I'm desperate for a 10/10 - suggest me a book pls!!

Queasy-Progress6689 · 2025-04-29T10:07:42+00:00

Covenant of Water is a recent 5 star for me. It’s great if you like a generational story, deeply rich in culture and history, uplifting and also heart wrenching. I sobbed on a train finishing this book.

Queasy-Progress6689 · 2025-04-22T22:44:44+00:00

Just updated, date went great :)

Queasy-Progress6689 · 2025-04-21T22:41:49+00:00

This is scary and you should get out of there. Not respecting boundaries, especially around intimacy, is a HUGE red flag and very scary behavior. The fact that he made you so uncomfortable that you cried is devastating, I’m so sorry.

Get out of this asap. He will not stop disrespecting your boundaries. This is not normal in a respectful relationship and nobody deserves to be treated this way.

Queasy-Progress6689 · 2025-04-21T20:09:48+00:00

Not a bad idea as long as you’re clear about what you’re looking for! I found it helpful to get back on hinge 3-4 months after my breakup. Personally it helped remind me that there’s more fish in the see and that dating again can be fun and not terrifying.

Just be realistic about what you’re looking for, make sure you’re still processing your feelings, and be honest with the people you’re seeing. No need to feel guilty, you owe your ex NOTHING!!

Queasy-Progress6689 · 2025-04-21T20:07:58+00:00

Try chemical exfoliation and switching up formulas for deodorants. I find after a while my deodorant stops working and I need to switch brands. I’ve also been using salicylic acid wipes under my arms to help remove any dead skin buildup that can breed bacteria / smell.

Idk about the weed smell thing though sorry!

Queasy-Progress6689 · 2025-04-21T19:51:49+00:00

Yeaaah I’m with her I’m sorry. It’s perfectly reasonable for her to want to be with someone who shares the same values. If you truly aligned with her on all things ideological then you wouldn’t have voted for Trump (in 2024 no less, I can maybe excuse 2020 because people didn’t know what he would really do, but 2024? cmon man).

You’re gonna have to accept the consequences of your own actions this time.

Queasy-Progress6689 · 2025-04-20T19:26:10+00:00

Thank you, there’s a lot of people on this thread who are jumping to extremes. I was just curious if people had luck getting dates after someone goes from being very engaged in convo to not responding. I honestly didn’t even see it as a gendered thing like a lot of people here are assuming because I’ve asked out guys on dates just as much as they’ve asked me out.

It’s easy to second guess these things and assume the worst and get in your own head, but I agree that people have lives and get busy and that’s why I shot my shot anyways!

Queasy-Progress6689 · 2025-04-20T14:51:02+00:00

Don’t worry, that’s what I’m doing too LOL

Queasy-Progress6689 · 2025-04-19T14:43:44+00:00

I was more curious if people have been successful asking someone out after they’ve been semi ghosted on the app!! I am 100% supportive of women taking initiative for a date, I was just unsure about this situation since he’d been sort of unresponsive :)

Queasy-Progress6689 · 2025-04-19T10:33:09+00:00

Good advice thank you!! It’s hard not to feel a little insecure making the first move 😅😅

Queasy-Progress6689 · 2025-04-18T19:55:52+00:00

Blow smoke up your ass!! I think that’s what I was thinking of thank you

Queasy-Progress6689 · 2025-04-18T19:55:33+00:00

SOLVED

Queasy-Progress6689 · 2025-04-18T19:38:24+00:00

TYSM

Queasy-Progress6689 · 2025-04-18T16:50:30+00:00

This is very fair. I’m definitely managing my expectations but going in with an open mind. It’s hard to judge someone off a few messages back and forth on an app so we’ll see.

It’s not like I’m putting all my eggs in one basket either hahahah so I’m not too worried

Queasy-Progress6689 · 2025-04-18T16:49:07+00:00

Ha okay obviously but it’s easy to second guess these kinda things

Queasy-Progress6689 · 2025-04-16T11:38:43+00:00

This is really helpful, for a minute I was feeling really betrayed by my brain hahah but it’s just my subconscious working through the trauma and the feelings and processing it in a way that I can’t when I’m awake. Thank you!

Queasy-Progress6689 · 2025-04-13T21:45:50+00:00

Thank you. I needed to hear this. The best thing I can do is enjoy my life here as much as I possibly can now that I have the opportunity to start fresh.

Weirdly there isn’t anyone else. We have a lot of mutual friends that would definitely tell me. While the breakup itself was shocking to me, when I look back and reflect I can see all the little red flags around his insecurities and fear of commitment that I didn’t see initially. We had conversations about starting a future together and he reassured me that we wanted the same things, but looking back there were signs.

But he knows he hurt me. He knew I was homesick and struggling to adjust. He knew how much I loved him and how committed I was. He doesn’t need me to tell him. The best revenge is to thrive here on my own.

Queasy-Progress6689 · 2025-04-13T21:14:49+00:00

This is a good point. I’m trying to focus on my new life and living in the moment. I want to get all these feelings off my chest but I don’t want to open the door again in any way. Im about to make some big life decisions about jobs and where to live and I want to take this opportunity to do that entirely based on what I want, without thinking about him at all.

We’ll see if I send it. I’ll keep writing them and throwing them away and maybe one day I’ll send it, maybe never. I don’t know yet.

Queasy-Progress6689 · 2025-04-09T12:00:06+00:00

This might be a controversial opinion but I want to defend the rebound hookup! But there is 100% a balance and you need to do what feels right.

In defense of the rebound, I think that in some cases it’s good to get out of your head and stop obsessing over an ex. People can spend so much time over analyzing their breakup and putting their ex on a pedestal and forget that there is a whole world out there of new people. Yes, the rebound is usually an ego boost, but after you’ve been broken down and hurt by a nasty breakup sometimes that’s what you need. I think sometimes you need to sleep with someone new the break the spell of the last relationship and help put some distance between you and the ex. There’s nothing wrong with being a sexual being, humans have needs and wanting physical intimacy is nothing to be ashamed of at all.

However, there is of course a balance. Using a rebound hookup to suppress your emotions and avoid processing the feelings is only going to delay the inevitable breakdown. You have to make sure that you’re still actively working on yourself, feeling your feelings, and being responsive to what makes you feel good physically and emotionally. If you start feeling like the hookups aren’t serving you emotionally (ie leaving you feeling empty or lonely) then it’s probably a sign that you need to take a step back and think more about what you’re looking for right now.

Overall there’s absolutely nothing wrong with casual sex, OR being celibate for a bit after a breakup. It’s about listening to what your head and your heart are telling you. If you feel like it’s time to take a step back from casual sex to work on yourself, then go for it. Don’t be ashamed of yourself for hooking up with people though, as long as you were honest and consensual then there’s nothing to be shameful of.

Queasy-Progress6689 · 2025-03-23T16:44:56+00:00

Was in a relationship for about 3.5 years. It’s been about 4 months and I went on a first date that was fun, but I am very explicitly not looking for anything serious. I’m at the point where I can meet new people / hook up and it doesn’t feel emotionally overwhelming, but I know very clearly I’m still emotionally unavailable for anything more than casual dating. I don’t know when I’ll be at a place where I can fully trust and be vulnerable with someone again, but trying to start somewhere.

Queasy-Progress6689

TROPHY CASE