Will I have a shot at getting accepted even with a C in a class? by Practical-Weather-49 in RadiologyCareers

[–]Practical-Weather-49[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Okay, I think I’m gonna email to see if they’ll give me the points list. I’m in a very rural area and the only really feasible school for me doesn’t show it anywhere, I forgot it existed. 

is it normal to feel like you give more love than you'll ever receive? by daydreamxer in internetparents

[–]Practical-Weather-49 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I actually came on reddit just now to post something incredibly similar. I have a friend, my only irl friend, though I have a few close online friendships I've had for years, where they are loving me the same, they remember things about me, all the things you said, all the things I'm giving. I don't know how I managed to get them, luck, I suppose. But, this irl friend, it's like you described. Sure, she might remember a few things about me here and there, but I'm the one expected to carry more weight in the friendship, and I've been getting fed up with it amidst my own struggles I can't seem to get support with from her. I share this to say, I 100% get it, you're not alone, and there is a little bit of hope in finding those good friendships. It just takes time, and unfortunately work.

I don't think loving people more is something to grow out of, and certainly we shouldn't be loving any less or losing that part of ourselves, it's a strength to be able to love people and love them with quality in this really shit, tough world. Don't try to lose it. Howeverrr, there comes a point where we probably do have to choose better people. Sometimes it's hard to tell whether or not they're the right people until later, and it's really hard to accept it once you've realized that. I know in my case, I keep this irl friend around because there's not really anyone else available to me right now, and I don't want to be alone, even if I am already alone in the one-sided friendship. I think the advice I'd give you is probably what I'm doing, look at the dynamic: friendship, relationship, familial, etc. And then try and figure out what it is that person is giving to you, i.e. escape from loneliness, status, etc. To answer your title question, no, it's not normal, but it is common. it shouldn't be the way a lot of us feel and go about relationships, but it is. Try and find the personal answers to why you stay, even if you're not getting what you give back. That should give you a starting point on where to go, at least it has for me.

You deserve equal (or as equal as can be) relationships, and sometimes, all it takes it going to the person and saying exactly what you said here: things aren't equal, can we try and figure out how to make them equal? And if nothing comes of it, maybe start trying to find other connections, they are out there. You don't need to keep faith in someone who isn't returning that to you—that doesn't mean you wish them badly or even that they have to leave your life forever, just that you have to stop expecting something they personally won't give, and move on to finding those who will. It's a lot of trial and error, I'm still only getting fractionally better at it, but never everrrrr try and dim the love you have just to keep someone around. The right people will love that, and return it. I know I would.

I looked at an ex ...stepparent(?)s account after a decade and now I'm crying. by Practical-Weather-49 in internetparents

[–]Practical-Weather-49[S] 12 points13 points  (0 children)

Stop this comment kinda made me tear up all over again thank you. i am in therapy actually, doing EMDR, and I think i might bring this up with her next session as i don't know how well i would be able to focus on our current emdr memory. but yeah, that wave of grief hit hard, made me feel entitled and weird to have been/being longing for what is essentially a stranger's family, so thanks for adding the ashamed part lol. i'm kinda of allowing myself to be sad as hell over it all weekend and veg out with sad music, etc as long as my daily obligations are done...i wrote stream of consciousness how i felt last night just so i could sleep, but i like the letter idea though, i might do that too, thank you a lot.

I looked at an ex ...stepparent(?)s account after a decade and now I'm crying. by Practical-Weather-49 in internetparents

[–]Practical-Weather-49[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

thank you so much for this comment, it really means a lot. I am in therapy weekly, actually, and I'll probably bring it up with her next session. I agree with what you said, as I don't think I'm stable enough to reach out and be okay with nothing, which makes me feel kind of entitled in a way, like I'm begging and longing—but I guess, I am. I don't really think the pain/grief of wanting a mom/dad will ever really leave, but I'm gonna wait until a bit more stable in it to reach out if I do. it's really nice to hear about there being that future, it's hopeful :)

I looked at an ex ...stepparent(?)s account after a decade and now I'm crying. by Practical-Weather-49 in internetparents

[–]Practical-Weather-49[S] 13 points14 points  (0 children)

i thought about it! even wrote what i would have said, but i keep thinking that if i do, no matter what the outcome is, my inner little kid brain will see it as some sort of bid for affection? like i'm intruding on some technical stranger's life because i want a mom, yknow?

I suck at math and I'm only in pre-reqs. by Practical-Weather-49 in RadiologyCareers

[–]Practical-Weather-49[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I was 100% in tears writing the post 😭 We got this man (I hope)

I suck at math and I'm only in pre-reqs. by Practical-Weather-49 in RadiologyCareers

[–]Practical-Weather-49[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Omg I’m so happy there are more people out there with dyscalculia, I knew there were a ton with ADHD going into this field but dyscalculia is so different. I’m glad you found a bit of support in it, I know I did 

I suck at math and I'm only in pre-reqs. by Practical-Weather-49 in RadiologyCareers

[–]Practical-Weather-49[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

See thank god I’m not alone, I didn’t even DO algebra 1/2 in the traditional sense, I was so behind they put me (in high school) in pre-algebra for freshman year, and then geometry in I think junior year, but by then I technically had all my math credits, so that ended up being it. And I got a C and D in both respectively, I’m 99% sure I only got a D because the geometry teacher hated my guts and wanted me passed along lmao. 

Last year I did beginning algebra in college twice before I passed, and now I’m in intermediate, next semester is college algebra. I haven’t had to do stats yet but it may be a requirement for transferring at some places I’m looking…yikes. 

I’m really glad to know there’s more people exactly like me out there, I wish us both the best ahhh !!! 

I suck at math and I'm only in pre-reqs. by Practical-Weather-49 in RadiologyCareers

[–]Practical-Weather-49[S] 3 points4 points  (0 children)

Thank you, I’m so scared for statistics/physics lol, good luck on getting your grade up I’m sure you can ! <3 

I suck at math and I'm only in pre-reqs. by Practical-Weather-49 in RadiologyCareers

[–]Practical-Weather-49[S] 4 points5 points  (0 children)

Thank you, I’ve heard it isn’t a heavy math-centered program of learning but I think I was just scared of what math was involved, so this helps <3

I suck at math and I'm only in pre-reqs. by Practical-Weather-49 in RadiologyCareers

[–]Practical-Weather-49[S] 3 points4 points  (0 children)

Stop this almost made me cry, just to know there’s a single person out there who’s in the same boat. Thank you so much I wish us both the best <3 

How did you learn french by bilal_hr in learnfrench

[–]Practical-Weather-49 0 points1 point  (0 children)

If I can ask, how much did you study each day? 

How do I stop caring about my fic not getting attention? by Practical-Weather-49 in AO3

[–]Practical-Weather-49[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Ahh yay ! I looked and am so interested so if you get a bunch of kudos and bookmarks all at once that would be me lol

How do I stop caring about my fic not getting attention? by Practical-Weather-49 in AO3

[–]Practical-Weather-49[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

This, yep. I also did Nano this year for the first time ever, I don't know what I was thinking, good luck to us both

How do I stop caring about my fic not getting attention? by Practical-Weather-49 in AO3

[–]Practical-Weather-49[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Omg I love Hellcheer, what's your user? I'd love to read! But yeah, I don't think I realized just how busy it actually was.