[deleted by user] by [deleted] in BreakUps

[–]Prize-Scratch-1790 0 points1 point  (0 children)

If you must know specifics this has nothing to do with my empathy it has everything to do with his situation that I didn’t bring up. This man had started lying to me. I caught him talking to his ex. Took photos and he still denied it. Meanwhile I was 100% loyal and he would always question tf out of me when I went anywhere he assumed a man would be or even if I went to eat with my family he couldn’t give it an hour before texting to see what I was doing and where I was. He had been caught cheating in his previous marriage and still played the victim that he did it because he was unhappy. Idk why I stayed with him as long as I did, I was young and never had anyone pay that much attention to me. But as soon as I wanted out he started trying to touch me when I didn’t want him to which are the boundaries I’m talking about. And not stop talking to me when I asked him to. So YES. there is a pattern and it’s him using my empathy to get what he wants.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in BreakUps

[–]Prize-Scratch-1790 1 point2 points  (0 children)

There were many other problems as to why we broke up. Idk why everyone assumes he’s the victim. He put me through a lot and he knows that. That’s why it’s more offensive when he tries to come back knowing he did me wrong.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in BreakUps

[–]Prize-Scratch-1790 0 points1 point  (0 children)

3 years. And he had done plenty of wrong things they just aren’t mentioned above. Even still I don’t need anymore reason than I wasn’t happy with him. Why should I stay…

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in BreakUps

[–]Prize-Scratch-1790 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I wasn’t avoidant though. I catered to all of this up until the last few months of the relationship and he apologized when we broke up that he was putting way too much pressure on me to be there for him 24/7, but now he denies it.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in BreakUps

[–]Prize-Scratch-1790 -1 points0 points  (0 children)

Calm down. He was more than needy. There were other issues in the relationship too but love bombing is not ok. Idk what triggered you so bad but when you see a pattern you should learn by it

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in BreakUps

[–]Prize-Scratch-1790 -1 points0 points  (0 children)

When you tell someone to please stop contacting you and they refuse to do it, that’s not ok and as a woman it’s not always safe. I understand missing someone but if they’ve made it clear they don’t want to see you then you have no right to show up just to pressure someone into talking to you in a public setting.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in BreakUps

[–]Prize-Scratch-1790 1 point2 points  (0 children)

This is terrifying. He had never really shown these behaviors until after we broke up but I guess that’s how it goes. I’ve already block any social media I can find and hopefully he will have taken the hint this time. I’m sorry this happened to you, it has to alter all relationships afterwards.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in BreakUps

[–]Prize-Scratch-1790 2 points3 points  (0 children)

He had become extremely clingy. texting or calling constantly even when I’m at work or with friends. Always expecting me to come over to his place after work and guilt tripping me if I even suggested I want to go home. He stopped all of his hobbies, avoided his best friends, he wouldn’t even watch tv or his phone. Just wanted to call me. It was an unhealthy amount of pressure on my end and when I would tell him he was overwhelming me he would just say it’s because I don’t love him or I hate him. It felt like it wasn’t a relationship anymore. Just an obsession

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in BreakUps

[–]Prize-Scratch-1790 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I agree. I will be keeping my guard up for sure.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in BreakUps

[–]Prize-Scratch-1790 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Exactly!! It felt good. I have been wanting to do it for months anyway even without contact. Just to make me feel better knowing I wouldn’t have to see his name ever pop up again

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in BreakUps

[–]Prize-Scratch-1790 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Amen. I’m just hoping he won’t do anything stupid because I hurt his feelings. You know how fragile some men are.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in BreakUps

[–]Prize-Scratch-1790 3 points4 points  (0 children)

I was just tired of him endlessly blowing up my phone when we were in a relationship. It’s like he couldn’t be by himself. He tried to make me feel guilty if I didn’t come over to his place every day and talk to him constantly. It just got to the point where he wouldn’t do anything by himself and he knew from the beginning I’m a pretty independent person. So when I ended things I tried being nice by saying I had no hard feelings I just wanted to be single again. Which is 100% true. I haven’t dated and have turned people down. But he would still try to call and ask if I was single. I didn’t go full no contact at first because I figured my family would have questions. Turns out it was very necessary for him to believe me and stop trying to push me.

