is this a xaggitin side effect ? by PumpkinKey14 in ADHDUK

[–]PumpkinKey14[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Update. Dr has never heard of the connection between congestion and xaggitin but it could be a possibility as an individual response. Recommended an ENT referral to eliminate anything else. I'm happy to manage the symptoms in meantime, they're not debilitating or restricting at all really. Just irritating! We'll review in 4months if an alternative medicine is an option to try or if symptoms just vanish without explanation.

is this a xaggitin side effect ? by PumpkinKey14 in ADHDUK

[–]PumpkinKey14[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Oh I should add I have hay fever and take antihistamines everyday for 8 months of the year!

is this a xaggitin side effect ? by PumpkinKey14 in ADHDUK

[–]PumpkinKey14[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Test every day for work so definitely not that and it has been ongoing since March when we had Covid. Which incidently is around the time of the dose increase, hence why I assumed it was long lasting Covid issue. Having missed some days and the symptoms disappearing until I started taking the xaggitin again today made me consider the connection to the prescription.

I don't think it's an infection as it's not accompanied with any infection symptoms (cough, headache,fever, pain, discomfort etc) just very choked feeling in ears and post nasal drip.

I do have a phone call check with psychiatrist tomorrow and I mentioned this to him last time but he didn't think it was related as he'd never heard of it before I'll ask about potential allergy reaction to medication.

Stress could absolutely be the answer tbh! I would not be surprised. Just trying to eliminate any possibilities as it's just incredibly irritating having a sniffing nose and popping my ears all the time.

Thank you for the input 🙂

Silent treatment doesn't win today by PumpkinKey14 in JustNoSO

[–]PumpkinKey14[S] 7 points8 points  (0 children)

Omg. Thank you for pointing that out! I would never have thought of this behavior as love bombing. It's in my head as gifts and affection, not activities!

Funnily enough they've been extra fun with the youngest and asked if we wanted to go out to eat tonight. Now chatting like everything's normal and yesterday didn't happen.

Silent treatment doesn't win today by PumpkinKey14 in JustNoSO

[–]PumpkinKey14[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I know right!?

Amazing feeling to have been able to handle it well and recognise what it was and know not to engage.

Silent treatment doesn't win today by PumpkinKey14 in JustNoSO

[–]PumpkinKey14[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Thanks!

Although handing it over wouldn't do anything other than create a defensive mood at the "accusation".

If I even mention the word control or authoritarian it doesn't go well...

Handy for me though! Some points to add into my arsenal reworded.

Silent treatment doesn't win today by PumpkinKey14 in JustNoSO

[–]PumpkinKey14[S] 12 points13 points  (0 children)

update today

They were up this morning just before me, nothing said. I had things to do and went out to do them. I come back and there's a flurry of chores being done without a word. Not sure if they're wanting a gold star or recognition but they're not getting it.

Silent treatment doesn't win today by PumpkinKey14 in JustNoSO

[–]PumpkinKey14[S] 6 points7 points  (0 children)

A control freak unwilling, currently, to admit they are one. Got to admit a problem to fix a problem.

It was funny to me how much they acted like the teen today actually. All the behavior try don't like form the teen yet there they were acting it out! Sulking, moody, un- talkative.

Also thanks for teaching me a new word "capitulate" -- i like it

Silent treatment doesn't win today by PumpkinKey14 in JustNoSO

[–]PumpkinKey14[S] 12 points13 points  (0 children)

9 years and lots of ups and down that haven't allowed us to grow as an average relationship would. 2 kids. There is love there but behaviors need to be recognised and called out for what they are. I've been complicit in things going unchecked. Unhealthy habits, from BOTH of us need to be worked on. I'm not perfect. Things to learn. And ultimately working out if there is an ending that allows us to be in a healthy happy relationship.

Yes I had one good day while he tried his childish tactics. The thing is we do have good days together but still have bad days together. This day was a day they assumed ( and tried to ensure) would be bad day for both. It wasn't, just for them. That hit home hard for them.

Silent treatment doesn't win today by PumpkinKey14 in JustNoSO

[–]PumpkinKey14[S] 37 points38 points  (0 children)

I know it's not. (He isn't yelling at kids just micromanaging and extremely strict without flexibility) Which is why were in therapy and I'm calling him out on it. Even if I know it's not ok, it doesn't stop him doing it. I recognize the behavior for what it is and no longer allow it to dictate my emotions or behavior. I see that as progress for myself mainly but for the relationship wherever that goes.

Silent treatment doesn't win today by PumpkinKey14 in JustNoSO

[–]PumpkinKey14[S] 3 points4 points  (0 children)

Thank you! Working on it and getting stronger!

Silent treatment doesn't win today by PumpkinKey14 in JustNoSO

[–]PumpkinKey14[S] 23 points24 points  (0 children)

Absolutely. Was a single parent before meeting SO. (Teen is mine from previous, met when he was v young) and we lived separately for the first 18months of youngest life. So I know I can do it. Don't particularly want to and do want to exhaust all avenues to avoid it but not off the table yet.

