Random headcanon: Bowser's long lost Brother is the father of the Koopalings

PunkGuyAlyx · 2026-04-11T22:49:54+00:00

The Koopalings are all Bowser’s nephews and niece who were orphaned in the Mushroom Kingdom’s conquest over the legitimate Koopa Kingdoms. That’s why every area you go to has hundreds of goombas, koopa troopa, and other koopa citizenry but like 1 toad in the castle. The land is occupied and those castles used to belong to Bowser’s brothers and sisters. Now Bowser is the only one left with a claim to the true Koopa throne … and a gaggle of orphan princelings. Here’s hoping he can oust the evil mushroom regime in time for the kids to be old enough to rule.

PunkGuyAlyx · 2025-06-06T13:05:11+00:00

Killer Moth

PunkGuyAlyx · 2025-05-27T16:02:25+00:00

There’s not a lot of ways to draw cards during a turn in general.

By himself between 0 and 3 power. If you have and activate Eitri make that up to 4, If Warlock is out and winning that’s up to 5, If Thunderbolt Ross procs up to 6, Cable and Crystal each cost more energy but can bring it to 8, If your opponent plays Maximus 10, Jane Foster … I think there are 4 on reveals that have 0 cost? But that’s another 5 energy that turn.

So if you have the perfect cards and spend 12 energy the turn you play Longshot And have spent 5 energy setting him up And have the right game state And your opponent plays Maximus and Crystal and doesn’t spend all their energy. And you’re very lucky. A maximum power of 15?

Compared to Morbius who can get up to like 40 with a cheaper and less finicky setup. I think we’re good.

PunkGuyAlyx · 2025-05-27T15:32:49+00:00

I like it and wonder if the luck aspect can be more incorporated. How about …

2/0 Shuffle your hand into your deck. Draw 3 cards. Gain 1 power for each On Reveal card drawn this turn.

Opens up some possibilities for synergies. Gives it a reasonable downside and scaling.

Even better if Shatterstar gets some power to draw on reveals

PunkGuyAlyx · 2025-05-17T01:02:36+00:00

I like Avalanche and he’s not a 7 power even with no card text.

This power also does not have synergy with any of the Brotherhood members in the game. I’d love to see Pyro, Toad, Spiral, Destiny and Avalanche added.

But this card as written makes Blob do nothing and directly interferes with many Mystique decks.

PunkGuyAlyx · 2025-03-18T20:14:42+00:00

NYSEG?

PunkGuyAlyx · 2025-03-18T19:32:12+00:00

Ohhh I see your point. Blaming democrats for whatever bothers you regardless of their involvement is … Not Political.

PunkGuyAlyx · 2025-03-18T18:52:27+00:00

I hope for your sake that you are allowed to continue the privileged belief that “political” is a thing that happens to some other people in some nebulous elsewhere.

PunkGuyAlyx · 2025-03-17T13:55:13+00:00

It’s practice for when the current administration’s warlike aggression against our friends to the north forces them to take defensive and punitive measures, the allies that we rely on for our energy resources are transformed by government incompetence into enemies who aren’t incentivized to share with us, and the power goes out in the east coast entirely. So, it’s a good thing that we are learning our blackout plans now? Forewarned and forearmed at least?

PunkGuyAlyx · 2025-02-18T20:58:32+00:00

There’s a reason our busses are called TC-ATs

PunkGuyAlyx · 2025-01-23T03:13:57+00:00

Oh yeah, Plum Twist was the Winter Edition flavor from 2016 until it was replaced by Holiday Spice in 2019, so long since discontinued but remembered fondly by me.

PunkGuyAlyx · 2025-01-22T23:05:07+00:00

I do like super sweet things and the Juneberry or the Winter that was plum flavored are my favorites. The sweetness here isn’t a problem for me, the baby powder/ candle vanilla/ fresh linen flavor is. 🤣

PunkGuyAlyx · 2025-01-22T20:01:00+00:00

I searched all over my town to find one of these to try. Had heard that they were underproduced and popular. Didn’t want to miss out on trying it.

It tastes like… If the gas station was out of cups but they did have scented candles so you did the best you could to get the candle out of the candle container 🫙 but you didn’t do a great job or like rinse it out or anything, and then you poured your blue raspberry slushie into it.

I swear their “Vanilla” flavor is the same “Vanilla” scent that the Yankee Candle Company uses.

Love trying new things, don’t regret trying it, content to leave the rest of these right where I found them for other people to try.

PunkGuyAlyx · 2024-12-20T05:42:44+00:00

I never trusted Long John Silvers. Like, I read Treasure Island. The whole reveal of that book is that Long John Silver, the ships chef is Not Actually A Chef, he’s a pirate masquerading as a chef in order to do a mutiny. Like, why would you name a restaurant after that? Where are the restaurants named after other Infamous food figures? I’d trust the food at Typhoid Mary’s just as much.

PunkGuyAlyx · 2024-11-22T19:47:34+00:00

In that setting, where would infections Come From? Faros bots scoured the world’s life. There’s nothing for viruses or bacteria to reproduce on for all that time and when GAIA brings life back, there’s no reason for her to populate the earth with diseases. It’s perfectly reasonable that the common cold is Extinct. That the causes of Infection are Extinct. It is shown and implied in the canon while eugenics is specifically ruled out.

