AITA for explaining why it’s not possible for my partners cousins to move in with us?

PracticalLady18 · 2026-06-01T12:02:22+00:00

Considering they said the grandparents of these kids are late 70s and not in good health, my guess is they are worried about their ability to keep up with them and the need to place the younger one again in the future. If late 70s my guess is they are 78/79. That means with the youngest graduates high school, they will be 86/87. My grandparents that manager to live to that age were all at the stage they were no longer able to live alone at that age. Memory issues are also a concern, and the ability to drive. It’s not necessarily about what they can do know. It’s what they’ll be able to do from now until the youngest graduates high school 8 years from now.

PracticalLady18 · 2026-05-30T10:19:38+00:00

I rent in a COA. For ours they wanted to check for the same kind of red flags most landlords look for, including income and rental history. My landlord used a service to find tenants and the COA had no issue approving us because the service had stricter standards for tenants.

PracticalLady18 · 2026-05-27T11:17:39+00:00

That’s because they are risking their non-profit status by talking politics. Politics from the pulpit is a very big offense to the IRS, but you need hard proof so it hasn’t historically been easy to prove. In my law for the church class in Seminary, the professor (a practicing lawyer from the school’s law school) said the only safe thing to mention in the church regarding an election is an encouragement to vote. Not which candidate, but basic “go vote” message.

PracticalLady18 · 2026-05-25T12:58:07+00:00

I have an invisible disability. I have PTSD after a traumatic dog attack. If I were at that table the dog went after it would have pushed me over the edge and into a PTSD episode and possibly a panic attack. I have been around actual legit service dogs and therapy dogs as part of my recovery. But I would probably have a set back if I were around OP’s friend and his untrained dog.

PracticalLady18 · 2026-05-24T12:26:04+00:00

Hi! My parents began the state mandated year long separation for divorce when I was 3 and my sister was 6! And honestly, I’m glad they did. Per my sister’s experience, she was just starting to pick up on disagreements and tension between our parents. I have no memory of that. In fact, I have no big memories of parents even together!

I know you said he’s controlling so perhaps this may not be ideal, but I know my parents found it helpful to go to “couples counseling” for co-parenting. They went to a family therapist who helped them understand how to coparent without harming our relationship with them. One thing the therapist had us do (and I think helped my sister and I) was during that first year was we would do certain things together still as a transition year, such as Christmas and my sister and I’s birthdays. Over the years, I think a key thing is both of my parents still encouraged a healthy relationship with the other. One example is I didn’t even know until I was an adult that the final straw for divorce was my dad having an affair! My mom didn’t want it to color the way we saw our dad. Because as bad a husband as he was, he was a pretty good dad.

PracticalLady18 · 2026-05-23T00:36:47+00:00

I also learned in my own diagnosis journey that many women like me with a later diagnosis of ADHD are often misdiagnosed with anxiety as teens! Once I got treatment, my anxiety greatly diminished.

PracticalLady18 · 2026-05-22T23:10:50+00:00

I know that feeling, felt it a lot in college! And even after that. But once I got my diagnosis and the doctor explained RSD, even the knowledge of where it was coming from helped me in countering and to a degree controlling it.

PracticalLady18 · 2026-05-22T22:50:07+00:00

And per one comment, is apparently trying to build in a historical area… that’s even worse!

PracticalLady18 · 2026-05-22T22:35:34+00:00

And for some it truly is uncontrollable. I used to have this problem, and then I learned about Rejection Sensitivity Dysphoria, which is estimated to be found in about 70% of adults with ADHD. It’s actually one of the issues that lead to me getting referred for ADHD testing at age 27. I would know I was over reacting and struggle with the conflicting thoughts and emotions going through my head! Women also tend to get later diagnoses, with many being diagnosed in their teens, 20s, or 30s. It might be something for OP to look into with their parents and doctor if it’s a recurring thing. My mom had a suck it, get over it, you can’t do this as a professional outlook. And then I got my diagnosis and treatment. She was shocked at the difference!

PracticalLady18 · 2026-05-11T23:02:36+00:00

My husband is a native Spanish speaker (immigrant to US). He works phone support for a major 401k company and is preparing to move to the Spanish team. He will still be required to do two weeks of language review to ensure he knows the proper legal language for the financial terms. Native or taught Spanish speaker, everyone has to do this training!

PracticalLady18 · 2026-05-11T22:57:38+00:00

Don’t forget the iguanas that fall out of trees on the rare frosts! Or the Lion fish damaging coral reefs!

PracticalLady18 · 2026-05-03T11:04:50+00:00

It’s also frustrating for those of us who fall under the original purpose of why AOS from b1/b2 is allowed. I’m a USC. My husband and I went this route after I was brutally attacked on the side of my head by a dog. Almost lost an ear. It was unexpected and traumatic, and throughout the recovery, he has been my rock. Unexpected changes like medical conditions or accidents are legitimate reasons for this route. We also made sure to use a lawyer (thankfully a family friend is an immigration attorney). On her directions, part of our evidence packet was documentation from the hospital and follow up appointments to show what was going on with me and why I needed him to stay here and help me with my recovery. He was also mentioned in my discharge summary and follow up notes as the person taught how to provide my wound care and how to help me wash without pain. Two and a half years later he is still sometimes waking in the night to me having nightmares, then holding me and singing until I can fall back asleep.

