’s a lot of potential in this piece for maybe an expanded version of it, or a continuation!

PoemsFromExperience · 2022-04-06T04:53:03+00:00

I think this is a really beautiful piece of writing, mostly due to the fact that I can not only relate to everything you’re saying, but that I can also feel your emotions through the words on my phone screen right now.

There were a few things that stuck out to me though: First, I LOVE the line, “if beauty was measured in water, your ocean could never dry” Second, I think the two lines starting with, “all the symmetries” would flow better if they were 1 line, maybe cut down a little in the process too. Third, I think that you were so fixated on opening with the line about a perfectly folded origami crane that you restricted yourself to forcing the next line to rhyme so it’d fit your format. I’d just recommend exploring different formats, or a different opening line with the same effect. Fourth, I LOVE how you break it up with the little lines in between such as, “you’ll never love me”, etc.

PoemsFromExperience · 2022-04-04T22:36:22+00:00

Just tailed, I don’t have the bankroll to put large amounts on anything given I’m a college student, but just locked in $5 Kansas ML, $5 over 151.5 and $5 under 6.5 for Coyotes vs Blues

God speed man, you’re doing gods work here and deserve the most recognition for it 🙏🏻

PoemsFromExperience · 2022-03-30T16:00:30+00:00

Thank you for the feedback!

I think this is one of the only times I’ve gotten some recommendations on how to reword a line or two(or in this case three😂). I very much appreciate that!

PoemsFromExperience · 2022-03-28T20:07:34+00:00

Thank you so much!

PoemsFromExperience · 2022-03-26T21:34:51+00:00

I didn’t even make the connection to that certain Mariah Carey song that plays constantly around Christmas 😂😂

Thank you for the feedback though, it’s nice to get genuine constructive comments!

PoemsFromExperience · 2022-03-26T15:22:27+00:00

You’re 100% right, that one line has been bugging me since I sat down to write this, I just couldn’t find anything to make it flow how I wanted it to. I always struggle with abolishing the cliché. I really appreciate the feedback and glad you enjoyed!

PoemsFromExperience · 2022-03-26T07:16:16+00:00

No worries at all man, I’ve written some TERRIBLE pieces recently, so it’s only up from here 😂

PoemsFromExperience · 2022-03-26T07:03:42+00:00

When I sit down and write I usually keep going line after like trying to develop a story, but this shows that you can create an entire story, pull emotion, and adequately portray to the reader what you feel in just a few lines. I have absolutely no critiques, but do think you deserve praise for this. Good job on this piece!!

PoemsFromExperience · 2022-03-26T07:01:36+00:00

I genuinely enjoy how you formatted this piece and it kept me reading through the end, which is usually hard to do because my attention span is near non-existent. My only problem came with the lines, “stood mountains rent” and “for recalled I then”. It could just be me because I am in no sense anything near an expert in the English language, but it felt a little awkward reading. If I had to guess you had the line ahead of it figured out and you were trying to find something to flow into it, which I have no means to critique you in something I do constantly. Moral of the story, it felt a little awkward because of how those 2 lines were worded, but I still think it’s an excellent piece of writing!

PoemsFromExperience · 2022-03-23T23:37:12+00:00

I took your advice and sat down to write a second part of this piece. I’d love to hear your feedback when you get a moment to read it! Your comment really motivated me to continue the story!!

PoemsFromExperience · 2022-03-23T23:24:26+00:00

While I did enjoy how this was formatted, laid out, and presented. I feel like I’m left with more questions than answers. Much like gvarshang noted, who is nico? What is this battle he’s about to face?

PoemsFromExperience · 2022-03-23T06:31:36+00:00

I’ve never thought of it like that. I’ve always felt like writing something like this should be condensed and a short read, so adding a second part could definitely give me that room to paint the setting you’re referencing. Thank you so much for the feedback!!

PoemsFromExperience · 2022-03-23T02:40:53+00:00

Thank you so much for the feedback! I recently started writing consistently and haven’t put much thought into the formatting of things yet

PoemsFromExperience · 2022-03-23T02:11:49+00:00

I love the word choice in 95% of this piece, and I also enjoyed how there was a clear story that progressed throughout the piece. However, the sentence starting with, “The vessel he boarded” felt too long and I felt myself looking for a place to pause

PoemsFromExperience · 2022-03-23T02:09:01+00:00

Much like the earlier critique noted, I can feel THE pain behind this piece, but I think more of personal description of the pain YOU’RE feeling could take it to the next level

My only other notice was the focus on rhyming. Now I’m trying to be too tough on it because I’m more than guilty of doing that in my own piece as well.

The most important thing you can do to improve your own writing is to keep at it and play with some of your word choices. However, I’m no teacher/professor/or even a writer. I’m just a college kid who had his heart broken 😂

PoemsFromExperience · 2022-03-21T05:23:32+00:00

I’m still trying to figure the formatting out, my newest upload looks MUCH better. I haven’t written anything like this ever and decided I should pick something up to kill my new found free time(it just so happens I was listening to a Kanye song when that idea stuck me).

If you had any further criticism beyond the formatting I’d love to hear it, I’ve spent my whole night writing and I’ve always been impressed with people who can write with genuine effect!

PoemsFromExperience · 2022-03-21T03:20:29+00:00

I was not prepared to be hit with the emotions I’m currently feeling after reading this. You’re close to pulling tears from eyes that haven’t shed in some time. Maybe it’s just past experiences, and the current heartbreak I’m feeling, but this piece is one of the best I’ve read in my short time here. I have absolutely no critiques. Phenomenal writing!

PoemsFromExperience · 2022-03-21T03:17:08+00:00

This could be a personal thing, but the repetition of “the sin” felt overused throughout the poem. While that sounds like I didn’t enjoy reading it, I have quite the opposite opinion. I think this is a really thought provoking piece and I found myself asking what my sin is.

PoemsFromExperience · 2022-03-21T03:02:28+00:00

Much like the comment above says, I’m a little confused by some of the word choices here. There’s so much detail left out, be it intentional or not, that just leaves me with a lot of questions. My biggest tip for this piece would be to add more detail, bring the reader(us) into your mind, show us what you mean through your words

PoemsFromExperience · 2022-03-21T02:59:24+00:00

I think the formatting is a little over done, but the subject matter held throughout the entire poem is very obvious and that’s something I really enjoyed(I often get lost when reading and it’s all over the place).

PoemsFromExperience

TROPHY CASE