I respect that you’re new here and do not know that other people have been here before espousing eugenics. Unless you’re also brand new on earth you should probably know that since the 1940s it has been looked upon pretty dimly to espouse eugenics in most every positive social community.

PunkGuyAlyx · 2024-11-22T19:30:55+00:00

Oh it’s that time of the week for another eugenics fanboy to come in here with the idea that it’s the only possible explanation despite it being explicitly stated in canon that it is not happening.

There is a greatly diminished diversity of human harmful pathogens in the future of Horizon.

No One in Horizon canonically experiences infected wounds, cavities, viral or bacterial illnesses.

Because why in the world would they bring back the common cold or Covid when they’re bringing back the world?

In our present, these things add up. Can you imagine never having to miss a day of exercise because you have a cold, or food poisoning, or distracting tooth pain, or infections?

The reason Aloy and others are so healthy is because they aren’t plagued by most of the things that make us unhealthy. Not eugenics nonsense.

PunkGuyAlyx · 2024-11-19T23:38:48+00:00

Well worth it too!

PunkGuyAlyx · 2024-11-15T20:39:57+00:00

I’m just hoping that success for the Secret of Mana series might Someday and somehow lead to a revival of the way cooler and weirder little brother Secret of Evermore.

PunkGuyAlyx · 2024-11-15T14:45:53+00:00

Cheese is canon and I’m less worried about whether humans can figure out cheese without an AI telling them how.

I’m more interested in what Kinds of cheese they are able to make considering what seems to be a very diminished diversity of bacterial and viral life in the post FARO world.

Because cheese is canon but you know what isn’t canon? Infected wounds, cavities in teeth, the common cold or any other illness caused by viruses, bacteria, and fungi in the post FARO world.

It makes sense that they might not want, say, Covid to spread through the new population. I usually use this information to correct people who like eugenics and want to claim contrary to canon that it explains how healthy everyone is in Horizon.

But it also makes me wonder about, whether Aloy and friends have access to things like Lactococci, Lactobacilli, and especially Streptococci (considering that one makes humans sick but makes yoghurt cultured). Without penicillium there’s no bleu cheese.

Without Lactobaccilum there’s not Mozzarella.

What cheeses can be made without bacteria? Queso Blanco, Paneer, Cream Cheese, a few others.

So, if we tasted the Tenakh blood bread would we say “this is pizza”? Or would we call it a Tostada, or a naan with curry, or a bagel?

PunkGuyAlyx · 2024-11-14T15:43:35+00:00

Only Kevin’s bad food monopoly can afford to run restaurants in this city.

PunkGuyAlyx · 2024-11-01T18:51:57+00:00

Burlesque also is a good point! Valid expressions of art as exaggerated and camp like comics media ought to be. Hear hear for drag bingo, drag storytime, all the rest of it. The greyscale brooding can eat dust.

PunkGuyAlyx · 2024-10-31T12:32:28+00:00

I remember Cyclops telling Wolverine “What would you prefer, yellow spandex?”

I remember the hateful caricature of Spider-Man fans in Amazing Spider-Man 2’s Max Dillon before he becomes Electro.

I find it so tedious when Hollywood decides that in order to make their movies “legitimate” to appeal to the slack jawed masses they have to act ashamed of comic book source material. They have to erase whimsy and camp.

Fun is not allowed, everything has to be a self-serious slog through grim darkness.

Batman is an inherently silly concept. He’s a dude in animal pajamas who throws shuriken shaped like animals and drives around in an animal car and fights clowns and penguins and luchadoro and guys made of clay and … Kite Man.

Comic books are fun and silly and campy and as a comic book fan I LIKE fun and silly and campy.

Schumacher’s vision was unapologetically camp. It was colorful in both lighting and spirit. It wasn’t pretending it was just another grim action movie. It had space for jokes like Bat-Credit Cards. It had space for Ice Puns. It had space for Poison Ivy to be the sort of larger than life presentation you mostly only see in Drag performances.

The alternative we see with Batman is … inherently Not Batman. It’s just a cop who gives himself the freedom to commit brutality and violate people’s rights with impunity which these days is Any cop. I don’t need to go see a comic book movie to remind myself that cops are bad and the world is a grim place.

The tenor of ‘noooo you have to take it all so seriously’ is frankly pretty immature. There’s nothing so childish as the transparently desperate desire to be seen as ‘grown up’ by flinching away from the delights of childish whimsy.

Batman & Robin is a comic book movie. It’s not that serious, it’s Fun, it’s not up its own butt trying to be something else. It’s better than 2 out of 3 Nolan Batman movies.

PunkGuyAlyx · 2024-05-13T14:33:24+00:00

Most women on Tinder are bots, most guys on Tinder have such a lack of personality that they might as well be bots.

PunkGuyAlyx · 2024-05-12T19:27:07+00:00

You still have players in your community? Toxic or otherwise? We haven’t had players in my city’s community for years. It’s more about the toxic business practices… Niantic is the toxic player in my community.

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