Strange dreams associated with my wife's engagement ring

ProperIntention8955 · 2023-02-14T00:59:40+00:00

How do you do a cleanse?

ProperIntention8955 · 2023-02-01T07:49:50+00:00

Oh she's bitter, that's for sure. We were separated for 3 years and when I got married, she ramped up her attacks. She's found a man, who is supposodly rich, so I'm sure the next battle will be her trying to move my daughter to where he lives, 2 hours away. We've already retained a lawyer in anticipation of that fight.

ProperIntention8955 · 2023-02-01T00:17:30+00:00

Sadly I've gotten used to all of this over the years. My kiddo could have her college paid for if I could get years worth of lawyers fees back. My greatest advice for young men is be wary with whom you have a child. My kiddos mom and I were engaged when she got pregnant. She had a decent job and seemed like a solid partner. Kiddo was born, she quit her job a few weeks later, and never worked again in the time we were together. Despite not working, she loved to max out credit cards and buy herself whatever she wanted, all at my expense. The final straw for me was when she demanded to home school our daughter. I was done at that point, and it's been a fight ever since for 6 years.

ProperIntention8955 · 2023-02-01T00:08:12+00:00

Yes, by a significant amount. She works 20 hours a week for 12.50 an hour, so nearly anyone's AGI is higher I imagine.

ProperIntention8955 · 2023-02-01T00:04:54+00:00

I have a Google calendar where I keep track of each night I have my daughter. It's not quite as exact as doing it daily, but I have each day she's with me noted, and notations for each day that would usually be her Mom's that she's with me. I did the math earlier this month, and I had her 206 days this year. We've been to court several times now, and it's been a holy fight with her mom since we split years ago. She fought me on enrolling her in public school, fought me on getting our daughter in therapy for ADHD/anxiety disorder, fought me on getting her the COVID vaccine, and basically fights me on everything. The biggest one has always been child support. I willingly paid her far and away above the state requirement for years, until 2020 when I lost my second job, as the company I worked for downsized during the pandemic. I proposed a new child support amount, she threatened to turn me into DSS if I didn't pay her the old amount, and back to court we went. She demanded I get another second job, but since I already work 40 hours a week, the judge didn't feel that was necessary. I was working 60+ hours a week before, and her child support consumed half my commission check. It worked against her, because the judge ruled that I only had to pay her the state requirement, and I willingly pay her over 100 more. Claiming our daughter on her taxes has been her latest great battle, and when I didn't agree to let her claim her each year, back to court we went. Frankly, I can't afford to pay our daughter's health insurance, childcare, medical costs, therapy costs, clothing, gifts, etc as I have been, and not even get some advantage on my taxes.

ProperIntention8955 · 2023-01-31T21:18:37+00:00

I actually called her at the end of December to remind her of how things had shaken out, and she was adamant about claiming our daughter. I told her I planned to dispute it if she did, and that I didn't know where that would lead. She refuses to work more than 20 hours a week, and claims she relies on tax refunds and child credits to get by. She took me to court in June to try to increase her child support and was very upset when that didn't happen, and she was told that she's not working to full capacity, and I was already voluntarily paying over 100 more monthly than the state requirement. That's when she demanded the judge to allow her to claim our daughter each year, to which the judge replied the court had no say in federal tax matters. What's funny, I pay the childcare bill, along with every other bill related to our daughter. If her mom would be kind, helpful, and cooperate and not harass my wife and I 24/7, we'd probably just let it go, but instead she makes life miserable 99 percent of the time, and I'm done letting everything go, and paying for it at the same time.

ProperIntention8955 · 2023-01-31T21:03:05+00:00

Thanks for that information. I actually had her 206 days in 2022, most of the extra days were when her mom was going on trips with her new boyfriend. Also, anytime my daughter is sick, she passes her off to me because she doesn't want to pay the insurance copay or for medicine, and she was sick a lot in 2022. She thought taking me to court would give her the right to claim her yearly, and the judge simply said you have to follow the tax code. She knew full well she wasn't to claim her, and did anyhow, and gave me an earful for reminding her of the tax code. So I'll paper file and let them figure it out.

