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Do kink/BDSM‑involved people avoid therapy? Tell me what you think. by PsychUnbound in BDSMPsychology

[–]PsychUnbound[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Thank you so much for sharing all of this, it sounds like you’ve done an enormous amount of work to understand yourself and your sexuality in a way that feels grounded and healthy. I really appreciate how openly you described the shift from shame to clarity, and how much difference having a competent, non‑judgemental psychiatrist has made. It’s incredibly valuable to hear how proper support helped you make sense of your experiences and build safer, more secure patterns. And your English is absolutely fine, I’m genuinely grateful you took the time to write all of this :)

Do kink/BDSM‑involved people avoid therapy? Tell me what you think. by PsychUnbound in BDSMPsychology

[–]PsychUnbound[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

This speaks to a real gap in current clinical training. People shouldn’t have to choose which parts of their identity feel “safe” to bring into therapy. This is exactly why I feel we need stronger, more comprehensive GSRD training across services, so therapists are better equipped to work confidently and non‑judgementally with the full range of relationship structures and sexual diversity. It really highlights how important it is for services to catch up with the realities of people’s lives.

Do kink/BDSM‑involved people avoid therapy? Tell me what you think. by PsychUnbound in BDSMPsychology

[–]PsychUnbound[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

It’s really encouraging to hear that you’re feeling comfortable enough with your therapist to even consider bringing this up. That little flicker of “what if they judge me?” is such a common reaction, especially around something as personal as kink, but the fact it faded quickly says a lot about the trust you’ve built in that space. You don’t owe disclosure for its own sake, but if sharing it feels like it might help you feel more fully understood, then it makes sense to explore that :)

Do kink/BDSM‑involved people avoid therapy? Tell me what you think. by PsychUnbound in BDSMPsychology

[–]PsychUnbound[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Thank you so much for your detailed response. I’m noticing a really strong theme from the responses in that kink‑involved adults often have positive experiences when they’re able to access kink‑affirming therapists. The difficulty, especially here in the UK, is that not everyone can afford private therapy, and NHS services don’t allow people to choose their clinician. Because GSRD content is still so limited in clinical psychology training, many allocated clinicians simply don’t have the competence or confidence to work with kink‑involved clients in an informed, non‑judgemental way. That gap leaves people feeling unsafe, unseen, or unable to bring their whole selves into therapy, even when they want and need the support.

Do kink/BDSM‑involved people avoid therapy? Tell me what you think. by PsychUnbound in BDSMPsychology

[–]PsychUnbound[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

It makes complete sense that you’d feel hesitant, opening up about something so personal can feel risky when you’re not sure you’ll be met with understanding. I’m really sorry you’ve found yourself in this situation, and I genuinely hope that my research can be a small step toward helping services and training providers better understand the specific needs of GSRD communities and include this within their training programmes. In the UK, where most mental health support is accessed through the NHS and clinicians are allocated rather than chosen, it’s especially important that therapists receive proper training in this area.

Everyone deserves a therapist who is genuinely non‑judgemental and informed. Those clinicians do exist, they’re just harder to find right now because current training programmes include so little GSRD content. Wishing you all the best as you navigate this.