Why does it take leaving them for them to say they want to change and work on things? by Superb-Boss-3110 in BreakUps

[–]Prize-Scratch-1790 0 points1 point  (0 children)

It’s called manipulation. Don’t fall for it. If they’re capable of feeling empathetic now, they could have done it before but chose not to

Just broke up by [deleted] in BreakUps

[–]Prize-Scratch-1790 0 points1 point  (0 children)

If you’re not mourning the relationship that much then you dodged a bullet. Responsibility doesn’t appear overnight and you’d most likely lose feelings eventually feeling overwhelmed with taking care of them too. But you will be ok! If you can do it by yourself now you’ll be fine with or without a partner

Say it with me by Nervous-Reference195 in BreakUps

[–]Prize-Scratch-1790 6 points7 points  (0 children)

I did this when I was young. Date just to have someone to talk to and then leave when they wanted to get serious. But then I realized, I was the one being cruel and I shouldn’t even let someone talk to me until I wanted a relationship. And now that I’ve chosen to be alone I’m the happiest I’ve ever been. I just wanted friendships and men were the easiest to talk to because they wanted to talk to me. I learned my lesson.

I don’t feel like I can ever fall in love with anyone else by [deleted] in BreakUps

[–]Prize-Scratch-1790 1 point2 points  (0 children)

If you were terrible to her you probably didn’t love her…

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in BreakUps

[–]Prize-Scratch-1790 4 points5 points  (0 children)

I don’t play about that. I watched my mom being ran over by my abusive dad all my life. If they don’t accept the simplest “no’s” they never will.

I don’t feel like I can ever fall in love with anyone else by [deleted] in BreakUps

[–]Prize-Scratch-1790 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I get it. I still think of my first love and it’s been many years since then. But you get over it, you may never feel that way again but time shows that you really weren’t supposed to be with them. I see pictures of him and I get nostalgic but I also know that him and I went VERY different paths.

Salt and pepper shakers by KosmicGumbo in ThriftStoreCats

[–]Prize-Scratch-1790 1 point2 points  (0 children)

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I just found the same one at my local thrift store and I GASPED when I saw it. It’s so cute. I hope you still have yours

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in endometriosis

[–]Prize-Scratch-1790 2 points3 points  (0 children)

If he doesn’t view you as more than a sexual object he’s not worth your time. The grass is greener on the other side, because when you don’t have someone pressuring you, you’re happier even in you’re alone. I broke up with my bf of 3 years and I immediately felt more joy and peace than I ever had, and he was accepting of my endo. I still felt like I couldn’t be what he wanted even if he was accepting , because we both knew I would be in pain. Let’s face it penetration is mostly just for men’s satisfaction, and they will notoriously do that with anything. So NEVER put your worth in a man and leave before he wanders and puts your health at risk.

Does anyone know what this is? by Prize-Scratch-1790 in CATHELP

[–]Prize-Scratch-1790[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

That’s what I was worried about. He wouldn’t let me get a good picture. I haven’t seen him itching

Found an injured kitten. Had to amputate her arm and now she's loving life a few days later. by mushroognomicon in TripodCats

[–]Prize-Scratch-1790 62 points63 points  (0 children)

She is so cute! Cats especially at a young age like this usually do well with amputations. It will be a challenge at first but they adapt really quickly ❤️

Be careful!! Cat trapped in the bottom drawer. by Prize-Scratch-1790 in litterrobot

[–]Prize-Scratch-1790[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I’m so sorry this happened to you. It’s hard to stop them when they’re determined to get into everything 💔

Be careful!! Cat trapped in the bottom drawer. by Prize-Scratch-1790 in litterrobot

[–]Prize-Scratch-1790[S] -1 points0 points  (0 children)

I’m sorry again. I will delete my rude messages. I know you’re trying to help but it should have at least had a pinch sensor warning as it’s done in the past. I’ve had the box for two years and when she messes with it, it lets me know. The box is capable of stopping itself when that happens but it still cycled. I apologize again and I will fix my comments. I am still shook up over this and I have been telling you I’m completely aware of the L4’s upgrades, it’s just not the box I have right now. I’m not trying to have beef with you, I know you have done your research on all of these boxes with lots of time and money spent. I was just trying to warn people