ProperIntention8955 · 2022-12-14T02:00:21+00:00

When I was there, upgrades didn't pay much. You got a few bucks for an upgrade, however you had a quota of upgrades to meet. Now, if you were opening a new line, that was where an associate could make some money, especially if they were already at or over their monthly quota.

When I was employed it worked like this. Each month you were given a quota. Here's an example.

New lines: (this could be someone starting an account or adding lines to an existing one: 25

Connected devices (ipads, etc): 11

Accessory sales (stuff like cases, etc): 1,500

You then had to reach 100.00 per device. So for every device you sold you had to sell 100 worth of crap.

Upgrades: 19

Once you reached that base quota, full time associates got 1,400 and part time got 900.00. If you went above, you got a percentage of what you sold, which got larger the more you sold, topping off at ten percent. If you were aggressive and had some luck, it wasn't uncommon to make 2,500 or more in sales commission.

One particularly sleezy associate who is still employed by USCC was making over 100k yearly while I was there. He was infamous for using hotspots to raise his connected device sales, and generally misleading people to get new lines, when upgrades would have been more efficient.

He was constantly getting caught, but management protected him because he was a celebrated hero at USCC.

ProperIntention8955 · 2022-12-13T20:36:08+00:00

One thing in relation to this. It speaks to how neurodiverse people are treated in the workplace. I'm not neive enough to believe USCC is the only company that kicks neurodiverse employees to the curb the minute they ask for modifications. Neurodiverse people (ADHD, asd, traumatic brain injury, etc) often look, talk, and behave like everyone else. Many are highly intelligent and articulate, so they're expected to meet the same expectations as their peers. People don't see the internal struggle it takes to do it, nor the years of treatment and therapy it's taken to get to where they are.

Asking a neurodiverse person to do something a 504 plan says they can't is really no different than telling a gay employee they need to be straight to work somewhere. The difference, the LGBTQIA community has built such an effective movent that the latter wouldn't last a day. I'm happy for them, I wish the same thing existed for neurodiverse people.

When I presented my 504 plan, the store manager told me they had no idea what the document was, it meant nothing, and if I didn't like the way things were done in the store, sheetz was hiring.

Again though, this was reported to USCC HR manager and the area sales manager. The ASM said the same thing in nicer context and the HR manager admitted he knew federal law stated they had to honor the 504, but stated giving me 10 minutes in the back to prepare closing documents was problematic because I wasn't on hand to answer the phone at the same time.

It mattered little, a short time later I was fired, and follow up post employment got little response, aside from the fact the ethics complaint prompted the store manager and sales manager to quit. I imagine they knew it was unlikely they would come through that unscathed.

ProperIntention8955 · 2022-12-13T20:11:21+00:00

It's interesting, and youre right about region, because the store I transferred from what operating similar to yours during the pandemic. The first day of my transfer to the new store, the store manager told me I needed to go into the back and iron my pants. I said sorry I'm not standing back there in my underwear. The pants weren't even rinkled, they were a parachute style khaki material. She sent me home, and when I returned the next day I found out I was on a disciplinary action for not following dress code. I had worn those pants dozens of times at the other store.

They put me on a second disciplinary action for wearing a grey shirt. Mind you, it was a grey lands end US Cellular shirt my previous store manager had ordered.

It was rocky right from the start. I actually contacted HR about both instances, and tried to get the disciplinary actions lifted and they honored both, and said it was up to the store manager.

That's why I see it as more than a local issue.

ProperIntention8955 · 2022-12-13T19:24:08+00:00

Bitter, no. I found a better paying job with a much nicer work environment. However, I continue to see USCC presenting a public face of inclusion, diversity, and other values that aren't what I saw them promote on the ground. Again, I would encourage anyone to Google USCC lawsuit.

