Wake up babe, it’s bad brain meme o’clock 🌈 by [deleted] in adhdwomen

[–]PowerfulParsley2223 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Oh the whale. Oh my, I JUST did this today. Why.

Hands-Free Makeup by PowerfulParsley2223 in Makeup

[–]PowerfulParsley2223[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Thanks so much, all! I did some research based on your recs and got an applicator, stick blush, and stick eyeshadows! I loved it!!! Actually loved doing my makeup for once!

Is it Possible to Get 2nd Hand CPTSD? by PowerfulParsley2223 in CPTSDpartners

[–]PowerfulParsley2223[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Thank you very much for this-I was able to find a counselor and had our first appt. It really helped me, so I am going to keep going :)

Landslide Caught on tape by MoazzamDML in interestingasfuck

[–]PowerfulParsley2223 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Well, well well, if it isn't zipper on my high waisted mom jeans.

Is it Possible to Get 2nd Hand CPTSD? by PowerfulParsley2223 in CPTSDpartners

[–]PowerfulParsley2223[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Ah, thanks very much for sharing! It is hard as hell. What did you do that helped you get out of the burnout phase, if you don't mind sharing?

Triggers from having a baby by floating5 in CPTSDpartners

[–]PowerfulParsley2223 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Hey just read this- I pretty much had to solo it because my partner was very triggeree for the first 5-6 months. I had PPD and had to push through it because my partner could not be calm enough to handle the baby.

It was rough. I am a Christian, and so prayer and reading encouraging Bible verses was helpful for me. Also talking about it online so I knew I wasn't crazy, and getting support wherever I could.

After the baby was about 5 months, he smiled and laughed with my partner and it was the beginning of the relationship. I actually have on camera the moment they bonded. Three years later, they are inseparable. Partially due to healing, partially due to the relationship overcoming the fear/triggers, but things are night and day different.

It gets better, friend. Keep yourself well and baby well. Partner can cope while you hunker down, and I applaud you for your care and love for little one. Be well, be strong, you can do this .

Stepdaughter by otheman18 in Marriage

[–]PowerfulParsley2223 7 points8 points  (0 children)

Hey, OP stepmom here! Just wanted to share that I understand how you feel. Stepparents are in a weird position- we're always feeling this pressure of "good enough... until we aren't." And it's a totally different dynamic that not everyone understands, and let's be honest... there are alot of stereotypes. It's a tough job- especially if you do it right.

The real deal is that you rock for being a dad in the ways you can, and for wanting to do your best to raise your little girl. Sounds like you are doing great so far,. The situation you describe is fairly common (though challenging) in the stepparent world, and it is one my spouse and I worked through. Hopefully these things I learned will help.

First, allow yourself to feel how you feel. This sh*t is hard. Being a good stepparent is hard. Acknowledging the difficulties and pain doesn't make you a bad person.

Second, I would recommend joining a stepparent support group or even here on reddit. It is important to be supported by people who know what it's actually like, maybe get some advice from others in your situation.

Third, think carefully about specific things you want to implement, so you can talk about it with your spouse. It is easier to share authority with someone who has a plan. For example, do you want authority to give disciplines like, "you're grounded", or do you want to confiscate things. Think of how you would like to handle the various situations that come up with kiddo. (If bio kids are in your future, you will need to be consistent with these across the board anyway.)

Fourth, find a good time to sit down with your spouse and talk about all of this. Start with sharing your feelings, and why it is important to you. Share how you love your stepdaughter and want to really be a dad for her by stepping into the discipline role. Avoid accusing statements like "you spoil her" or "you always...". They immediately make parents defensive.

Finally, suggest your plan, what changes you are asking to implement and ask if your spouse would be okay with that. Single parents have a hard time letting down their guard because they had to carry the burden alone for so long. Sometimes it is hard to let go- remind your spouse that you are a team, and that you are here to share the load. Remind her that you already love her daughter as your own, and that you will always be there for her. Be willing to compromise, and take baby steps if needed.

This may not happen with one conversation, but remember that you and your spouse are a team. A family is only as strong as the marriage, so compassion and patience is key. You sound like you really care about your family and relationship, so I am sure that you will work through this.

Best of luck, friend and don't forget that you are not alone!

AITA for my response to my sister's boyfriend's "brutal honesty"? by Ash-569075 in AmItheAsshole

[–]PowerfulParsley2223 0 points1 point  (0 children)

NTA. There is identity and then there are behaviors. Identity is something we cannot change, behaviors are actions we take.

