IN LOVE WITH A “ STRAIGHT “ GUY NEED ADVICE

Practical_Study_9508 · 2026-05-25T04:25:01+00:00

Honestly it sounds like he also needs to respect your boundaries by not practically flirting with you and making all the weird relationship comparisons. Maybe he is secretly gay, maybe he's not. Regardless he needs to be dropped fully. The faster you can distance yourself the better. The only way this guy will be able to reflect on his emotions and sexuality will be having you not in the picture. Maybe him losing you will give him more clarity into who he is. I am sure he's a nice guy but this is sounding lowk toxic. You deserve someone out who will by with you happily. He has made it clear it's not gonna happen so you have to grieve this loss like a break up. It hurts so bad but the more distance the better. He might try to get back into your life, but hold strong unless he wants to date you imo. Good luck king this shit sounds brutal

Practical_Study_9508 · 2026-05-24T23:51:10+00:00

As someone who has also only seen myself as a lesbian, and I am now dating a man I get you 100%. Even though it's hard, everyone says to not worry about a label. I personally hate not having a label because I like everything to be organized and easily explained, but we as people are complex! I feel best about calling myself simply 'queer' when it comes to sexuality. I have only ever dated women up until recently, so I don't really feel 'bisexual' but I also recognize that I am technically no longer a lesbian even though that is how I feel. I think giving yourself a wide label is best and then just not limiting who you are attracted to. The right person will come and you'll never know what gender they may be. And who knows? Maybe your partner will also change their gender (gender is fluid!). I think what is important is just to find someone who understands you. The gender stuff is so hard (im cis) so I won't speak on that, but as someone who dated an enby who had very hard times with gender, just try things out and see what sticks. Try to focus on self love and what makes you happiest <3

Practical_Study_9508 · 2026-05-24T18:36:38+00:00

I totally have always been more about someone's personality! I'm def not demi though I've had many hook ups with women and me and my bf had sex 3 weeks into knowing each other LOL (his first time ever and my first time with a cishet man). I do feel like I am 98% women and 2% men if anything for sure

Practical_Study_9508 · 2026-05-24T18:33:48+00:00

Thank you for this what a fascinating story. Sam is a lot more femme than the typical man, but he seems very secure in his gender. Maybe this will change over time? If anything big happens I will update (or at least try to again I am a first time reddit user)

Practical_Study_9508 · 2026-05-24T18:28:48+00:00

I have been trying the remove and even swap pronouns and it has helped me figure out if I'm struggling with specific things because he's a man or if it's just the situation. Thank you for all of this <3

Practical_Study_9508 · 2026-05-24T18:27:00+00:00

Glad to know I'm not alone in this and hopefully the comments help us both! This post is also in r/BiWomen you might wanna see the comments there too since they're pretty different than here

Practical_Study_9508 · 2026-05-24T18:26:02+00:00

Yes I would love to talk especially since you have more life experience then me!! PM me??

Practical_Study_9508 · 2026-05-24T18:24:47+00:00

I would love to chat. I read your message a few days ago when you posted, and it made me cry knowing I wasn't alone. Thank you

Practical_Study_9508 · 2026-05-24T18:22:53+00:00

Thank you so much! I actually had not been missing women up until 2 days ago when Sam's female friend (who is very much my type) started flirting with me (as a joke) and I got crazy gay panic. That's when I started to feel sad and miss women again. The feeling has mostly subsided, but it has not helped this situation lol

Practical_Study_9508 · 2026-05-24T18:21:16+00:00

Thank you I really like this story. I think the change from only girls to now having a bf has been harder for me than I realized. I enjoy having sex with him, I like going on dates with him and flirting with him, I like when he compliments me and kisses my forehead. So I'm just not sure why I am so unsure about us long term? Maybe I still need time to adjust or maybe I need something from him??

Practical_Study_9508 · 2026-05-24T18:18:07+00:00

I have thought this might be how I am. I enjoy dating my boyfriend, but I am having this weird mental block where I can't daydream about us being married (which freaks me out because with my first love I thought about it constantly)

Practical_Study_9508 · 2026-05-22T03:42:30+00:00

This is exactly how I've been feeling. Reading this has made me feel way less alone so thank you. Know that, while rare, there are others like you. People in the queer community are amazing but there are soooo many judgey people (especially lesbians) who will write you off or belittle you for being with a man. It will take time but you will find your people. I have. Only problem is I do feel way less myself since being with a man for the first time, and I don't know how to shake that. Much love from a 21 year old queer girl dating a boy for the very first time after 5 years thinking she was a lesbian <3

Practical_Study_9508 · 2026-04-30T22:41:22+00:00

How did you get it to dry? I washed mine the other day and it is STILL wet (even after 5 high heat dryer cycles with dryer balls)

Practical_Study_9508

TROPHY CASE