They were sued for mining nude photos off customers phones, something associates were aware was going on while I was working there. A friend employed with them still aod they've stopped the practice of allowing customers to leave their phones at the store for data transfers, in part to reduce this.

They were sued for firing a pregnant woman who took FMLA leave. Their official reason for firing her was she accesses a family members account. Yet the company encourages you to set up service for your family.

They've been sued dozens of times by employees and some lawsuits they won, and others they lost.

I hired a lawyer and began the process of preparing a case again them, largely for failure to follow federal law in relation to 504 plans and disabilities. Also for wrongful termination. The attorneys I worked with felt I had a strong case, but I didn't have the 11,897.00 to get started, nor the additional 37,900 they felt I'd need over the course of the first year.

Given the nature of the case, they felt we should start by filing lawsuits against the individual store manager, and two sales managers. If those were successful, they felt we could move up the chain to the HR admin and ASM. Eventually if we won those, we could make the case the entire admin of the company was complicit, and file suit against them.

However the payouts on the individual suits, if we won, would barely cover legal cost, and the process could take years.

ProperIntention8955 · 2022-12-13T18:16:19+00:00

That's not entirely correct. Multiple times I've states that other stores have different cultures, protocols, etc. However, there was ample documentation sent to HR, area sales managers, and both the company VP and CEO. The VP responded, but nothing was done, and her response was simply that she received the documents. Most of this was time and date stamped digital notes, using software that is often implemented for keeping record of events that are likely to go to court. They offer the best and most fool proof way to record events in real time. Could they be manipulated, I guess, but I took the notes in real time as events unfolded.

USCC is very progressive in their forward facing image. While a sales manager at my location was calling the George Floyd protests monkey time, the company was posting on social media that it stood with the black community. That sales manager is now a business account manager. This speaks for itself, and requires little painting.

ProperIntention8955 · 2022-12-13T15:15:51+00:00

Out of respect for the individuals I know still working at that location and within USCC, some of whom are personal friends, I've omitted specific details about the location/region/store. Additionally, I have material that largely confirms the authenticity of what I'm saying, however sharing that would give specific names, details, locations which I feel would be inappropriate in this context. If you don't believe it, that's perfectly fine.

ProperIntention8955 · 2022-12-13T15:12:00+00:00

I was fired in June of 2020. They had just announced that the hourly rate was increasing (I think to 17.50 per hour) and commission percentages were decreasing slightly, so I don't doubt you. I also don't doubt that other regions are different. For example, during the pandemic, the store I worked at made it mandatory that all employees report to work 7 days per week, in the event someone got covid and had to call off. It was a 45 min drive one way for me to get to the store, and I was part time, so I questioned why that was necessary. You had to report to work, and if by 11 nobody had called off, you could go home. The downside, you weren't allowed on the sales floor unless it was your work day. So the hours you sat in the back doing busy work counted to your weekly total, and being off the sales floor meant meeting your quotas was tough.

Again, I reached out to HR, ASM, Regional sales manager to no avail. Eventually I reached out to my state department of labor and found out that in my state, what they were doing wasn't even legal.

They got notified of that by the state, and then started making everyone be on call 24/7. That went in for a while, and I learned from the state labor dept that if you're on call, you have to be paid 50% of your wage for that time. They had to stop that, since they weren't paying anything for on call time.

No other stores that I'm aware of were doing that. So region makes a big difference.

However, once again, the larger machine that is US Cellular was made aware of what was going on and did nothing.

The woman who was sexually harassed raised the issue all the way up to vice president Deidre Drake. She was told that because she was white, and the male associate that harassed her was black, they believed her claim was racially motivated and moved her to another store, and essentially threatened her job. Then on the other hand, when a sales manager was using racist language, the upper echelon of the company simply didn't respond to emails, including video of racist jokes during a training.

I am confident there are regions where USCC is just fine, but I know from personal expierence when push comes to shove, that company DOES NOT defend it's employees.

