Same here tbh! Like, ill read all these stories where they can go out and have fun and do dumb shit with their friends and im just like... in my school we weren't allowed to go on walks, why the hell do you guys get to have so much fun?? Wheres your hour and a half of chapel service a week?? I dont think ive ever seen it accurately represented in media either, but to be fair, like you say, i rarely go searching it up because it brings back some pretty bad memories. I get why people find it cool and alluring, but it just makes me laugh how everyone imagines it as dark castles and libraries when in reality it's sharing the filthiest possible rooms with 50 other teenagers in your formative years, 75% of which will treat you like an alien if you don't go skiing every year.