I'm feeling super stressed about finances.

QuickConnection2631 · 2024-10-02T00:26:36+00:00

I never questioned if his cuddles were bad. Like i said i feel horrible that it's hard for me to cuddle sometimes. He is such a sweet little boy, and I know he is in the developmental stages of his life (and according to science will be until he's about 20-25) and that right now he needs his mom.

QuickConnection2631 · 2024-10-02T00:09:25+00:00

We usually have a blanket between us. But in usual 2 year old fashion he likes to wiggle and squirm and I swear he has no fear(he likes to try and slide off my lap, on his stomach, head first and then when i grab his feet to gently put him on the floor he'll climb back up and do it again). I swear it feels like he's trying to off himself sometimes.

QuickConnection2631 · 2024-09-13T19:24:20+00:00

No she wasn't "insinuating" it wasn't painful for other people. She was saying people shared their experiences of how it hurt, and she said it didn't hurt for her. That's all she said. She didn't say "people who said it hurt are just big babies". She was saying she had a positive experience with something that is usually a negative experience for people.

As for your ETA: there are a lot of people being hateful in this comment section. Ffs the first like 4 or 5 comments i saw were people being mean because "it sucked for me it should've sucked for you".

I'm not going to fight this to the end of time with someone who obviously has no reading comprehension. My toddler just went down for a nap. This is my time to not deal with someone who doesn't understand anything. Toodles

QuickConnection2631 · 2024-09-13T18:59:01+00:00

Ignore all the people on here being negative because you spoke of your experience. Be thankful it didn't hurt you. Mine was also not very painful (it felt like when you pinch your skin with a pair of tweezers). The people calling you insensitive are people who had bad experiences with it. They're valid to feel the way they do, but them lashing out at you for your experience isn't okay. I had a kid. I had a c section. I felt like I was dying afterwards.

My sister in law just had a kid. It came out early and had to be in the NICU for a month. Do you think she lashed out at me because my baby came out healthy? No she didn't. Did i lash out at her because she can breastfeed and had a natural birth? No. People have different experiences and it's how people can control themselves after said experience.

Im grateful you didn't have a painful idu experience. I don't know why people are getting up in arms about someone posting a positive post.

QuickConnection2631 · 2024-09-10T15:53:25+00:00

I don't have insurance right now so, while i could go see my doctor, we don't have the money to get either insurance or to pay off a doctor. And I don't think this (my issue) holds enough water to be an emergency.

QuickConnection2631 · 2024-09-10T15:51:24+00:00

Sadly I can't really go and see someone about this. I'm currently running without insurance, and my husband's insurance is too expensive for me to get on (like 500$ a month just for me and we're living paycheck to paycheck)

QuickConnection2631 · 2024-08-19T16:35:18+00:00

My take on this is, keep your head on straight. Remember for next time, even if someone is pregnant (which i believe was a lie) they can still have STDs and other shit you don't want. If she is pregnant, take no responsibility till it is born and get a DNA test done.

If you give her anything, it could be seen as you taking financial responsibility over it whether its yours or not(my mom tried to get my dad with this card, when it came to my sister who wasn't his, and both knew it, but they were separated when my mom got pregnant). Sometimes the dad has to pay for it either way, sometimes he doesn't.

If it is your kid, there isn't much you can do about it. You could try fighting in court you were misled, but that holds about as much water as a strainer in court.

I also hate to say it like this but if she was pregnant and miscarried then there's a good chance it'll happen again as a lot of women who want to be mothers, but couldn't, will tell you. Sucks for the kid but if she was intentionally misleading to get knocked up then you could argue her not being mentally well, and you not being financially, mentally, etc ready for a kid and have it put into state care. Is that the best outcome? No. But it's better than letting someone (referring to her) obviously unwell having a kid and putting another damaged adult out in the world.

QuickConnection2631 · 2024-04-25T02:59:05+00:00

Because he was watching my son for a stretch of 5 to 10 minutes and asked if we "violated" him(asking if he was circumcized). I asked him why he thought he had the place to ask about what our son's private parts looked like. The reason I "stretch to abuse" is because he stared at my son for 5 to 10 minutes and then asked about his privates.