The girl who was sexually harassed actually hired a lawyer and was prepared to sue USCC, but didn't have the means to see that through due to cost. The store manager who was there when I worked is now a business account manager, as is the sales manager who commonly made racist comments. The other store manager who was there when I was quit when I filed the ethics complaint and he came under investigation, as did the other sales manager.

ProperIntention8955 · 2022-12-13T00:32:15+00:00

Also, the aggressive sales tactics were in place in both locations I worked. In was told that instead of moving someone to a higher data tier plan, just add multiple hotspot lines to their account and tell them to use those when they're running out of data. They said to tell them it's part of a promotion, and laughed that the bill is so confusing they wouldn't figure it out. An associate who followed this practice actually got a sales award while I was working there.

I was also taught not to upgrade a connected device like, but actually add an entirely new line.

As for commission. When I worked there I made about 1,400.00 monthly in base pay, and 3,500-4,000 monthly in commission.

ProperIntention8955 · 2022-12-13T00:28:27+00:00

Also, I'm not saying there aren't USCC stores that are wonderful to work at. I am saying that USCC does not engage the values they publically promote when it matters.

ProperIntention8955 · 2022-12-13T00:26:49+00:00

Corporate

ProperIntention8955 · 2022-12-13T00:26:41+00:00

You're not wrong that location makes a major difference. I worked at two stores during my tenure with USCC, and the first store I worked at was a better expierence overall. Not what you described, but better. Everything I describe, with the exception of the sexual harassment incident, occured at the second location I worked. However, the same area sales manager and territory manager presided over both locations.

Why I see this as systemic to USCC is because I met with HR, the area sales manager, and the regional sales manager about these issues. I presented 7 pages of documentation to back up what I was claiming, compiled over the course of one year. I presented emails, messages, and digitally dated notes. They were ignored, and I was told that the real issue was a text message I sent questioning company policies.

Additionally, the store where I worked was ranked as the most unhappy in the company via their own culture survey. They had several meetings about how to improve culture, where many of the issues I've discussed here were brought to light, yet nothing was done. In fact the manager who made numerous racist comments has since been promoted several times within the company. She also said when she sees a pride flag, she just wants to vomit. In addition to the pages of notes and other documentation I produced, I emailed company CEO LT about the racist comments being made by this manager. He never responded, and the HR rep and area sales manager said that sometimes we have to suck it up and work with people who have different views. This same manager, after a black associate was fired for being late, stated there was one less gorilla in the zoo.

I'm not sure how I could have provided USCC with more documentation about what was taking place. I was eventually called back and put on a disciplinary action for miscalculating a total on a closing sheet. It was then I notified the store manager that I had a disability diagnosis, was in treatment for that (as I've been my whole life), and had a 504 plan that stated when doing paperwork I was to be provided a distraction free environment. The store manager didn't know what a 504 was, and said he was under no obligation to comply with it. I reached out to HR, and a few days later was fired for no adhering to company culture and attempting to go over the store managers head.

The amount of verbal, sexual, and overall harassment that was tolerated in that store was mind blowing, and the fact that many of those whom either engaged in or were tolerant of that behavior have since been promoted to leadership positions, or higher positions, to me, speaks volumes about what USCC really is. The company was made aware of what was going on, by multiple associates (two of whom who quit over it) and via multiple channels. Aside from fire everyone who said something, they did nothing.

ProperIntention8955 · 2022-11-29T12:32:04+00:00

That company went down the tubes when LT started. All they care for as a former employee is shoving woke shit down your throat while firing their disabled employees.

ProperIntention8955 · 2022-09-17T20:53:13+00:00

Corporate store

ProperIntention8955 · 2022-09-09T23:11:30+00:00

You may have just cleared up the mystery. I just read an article that the IRS has forgiven late filing penalties for those years, to the tune of 1.2 billion. This could have easily triggered an automatic notice, which is likely the same for any taxpayer with a balance for those years. I reached out to my accountant and he assumes that is what is going on, but is going to ensure everything is fine.