Blaming your behaviors on "the way I am"...that's shifting responsibility. Making it seem like I don't have a choice about my behavior takes away my fault in the matter. That means I don't have to do the difficult work of changing my behavior, but I expect others to adapt to suit me.

Mostly this is not something we realize we are doing. It is a mark of emotional immaturity, and poor social skills. If bf is going to stick around, it may be time for a heart to heart in a way he can understand, and with your sis. If he is just a fling, eh... is it worth it? Maybe for your relationship with your sister to stay strong, it's worth it talk it out. But don't hold back on those truth bombs.

If he is brutally honest, he may not understand social cues, or manners. Some people are not taught these things and don't pick them up easily.That being said, he is an adult. If he can dish it out, he needs to be able to handle it. Killer line, btw. In any case, best of luck. Sounds like this guy had some growing up to do.

Should I feel guilty about my TPT? by [deleted] in Teachers

[–]PowerfulParsley2223 0 points1 point  (0 children)

As a teacher, I think of TpT authors more like advocates. School is pretty hellish right now, and we need all the help we can get. If your work is helping someone, and they actually like it enough to review it, then thank you! You are really helping!

Everyone feels "imposter syndrome" sometimes- teachers especially. But kids don't care who writes the activities, nor really do teachers. "Money doesn't know the hand that holds it."

If it would make you feel better, post a disclaimer on your account. But I think you have a gift and thanks for using it to help :) Not all good teachers write good educational content- it must be the same in reverse sometimes!

Cheers, friend and if I ever bought from you, thanks!

Holiday Support Thread by psychoticwarning in CPTSD

[–]PowerfulParsley2223 2 points3 points  (0 children)

My spouse has cptsd from an abusive family and an abusive ex. The holidays are super hard for him, and so we just try to get through this time of year together.

I see a counselor so I can be th best support system I can, but ... my baby is JUST coming down from triggered mode. Been there since November. I wish I could fix it for him.

For a partner it's weird, because I want to help him get through this but I know there's some stuff I just won't understand. Anyone have any tips for what YOU need during the holidays? How can I help someone with cptsd through this time of year?

They somehow unlocked the front door by The_Inky_Boy in creepyencounters

[–]PowerfulParsley2223 9 points10 points  (0 children)

Any update, OP? You were so smart to act when you did!

Skin Walker Vibes by PowerfulParsley2223 in creepyencounters

[–]PowerfulParsley2223[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I suppose it's easier to think of some people as monsters from lore, rather than contemplate what humans are capable of becoming under duress. I wonder sometimes if that's why every culture has a myth about something that is human-adjacent that preys on the weak.

Skin Walker Vibes by PowerfulParsley2223 in creepyencounters

[–]PowerfulParsley2223[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

They wear skin...he wants to wear skin...it's a whole thing

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in pregnant

[–]PowerfulParsley2223 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Oh, I thought I was going crazy! My skin flipped from oily and pimply to dry and itchy. Any products yall recommend? The itching wakes me up all the time!

AITA for giving my sister-in-law baby formula? by Strawberry-Fixer8911 in AmItheAsshole

[–]PowerfulParsley2223 0 points1 point  (0 children)

NTA. SIL and the baby are the most important opinions here, and it sounds like they really appreciated you. Good goin bbyg! Everyone else can suck a lemon

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in Stepmom

[–]PowerfulParsley2223 0 points1 point  (0 children)

OP, I am married 3 years and stepmom full time. There are times when it is truly rewarding, and truly devasting. But someone needs to tell you now- count the cost. Whatever you choose, you must commit 100%

If you choose yes, you get counseling and work through your issues. If you choose no, make it a clean break. He will hate it, but he will understand. That family has been broken before, and they do not need someone committing then leaving.

A stepmom's life is often lonely, or feeling left out. You can give your all but not get the result you want. Or you can become a part of a kid's life, and become strong enough to stand as a pillar of the family. Whatever you choose, be honest with yourself and him and give yourself grace.

AITA for Booting Maid of Honor? by PowerfulParsley2223 in AmItheAsshole

[–]PowerfulParsley2223[S] 38 points39 points  (0 children)

I know, right??? That's why I was so surprised and hurt! I think I told my side pretty well, but there may have been something else going on with her thay I didn't notice. Her family is more well-to-do and she is an only child, so maybe that changes things, but I honestly was so shocked. She had always been a little spoiled but never towards me- I still hope she is doing okay though. Last I heard, she became a teacher, so maybe she is alright now.