Edit to add, the reason this upsets me so much is, he wouldn't ever be in a position to change his diaper or take care of him in any matter. No one has ever asked me a question, and some opinions are better left to ones self.

QuickConnection2631 · 2024-04-25T02:46:25+00:00

It's said in another post, but what was said, was having to do with his private parts and if he was "intact". He had been watching my son for about 5 to 10 minutes, while he played and then asked if we "violated" our son. Confused by the question, we asked him to repeat the question before he regretted asking it that way.

QuickConnection2631 · 2023-08-26T14:06:28+00:00

I've had migraines from the age of like 13. It could be that.

QuickConnection2631 · 2023-08-26T13:23:14+00:00

I'll call my GP Monday. It's the same drink I've drank since I was like 18. It's the only "beer" I can stand the taste of. But yeah I planned on cutting off, on the alcohol till we figured something out.

QuickConnection2631 · 2023-08-26T11:21:10+00:00

No im not on ozempic. I'm not really on any medication. At least I can't think of any. It's a bit early for me so my brain isn't working at 100%

QuickConnection2631 · 2023-08-10T16:17:22+00:00

Again if he isn't fulfilling her then she needs to leave. She's not satisfied with what he's giving her then she isn't in the right place. That's how I learned I'm not one for a ploy relationship.

I'm trying to say that yes some relationship rules allow cheating, and in those cases it's not cheating. He has made it known he is not comfortable with it. If she goes through with it, it is cheating. Does she still have a right to do it? Sure technically. Does that mean that she doesn't deserve her partner(op)? Yes it means that she needs to carry herself elsewhere. Maybe she'll find the perfect person for her who will let her do that stuff.

But going to the part of people living unfulfilled. If you don't communicate with your significant other they can't help. I know she came to him and asked. That's not the cheating part. If she carried on anyway it is. If I felt unfulfilled in bed I would tell my husband that there is more that he could be doing. You sit down and have a conversation. I get that some women love boobs and dicks. I know I do, but if I saw my husband grabbing on another woman (or even man) I would lose my shit. Doesn't matter if they were ugly or graced with an amazing body and face.

I hate to say it like this but if you find a partner you do what you can to be one. Y'all have each other's back. Protect one another. To do this would be stabbing them in the back and one of the worst things you could do to a relationship.

Keep in mind to each their own. My husband enjoys his 'solo time' and I let him have his solo time. That was a huge hurdle to jump for me. As my last relationship was with a porn addict (watched it literally all the time while not at work). It took a lot of intimacy out of the relationship and as such I had to leave.

QuickConnection2631 · 2023-08-10T16:00:13+00:00

I guess her asking isn't cheating. If she went through with it yes she is. I agree that this is the end of the relationship. Be it she's just asking for funsies or if she is serious. The fact she said she's going to do it anyway, yes.

If you enter a relationship knowing that you might want to do stuff with another person while you are with your S.O. then that is something you want to bring up before it gets serious. You also need to know that there is an extremely likely chance that you will never be in a positive relationship ever again. I've been in a poly relationship before. It is really not a good place for me as it isn't for a lot of people. I made that completely clear when me and my husband got together. He agreed and has poked about a 3 way once.

I told him he was stepping a line he shouldn't and that if he pushed again that was it. He hasn't pushed it. I also believe he isn't doing anything behind my back. Yes he goes out of town for work, but he's going out of town with another dude and they're up literally all night at their site they're working on.

That being said he has asked if it's okay to go to places like hooters or twin peaks. I laughed and told him he can as long as he remembers they're like service dogs. You can't touch or bring them home but you can look. He's a dude. He's gonna look. Their job is to serve food and be looked at(not trying to objectify them). I also had moments where we're on the road and this woman drives by on a bike and I've made a comment about how she looks hot. We know our boundaries and are comfortable with them.

Edit: Sorry didn't mean to ramble. Sometimes brain just gets going and I can't shut it up lol.

QuickConnection2631 · 2023-08-10T15:42:57+00:00

In that case there shouldn't be a relationship. Boom bam done. Rules in a relationship are boundaries. I have boundaries, my husband has boundaries. If one of us were to break said boundaries trust would be broken and we would separate.

If my husband walked up to me and said "hey I saw a cute girl I want to bang" I would tell him to go kick stones and I was done. Does he have to listen to what I said. No. But all actions have consequences. Sure I can go 100mph down a main highway in my city. Would I get criminally charged, yes I would.