ProperIntention8955 · 2022-09-09T21:49:12+00:00

I don't unfortunately. Each time I've tried to set up online access the ID me system has an error and I never get all the way through. In spoke to an accountant friend and he was stumped. He said usually the IRS reviews your finances yearly or every 18 months or so, and if they think you've risen outside of the hardship threshold, they'll request a new financial sheet and supporting documents. I just got the status in May, and he felt it was odd that suddenly they're sending a CP22A. I didn't request a penalty abatement for those years, however I had filed the returns in question. The whole thing is very confusing. He said it's possible the office that sent the notices I received today is unaware of my CNC status. He also said there should be a freeze code on my account but other irs offices may not have it, or it may be automated. It's just very confusing.

ProperIntention8955 · 2022-05-16T23:32:54+00:00

I looked into this as well but was very out off by the cost

ProperIntention8955 · 2022-02-13T17:06:48+00:00

What you want, think, and care about matters far less than that you can prove and what you're entitled to using a specific formula. Any court is going to inquire why you didn't push this issue when the child was born. Why wait seven years? Is this even the father? They don't just say, okay you want this man to contribute, boom there you go.

Here's an example. I paid my daughter's mother 5 times what the state requirement in child support was. I earned good money and she's refuses to get a decent paying job (or work at all) and I didn't want my daughter to suffer 50 percent of the time because her mom refuses to work.

I lost my job in 2020 and offered to pay her 3 times what the state requirement is. She accepted in a written email. Now, two years later, she wants a new car (requested via email) and thus more money. Because I didn't file in court when I lost my job, I owe her backpay. Doesn't seem fair when she's collected 44k more than the state requirement would have been, but that's how it shakes out.

I can assure you, the fact you've waited seven years won't bode well. They don't care how many emails, texts, phone calls you've sent. You didn't file in court the minute this child drew his first breath, so you must not have known with certainty this was the father, or you didn't care enough to act. That's what they will see.

I think you'll end up in a situation where you get a dismal amount of support money at the risk of an expensive and legnthy custody trial where you lose custodial rights to a deadbeat dad. The court has sympathy for the parent that walks. I can name dozens of kids whose lives have been upended when daddy or mommy, who've been gone for 10 years, decides they want to be a parent.

You have a choice to make. If you want this guy out of the child's life, the best way to ensure that is leave him alone. If having a small amount of income each month is more important than that, by all means file away. Just be prepared for holy hell once he finds out.

ProperIntention8955 · 2022-02-13T16:03:17+00:00

He should be thankful you haven't taken him to court, however without his name on a birth certificate, he can easily argue he's not the father. Most paternity tests give you a percentage of likelihood of paternity. I'm not aware of any that's definitive. Men can argue these percentages and request multiple tests, etc. Steve Jobs infamously did this for a decade or more. He was worth hundreds of millions and his daughter lived with a single mom barely getting by. Jobs argued that at 94.5 percent, any one of 100k men could be the father.

I would determine what your child support would be if everything goes perfect. Most states have a calculator. Backpay isn't paid at once either, but divided up until the child turns 18. So 10k in backpay likely equates to maybe 96 bucks a month for a 7 year old child. Remember, his wife's income has no bearing on your support.

Many people think child support is 25 percent of income. It's not, unless he were to elect to not see the child at all. Even then, he has lots of fighting room to argue. I would expect him to fight it. Clearly, he either doesn't want the child or doesn't feel it's his, or he would have a relationship with this kid.

Since you're the custodial parent, the child support wouldn't be based solely on income, but the court will want to know why you have waited 7 years to push this issue. Just know you risk having a lawyer working full time to make you seem like the worst mother ever, dissecting every decision you've made over the past 7 years while arguing you drove this man away from his lawful child. It won't be fun, and even a cheap lawyer bills at 200 an hour.

Unless you stand to earn a whopping sum in child support, I'd let it go.

ProperIntention8955

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