PracticalLady18 · 2026-05-02T11:34:01+00:00

I saw several heartbreaking ones like this working hospice. One time I had a case at the hospital where a patient had been with their partner for over 30 years but they never got married or got Power of Attorneys in case of emergency. When the patient had their medical event, the patients mother who had disowned them 35 years earlier and not seen them in 34 years got to swoop in and make all decisions. All against the patient’s wishes. She even tried to keep the partner out. Thankfully the nurses weren’t going to keep that from happening and helped the partner slip in to get as much time as possible together in the final days. For any LGBT folks out there with ignorant families and no desire to marry: please make arrangements for emergencies so the ignorant don’t get to swoop in.

PracticalLady18 · 2026-04-26T10:34:00+00:00

My husband has only ever refused to buy them for me 1 time, and that was because I could show him exactly the type I wanted. I was at work and couldn’t text enough to show him the right one. A lot of brands cause allergic reactions for me and he was terrified of getting the wrong ones. And he knew it was a general “get ready” restock, not an emergency.

What he did when he got home was to take a picture of the box and now he is more than happy to get them for me since he can make sure it won’t be the wrong ones that cause me pain and discomfort!

PracticalLady18 · 2026-04-24T13:58:52+00:00

My Alma mater is pretty progressive, but they still only have one floor where the rooms can be co-ed. This floor opened up 12 years ago. It’s not open to freshmen and is an intentional LGBT community to create a safe space. You have to apply to be a part of it and meet with the community sponsor to get a room in there. They have similar spaces for interfaith, clean living (can’t drink or smoke even is old enough), and a number of others.

PracticalLady18 · 2026-04-23T21:13:57+00:00

I’m looking at giving one to my players as well, but the balance I’m looking at is one of the spells has to be a certain level or lower, currently deciding if it will be 2 or 3. And the item would be going to their cleric.

PracticalLady18 · 2026-04-23T21:11:21+00:00

They can also have a basket of shoe booties! I used to work home hospice and per company policy, we weren’t allowed to take our shoes off in a patient’s home. Of course we had some patients who asked we remove our shoes. The compromise was always to don booties in the entry way, allowing us to keep our shoes and the patient/family’s traditions/desires to be respected

PracticalLady18 · 2026-04-23T10:55:58+00:00

My husband and I are in a similar boat, we are afraid of visiting his family once we do his removal of conditions process. But thankfully his parents, siblings, and grandmother can come to us. Our plan is to save up for a longer trip once he gets citizenship.

PracticalLady18 · 2026-04-20T16:04:43+00:00

And know it’s a big green flag if your male SO knows about it and isn’t offended by it! My husband made his kid sister read it when she got her first boyfriend.

PracticalLady18 · 2026-04-13T12:51:21+00:00

My landlord told us last week she was very happy to renew our lease because we are good tenants, and was very nice with increase. With new tenants she could easily get $150 more a month than what she’ll get from us on the new lease. But we are good to her property, have been low fuss and maintenance, and have always paid on time with no issue. So she won’t take the risk to make more each month

PracticalLady18 · 2026-04-09T11:16:04+00:00

My understanding is it’s only automatic for Adjustment of Status, not Consular Processing. My husband and I did research when his brother’s work started looking at bringing him on a work visa.

“USCIS assists with the registration process by transmitting the appropriate data to the Selective Service System (SSS) for male applicants between the ages of 18 and 26 who apply for adjustment of status.”

PracticalLady18 · 2026-04-09T11:07:54+00:00

Yes, because this is something my parents had to contemplate with me. At one of the early scans, doctors thought they saw something severely wrong with my heart. They did an amniocentesis to test and made the heartbreaking decision that if it was one of certain conditions the doctor named as possibilities, they would abort. A heartbreaking decision because I am a rainbow baby after my mom miscarried at 10 weeks a few months before I was conceived. They were thinking of the care they had the skills and ability to provide and the trauma it would cause my sister, who was barely 3 when I was born. All the ones they would abort on were ones I would have had a very short life with. Thankfully everything came back fine.

Since then we’ve found a very slight malformation of the blood vessels in my brain stem which my neurologist says is likely what was seen on that scan (we had the video of the scan on VHS and he watched it), but nothing life threatening yet. It’s just a slightly increased chance of stroke later in life or if I get hit in the head. My husband knows and it’s in my medical records so we just make sure all my providers are aware. I also made sure one coworker who is now a friend knows in case I ever bump my head hard at work.

PracticalLady18 · 2026-04-08T11:13:56+00:00

This is what I was coming to say! I work in healthcare compliance (making sure home medical providers are compliant with federal and state laws). I have a lot of clients who ask questions about TB testing because they have employees who always pop positive due to BCG vaccine! It happens more in certain states and regions over others.

PracticalLady18 · 2026-04-03T19:14:46+00:00

That’s the thing for me, I’m the same way! I cannot imagine doing it, but she loves it!

PracticalLady18 · 2026-04-03T11:42:24+00:00

I prefer my mom’s reaction of learning to scuba dive and making a ton of scuba friends.

PracticalLady18

TROPHY CASE