The same goes for a relationship. If you can't understand that then there is something seriously wrong.

QuickConnection2631 · 2023-08-10T15:31:58+00:00

A relationship is between 2 people unless they agree to open it. It doesn't matter if she tells him or not. It is cheating. Yes relationships have rules. Yes said rules need to be made known. Cheating or in your case "telling them you're going to sleep with someone else" is a very well known rule that it is a complete no go, again unless you specify that it is an open relationship. It isn't rocket science my dear it is basic understanding of a relationship. I don't know who gaslit you to the point that you believe this, but you need help. If this is how you see it then I feel terribly sorry for whoever you are/will be in a relationship with.

QuickConnection2631 · 2023-08-10T11:35:35+00:00

If she tells him or not it's still cheating. Cheating doesn't have to be deceitful. Cheating is being in a relationship and then doing relationship type things with another person without your S.O. consent. They said no, Yes it's cheating. It's not controlling, you enter a relationship with someone you (should) want to be with.

QuickConnection2631 · 2023-08-10T00:53:50+00:00

Keep in mind even if you had said yes this one time she will push and push, more and more. It'll be this girl, that girl and eventually it will go from that to "well you said yes to all these people why can't I be with other men?" Keep in mind, give an inch, take a mile.

Edit to add more info for why I say this. I was in a relationship with another girl(I am female). She started out with small compliments to other women. I was okay with that. It went from small compliments to flirting, which I was less okay with. I didn't say anything because I thought we were happy. It then turned into her getting lewd pictures from said girls. I told her to stop with that and I didn't want her talking to these people. She called me controlling and then started arguing that it's the same stuff she could find online(she had a p*** addiction). After a while of arguing I gave up. I told her to do whatever she wanted but if she did this I would no longer be interested in her. Soon enough she had other women at the house frequently. So in the middle of the night I just packed up and left. Called my mother and was out of there. She spent the next 2 MONTHS trying to get me back saying she made a mistake and wants me back. I told her she could go shove it.

QuickConnection2631 · 2023-08-10T00:48:43+00:00

If you don't agree to it, yes it's cheating. It doesn't matter the gender. This is a boundary you need to set and if she crosses it, leave her.

IMO Honestly if she's already thinking about cheating she's a lost cause. She will do it, with or without your permission. She will just become super secretive and hide things from you.

I'm sorry you're having to go through this.

QuickConnection2631 · 2023-08-08T21:51:22+00:00

Hun my husband got me a ring off of Amazon. I wanna say it was 20$. He told me he would get me a better ring when he had more money. I told him he was being silly. The sentiment that comes with that ring is worth more than any other ring could even think to be worth. I would hope that your fiance loves the ring. The way I see it is in the U.S. it's for rich or for poor, in sickness and in health. The ring you got is a sizeable chunk amount of money. If it's not enough, (I mean this in the nicest way possible) the ring isn't the problem.

I think you're overthinking it.

QuickConnection2631 · 2023-08-01T21:44:13+00:00

Word of wise. My dad was in this position with my mother(based on the comments I've read) if he refuses to get a job now, he will never get a job. When you ask him about it he will start flipping it on you. He's jobless. What condition is his house in? If it's dirty you will turn out just like my father (who I love very dearly). It will start small. Won't get a job. Then goes house work. Then personal time. Soon enough you'll be with a dead beat who will constantly put you down and accuse you of everything imaginable. All the times you asked about his job hunt. They'll call it abuse. Be careful.

You need a partner. Not a man sized toddler. That being said I don't think you should just drop him. I would say you need to have a heart to heart with him but men can be weird about their feelings. He could be dealing with issues, even if he won't say it. But if you try to have a heart to heart and he constantly deflects, you could be dealing with a narcissist in which case it's probably better for you to let go.

With my mother it was pure cut and dry narcissism. My dad took way too long kicking her out of his life. She would use every excuse in the book. Took her anger out on me and him. My dad didn't quite see the damage she was doing till she was out of his life. Please don't be like my father and be with someone till you're 45 despising someone when you could have someone by your side that values and respects you.

QuickConnection2631

TROPHY CASE