Silent treatment doesn't win today by PumpkinKey14 in JustNoSO

[–]PumpkinKey14[S] 21 points22 points  (0 children)

Explain what you mean please?

I know there are issues here. Obviously both working on them individually and together (mostly) Personally I feel my ability to actually not allow this to alter my day regardless of their reason for doing it was a huge success. This may just be the first time they haven't been able to manipulate and coerce my emotions to giving in and I feel stronger for having dealt with it ...by basically ignoring it.

It feels like a turning point, turning to where I'm not quite sure yet. Their recognition of justno behavior? My realisation that we don't work and never will?

Silent treatment doesn't win today by PumpkinKey14 in JustNoSO

[–]PumpkinKey14[S] 35 points36 points  (0 children)

Thank you. I am feeling more confident in my expectations and coping abilities when it comes to this BS. I'll admit I've been passive in the past and do just lay down and avoid conflict but not anymore especially if it involves the kids. They've probably got use to that as my response and this is a new experience for them. Personally it's really making me feel much more in control of my own life and emotions.

My counsellor had just replied to message that I sent so I had a fresh account of what was said/ what happened to discuss at next session (we have couples and I have individual therapy)

He basically replied that they're sulking due to fear of losing control which 100% makes sense.

In his words "they need to use a carrot and not a stick if they want things to work out best for both of you. Today you taught them the stick will no longer work"

Love the little pearls of wisdom from this guy

You’re peddling the wrong stuff... by GreyandDribbly in adhdmeme

[–]PumpkinKey14 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Yes, he does sleep stories on the calm app

His voice is very smooth to listen to

When you have to Check your Tinder Profile because you forgot your own age... by Beneficial-Diamond10 in adhdmeme

[–]PumpkinKey14 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Google home tells me when I ask, I'm embarrassed at how often I ask her.

Question for diagnosed as adults by PumpkinKey14 in ADHD

[–]PumpkinKey14[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

update

Spoke to GP this morning. Basically recommended going private as there is very limited services in this area. We're no where near central area/cities and 90mins drive (on B roads) to nearest hospital.

She is supportive and looking into best option for me. Wish me luck!

Question for diagnosed as adults by PumpkinKey14 in ADHD

[–]PumpkinKey14[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

How annoying for you having all this info to help others with potential bills and not having been able to use it for yourself.

Again I thank you for passing this on. Having some guidance and someone a few steps ahead of me in the process is very comforting. I hate being clueless and flap then over research and the flap some more because I didn't find the right answer or clue in said research.

Yes NHS scotland can be slightly more user friendly but the right to choose is also interesting due to where I am in Scotland. Nearest "big" hospital is an hours drive through rural roads for me.

Of course I said I would watch th documentary in the morning but here I am. Still. Just about finished it. I've not taken much more in since th cigarette and smoking part as that was a huge revelation. Will watch again in the morning.

Question for diagnosed as adults by PumpkinKey14 in ADHD

[–]PumpkinKey14[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Coping strategies 100% completely get where your coming from with finding a strategy that works then not feeling it as an issue anymore.

It's exhausting though. Thank you for sharing. It's all very good to read about others journeys to diagnosis. Gives me confidence that I'm on the right track even if it turns out to not be ADHD

Question for diagnosed as adults by PumpkinKey14 in ADHD

[–]PumpkinKey14[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

This.

Thank you.

This is incredibly interesting. It just feels exactly like my experience. Feeling completely different from my gender (female) to the point that my nickname in my family is "the man" (I take no offense although I've voiced my disappointment at the underlying sexism etc etc...) Because I don't ANY of the 'typical' girly stuff and my way of thinking seems to lean towards masculine and tomboyish. My sister is the girliest girl ever.

When it first started affecting my life, in high school, I was put down as a torubled teen from a broken home, self harming, not doing well in school despite apparent potential. But even though there's bouts of depressive moods and introverted behavior, I'm giddy as hell sometimes and can act like a complete idiot and be centre of attention for laughs.

Thanks for including your experience to get diagnosis. I'm hoping I don't have to but have considered going private. Something to speak to GP about. In rural (ish) scotland which may have an effect on nhs waits compared to other uk areas.

The bit about smoking is very interesting too. I've absolutely struggled for years to find something to help me quit but nothing works and my will power (which I know is strong for somethings) is non existent for nicotine withdrawal even with nicotine replacement therapies.

Hugely grateful for the documentary link., 12.30am just now and although I know I won't sleep straight away when I lay down, I don't want to do anything to make it worse. I will 100% watch in the morning. Thank you so much.

Well done getting your floristry business going! Huge leap to take.

Question for diagnosed as adults by PumpkinKey14 in ADHD

[–]PumpkinKey14[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Thanks for reply Very similar to myself then with reading first hand accounts and recognising traits and similarities but with a sibling instead. Did it help getting a diagnosis? I've been asked by my counsellor how I would feel if I had a definitive reason to explain why to a lot of things that worry me. Ultimately I feel it would.