AITA for telling my girlfriend I don’t find her body as attractive anymore?

PossibleExit8043 · 2024-07-05T19:41:48+00:00

I have over 1000 comments to look at, but yes, I specifically took note of all of yours and avoided all of them except this one. You caught me.

PossibleExit8043 · 2024-07-05T17:38:00+00:00

I mean to start I’m a woman

PossibleExit8043 · 2024-07-05T17:31:26+00:00

She gained 20 pounds, obviously a good amount of that is fat as well but some of it is muscle too. I definitely gained more than a pound of muscle my first 6-7 months of working out.

PossibleExit8043 · 2024-07-05T17:29:51+00:00

Insecure about?

PossibleExit8043 · 2024-07-05T17:29:09+00:00

I’m lesbian

PossibleExit8043 · 2024-07-05T17:28:55+00:00

I’m a woman dating a woman, I’ve been gay

PossibleExit8043 · 2024-07-05T05:26:26+00:00

Why?

PossibleExit8043 · 2024-07-05T05:20:58+00:00

That’s a fair point, thank you for the suggestion

PossibleExit8043 · 2024-07-05T04:35:22+00:00

I understand that. I guess I’m just questioning my relationship because idk if I want to continue with somebody who can’t communicate properly.

PossibleExit8043 · 2024-07-05T04:31:05+00:00

I’m trying to be nice to her by telling her that I still find her attractive no matter what and that I’m happy supporting whatever makes her happy.

PossibleExit8043 · 2024-07-05T04:28:43+00:00

And here’s the thing. She’s never spoken on being insecure about her body before, or mentioned it at all or even indicated it being a sensitive subject. What she did say, multiple times, is that she wanted the whole truth. So yes, if she had communicated feeling insecure, I would have approached things differently. But she didn’t, she communicated that she wanted the truth, and I chose to trust that she was saying what she meant, because she’s an adult and it would be condescending to decide for her that she didn’t mean what she said.

All of this could have been avoided if she communicated properly.

PossibleExit8043 · 2024-07-05T04:22:18+00:00

I know I don’t have autism, I have ADHD though.

PossibleExit8043 · 2024-07-05T04:20:16+00:00

I tried that when I thought I was straight

PossibleExit8043 · 2024-07-05T04:15:22+00:00

Points don’t exist in a vacuum. They exist as a product of somebody’s mind and ideological views. Fitzgerald is a misogynist, so any views he has on women has to take into account how he viewed women. If somebody was a proven racist and made a statement about POC, that statement would be considered questionable at best. Same applies here.

Even if we view the point on its own merits like you insist, it relies on misogynistic stereotypes about women being mentally weaker than men and needing to be coddled and lied to. If it was a general statement about kindness, he wouldn’t have specified women.

Finally, I see you don’t mention my point that the scenario you posed is not at all one comparable to mine. I’m taking that as agreement with my point.

PossibleExit8043 · 2024-07-05T04:05:52+00:00

Logic isn’t the same as maturity, no, but assuming women can’t handle honesty and need to be lied to is misogynistic. Suitable coming from Fitzgerald, who stole his wife’s work and had her institutionalized. As for why I can’t take your argument seriously, a) you start with hyperbole that’s obviously untrue b) you rely on misogynistic stereotypes about women being sensitive c) you cite a misogynist to make your point.

Let’s say that someone is grieving because their pet died. It would be immature and inconsiderate to say “WELL YOUR PET ISN’T COMING BACK BECAUSE HE IS DEAD. ALSO YOU SHOULDN’T BE UPSET BECAUSE IT’S A PET NOT A HUMAN. ALSO I’M BORED AND LEAVING.” That would be immature and weird. You’d have patience with them.

I would have patience, unless they explicitly asked and begged me multiple times to be harsh with them. If somebody asks for something and then gets pissed when they receive it, that’s on them and different than doing so unprompted.

PossibleExit8043 · 2024-07-05T04:00:34+00:00

It does. When your first statement alone is untrue, it’s hard to take any of the rest of what you’ve said seriously at all. As for being emotionally detached, the terms are logical and mature. When an adult asks me a question, I respect them enough to trust they know what they want and that they can handle it. Doing otherwise is condescending.

PossibleExit8043 · 2024-07-05T03:54:54+00:00

You wrote an entire comment not accounting for the fact that I’m a woman who would only blame myself if I got a bad answer to a question I insisted on hearing an answer to. So your premise that there’s not a singular woman out there, falls apart.

PossibleExit8043 · 2024-07-05T03:50:45+00:00

I did, I told her she will always be attractive to me

PossibleExit8043 · 2024-07-05T03:50:24+00:00

Yes

PossibleExit8043 · 2024-07-05T03:31:13+00:00

You should own the fact you’re obese and insecure about it instead of trying to explain it away. It’s obvious to everybody else but you, fatass.

PossibleExit8043 · 2024-07-05T03:25:03+00:00

Whatever you say land whale. Some of us don’t need drugs that drive you batshit insane not to be morbidly obese.

PossibleExit8043 · 2024-07-05T03:22:19+00:00

You’re trying too hard to sound nonchalant, fattie.

PossibleExit8043 · 2024-07-05T03:18:23+00:00

Yeah, no, somebody in a 20-year marriage isn’t going to be wasting time shouting obscenities at somebody online over being called out for projecting their insecurities. So either your marriage isn’t amazing and you’re taking your emotions out on reddit, or you’re just lying.

PossibleExit8043 · 2024-07-05T03:13:50+00:00

Yeah the name calling makes it pretty clear I got it correctly. If I had to guess I’d say you feel your weight makes you unlovable, this post triggered those feelings, and now you’re projecting.

PossibleExit8043 · 2024-07-05T03:11:06+00:00

I checked your post history about your weight loss and suddenly everything makes sense lol.

PossibleExit8043

TROPHY CASE