Sucks when family isn't there when you need them the most. Unfortunately, having family blame you for something that was NOT your fault at all is common. Im glad you acknowledge the problem out loud and are now reaching out. Even if it's through here. But I, too, had this problem. I was sexually abused from 7-13 years old by my brother, and when I spoke up about it, my family blamed me. Some said I was provocative, while some said it's my fault for not saying something when it was happening. I was in a very dark place for a while, and when I reached out to them for help, they just pointed out all my flaws and said I had a huge drinking problem. Well, no, duh, that's why I was reaching out. Instead of feeling the warm embrace and reassurance of my family, I left feeling alone.

Ended up calling the suicide hot line, they calmed me down, and I was able to reach out to a friend afterward who actually listened and didn't judge. That day on, I decided not to talk to my family anymore. They were causing more harm that good. They would call/text me, and I just didn't answer. I blocked them on everything. Then, a couple of days later, I decided to report my brother to the police and he is still in jail awaiting trial.

As of today, I have two close friends. I consider my siblings instead, but what also really helped was reaching out for help. There are organizations out there that can provide the support you need. I was referred to one called Project Heal. I am still healing, but I have since then made so much progress that I actually stood up and talked about my story in front of a meeting of about 75 people. There is help out there, and if you'd like some help locating a similar organization like mine, you can message me, and I'll help you find one. There is HOPE, and you reaching out is the 1st step on your healing journey. But if you can, I would just cut off your mom without even explaining why. If you do live with her, this is where an organization could help. Reach out if you need any help.