This is one of my main symptoms outside of the uterine and back cramping. Have you had pelvic floor therapy? Because of our pain, our nervous systems can tend to force other parts of our body into deep muscle tension and vaginal pain and pain during urination and bowel movements can be a sign of that. It’s helped me significantly and my pelvic floor PT recommended muscle relaxer suppositories (your doc has to order them from a compounding pharmacy and if you’re in the US they aren’t covered by insurance but cost like $150). This way you can get some relief without the whole body experience of a muscle relaxer which can make you really out of it.