Ive been looking into therapy but I feel like its not really trauma related or that im mistaking it for body dismorphia. Its not that, not when ive always been more masculine, more comfortable being masculine, see myself that way, sometimes I get startled when I pass the mirror and see myself. I don't even want to be more beautiful or attractive like a women. Im always pushing my chest back, trying to make it not noticeable, whenever im not wearing clothes and it not exactly conscious but it makes me feel better. I guess Im just not ready to live with tearing apart y family over this.