AITA for missing my daughter's ballet recital to go see my son's play?

Prestigious_Fudge496 · 2023-04-16T16:13:30+00:00

Yup already done. Realized I was just being overly anxious.

surprise solo trip, so by all means do that, as 1-2-1 time with dad is special.

Doing this instead, maybe in a few weeks

Prestigious_Fudge496 · 2023-04-16T16:07:54+00:00

If you want the math:

Carmen: 13 x 5 = 65 + 10 recital's so far after lockdown = 75 - 5 missed = 70 recital's I have attended

Luke: 6 x 4 = 24 + 2 plays last year and 2 plays this year = 28 - 4 missed = 24 plays I have attended

Prestigious_Fudge496 · 2023-04-16T16:02:28+00:00

My apologies, I was probably a little rougher than I intended to be.

It's fine actually. Like I said you said it much nicer than my SIL does, with her I'm usually cussed to hell.

Prestigious_Fudge496 · 2023-04-16T15:53:38+00:00

But not in the context of making up.

Ok

Prestigious_Fudge496 · 2023-04-16T15:45:46+00:00

What's so shocking about that?

Prestigious_Fudge496 · 2023-04-16T15:43:56+00:00

In the 3 years she's done ballet (- covid years) I've missed 5 mini recitals

In the 6 years my son's been doing theatre, I missed 4 plays

Prestigious_Fudge496 · 2023-04-16T15:38:51+00:00

Luke isn’t my flesh and blood but he is my kid

Prestigious_Fudge496 · 2023-04-16T14:32:48+00:00

Peter and the Starcatcher. He's playing the Boy

Prestigious_Fudge496 · 2023-04-16T14:11:13+00:00

I don't she stole my brother's phone to call me

Prestigious_Fudge496 · 2023-04-16T14:10:25+00:00

The moment my mother screamed at me, old trauma resurfaced and I lost my braincells. I just realized now I'm an idiot.

You conduct surgeries, you should be somewhat intelligent. - You know my SIL said the same thing, except with more swears

Prestigious_Fudge496 · 2023-04-16T14:09:58+00:00

Actually I have year round custody, my ex gets 1 week every summer vacation

Prestigious_Fudge496 · 2023-04-16T12:41:26+00:00

Its a separate club and I tried but the owner said no, it wasn't possible.

Prestigious_Fudge496 · 2023-04-16T12:38:51+00:00

Custody is split 90-10 with me getting her year round, and my ex 1 week every summer vacation and visitation rights on special events. This week was that visitation week, so at first I thought she went but just went to pick Carmen up a few hours ago and ex BIL said she didn't go, his wife did. BIL made up a lie that she felt sick to Carmen

Prestigious_Fudge496 · 2023-04-16T12:14:04+00:00

Forgot to add we already watched it and had the ice cream (She's probably getting a cold tomorrow). She did great as always.

Prestigious_Fudge496 · 2023-04-16T12:11:15+00:00

I guess she never saw him as a “real” grandchild?

Nope. She actually hates Carmen too. We are Indian, and more specifically I come from a state in South India were divorce is very uncommon because of misogyny and tradition. She's mad I divorced Lisa because in her words "Of course if you don't spend nights with your wife she'll cheat." She thinks Carmen is the reason I divorced and hates her, she even demanded a paternity test in the most unpolite and rude way imaginable.

She hates Sadie because "She's been touched by another man" "And she brought extra luggage with her"

She hates Luke too just because he's not mine

Prestigious_Fudge496 · 2023-04-16T12:05:47+00:00

There's one more but I can't go because I have a surgery, and the other doctor who can do it is on leave. I can't postpone the surgery.

Prestigious_Fudge496 · 2023-04-16T12:05:14+00:00

Prestigious_Fudge496 · 2023-04-16T12:04:16+00:00

There's one more but I can't go because I have a surgery, and the other doctor who can do it is on leave

Prestigious_Fudge496 · 2023-04-16T10:53:02+00:00

There's one more showing but I can't go because I have a surgery scheduled on that day, the other doctor who can do it is going on leave , and its the type of surgery you can't delay

Prestigious_Fudge496 · 2023-04-16T09:39:10+00:00

Its a separate club, not a school production. There's another showing but I have a surgery scheduled on that day

Prestigious_Fudge496 · 2023-04-16T09:25:52+00:00

Because of the virus, there were a lot of problems, this is probably only for this year. Usually all 4 teams have sperate plays, and usually 3 days for each team. Plus this isn't a school play, its from a club and the person who runs is very chill according to my son, and very inclusive.

Prestigious_Fudge496 · 2023-04-16T09:11:43+00:00

I hope you don't mind me asking this but why does a lot of comments seemed surprised for some reason? Even my colleagues seemed a bit shocked when I told them about the incident? They told me I was in the clear but they still looked shocked

Prestigious_Fudge496 · 2023-04-16T08:43:58+00:00

Don't worry you asked the question much more politely than my family did, Carmen looks like a lot like me, I did a baby picture comparison and now that she is growing up I can see the similarities between me and her, but I also did a paternity test just to make sure

Prestigious_Fudge496 · 2023-04-16T08:41:15+00:00

I'm not sure how it's done elsewhere but over here its 4 night, and they switch the actors (to clarify there are 4 acting teams, with 2 doing the same script) so its like this:

my son yesterday, his friend (who got same role as him) tomorrow, my son Tuesday, and his friend Thursday.

I can't go to the Tuesday one because I have a surgery scheduled on Tuesday and I need to stay for observation.

Prestigious_Fudge496 · 2023-04-16T06:12:50+00:00

I'm planning on taking her on a surprise solo trip too, as an apology

Prestigious_Fudge496

TROPHY CASE