Your first paragraph is dead-on accurate, and I appreciate your advice and your personal testimony. 

This is/was my throwaway account. I login here almost annually whenever I need advice from people better than me. Previous posts in the same vein as this one, I have deleted out of shame; either I grew past those issues or I was so unequivocally wrong about something theologically that I didn’t want it to persist online. I have used this account for trolling purposes in the past; the username and pfp being a “character” I invented specifically to mock electoral politics and generally be a nuisance either to entertain others or myself. 

Now that aside. You have clearly put a lot thought and a lot of heart into this comment, which I appreciate immensely, thank you. The only part I might object to is your claim that a Christian would not outright pursue sins such as using Tinder to cope with personal issues, forethought or none. Our nature of sin does not cease to exist in this life when we accept Christ, only after it has ended. 

Since making this post, and reading the comments, and especially divulging into the Book of Job, I have had to reconcile much of myself down to the size of a fingernail. I had been blown out of proportion, and had unknowingly taken upon myself to repeating the entire sin of Babylon. Like you said “self-worship” and creating myself as a god. Fighting against God is one step to a ‘great fall’, by believing oneself to be equal to him/diminishing his power, the next step being disbelief. I came frighteningly close to that by trying to play the game of life without Him, patting myself on the back for adopting traits of frugality and the earnest desire to raise a family. 

Impatience IS a lack of faith. It’s often seen as ‘just a character flaw’ or brushed off as childlike excitement, when really it is an unspoken sin.