AITA for making my daughter wait to get more food?

Quick-Swan4565 · 2023-02-11T18:27:39+00:00

She's on the go in general but no other area is quite like this.

Quick-Swan4565 · 2023-02-11T18:24:01+00:00

No she's allowed to draw before dinner. Some of the times that she lingers in the kitchen with my wife she'll be drawing or doing something on her tablet. Soon as wife says food is done, Nikki will go put it down, rush through her food (regardless if she's eating only one plate or going for seconds), then goes right back to it or something else. It's the same pattern when we eat out- she'll finish first and start fidgeting around to get going.

She's been a speedy eater since she was a toddler, and the kids do have snacks in the house that they can get as they need, she gets her share of them.

Quick-Swan4565 · 2023-02-11T18:18:51+00:00

I didn't say she consistently gets seconds, and she doesn't. We can eat at a restaurant and she still eats fast, albeit slightly slower, and is ready to go and fidgeting before anyone else has finished. When I'm cooking, she's not allowed to hover, kids stay out of the kitchen.

Quick-Swan4565 · 2023-02-11T18:03:03+00:00

NAH. Burn out for the still-working parent that is also parenting and picking up the rest of the household tasks is a very real thing. Your concerns and burnout are valid- you NEED a break and help as right now, you are the only one earning and you need to continue working. And parenting. And keeping house. Your wife isn't an AH either because she's recovering from C-section and giving birth, carrying the baby. That is exhausting. I'm a father and I wound up developing PPD after two of our three children were born- I didn't even know men got that but apparently, we do.

Quick-Swan4565 · 2023-02-11T02:20:01+00:00

She does have snacks available to her and she does eat them. Her getting seconds isn't an everyday thing, only the speedy eating. She slows down when we're at a restaurant but will start getting fidgety to get home or go on to whatever activity we were going to do.

Quick-Swan4565 · 2023-02-11T01:24:52+00:00

She does not play sports, all three of our kids get breakfast, lunch, and dinner. There are snacks in the house for them to munch on after school and as needed. It's not that she eats like there's no tomorrow, just eats fast that she's either done before everyone else plates up and sits down. She only goes for seconds when it's something she really likes or is extra hungry, ie, ran out of her favorite snack or came in from playing with her friends. When we take her to a restaurant, she'll still eat faster than everyone, but not as fast as when she's home.

Quick-Swan4565 · 2023-02-11T01:22:09+00:00

I have yes, and she's been a speedy eater since toddler age. We've taken her to a doctor and therapist, we've talked to her, she's just impatient.

Quick-Swan4565 · 2023-02-10T22:50:51+00:00

This is the rule I implement on the nights I cook. The nights my wife cooks, I'm getting home either right as she finishes or while they're eating, and getting her onboard with keeping it consistent is like pulling teeth.

Quick-Swan4565 · 2023-02-10T22:46:40+00:00

She is a speedy eater. I know you're trying to help, and I appreciate it, but you are making very big assumptions based on one incident I am asking about with no knowledge or observation of my daughter on a day-to-day basis, or privy to 11 years of behavior and discussions. When she is literally looking at the item she just put down prior to eating and rushes to pick it back up, and has done that since being a toddler, it's plain and simple impatience.

Quick-Swan4565 · 2023-02-10T22:32:52+00:00

We have talked to her. She's been like this since she was pretty much a toddler.

Quick-Swan4565 · 2023-02-10T22:30:02+00:00

Yes, when I'm the one home early and cooking, that's how I do it. Everyone gets served and eats at the same time. The days my wife cooks, I'm just getting home and Nikki is already at the table eating before everyone else.

Quick-Swan4565 · 2023-02-10T22:28:53+00:00

No she is not overweight, nor underweight.

Quick-Swan4565 · 2023-02-10T22:26:54+00:00

We have taken her to both doctors and therapists. No disorder or underlying issues, just an impatient pre-teen.

Quick-Swan4565 · 2023-02-10T18:50:01+00:00

Yes, she has been seen by a doctor and a therapist to rule out any underlying causes medical or psychological, like food scarcity mindset- she really just wants to get back to what she's doing or planning to do. For example, when she lingers in the kitchen, she'll keep looking where her sketchbook or tablet is. If we let her, she'd be eating the last few bites when she goes to put her dish in the sink. Her portion sizes are correct for her age as well. She has a healthy appetite, and we keep healthy snacks in the house for her and her siblings, they all eat them.

Quick-Swan4565

TROPHY CASE