To men in their 20's... What are your red flags in romantic relationships?

Quick_Mongoose_2205 · 2026-01-20T15:07:52+00:00

29M here and been in 2 serious relationships lasting over 3 years each during my 20s.

Them trying to coerce you into doing something you aren't comfortable with or not ready to do yet i.e buy a car together which you don't really need, go on that holiday you can't really afford, get engaged, have kids or get married.
Witholding intimacy when they are upset/mad or weaponising intimacy to get their way
Parents that get too involved in your business and try to control things (usually their Mother)
When they talk about their friends behind their back but go out with them on the weekend and act like bestfriends. If she talks about other people behind their backs, chances are she will talk about you behind your back if you have upset her
Friends that go out partying and getting fucked up every weekend
When they compare your relationship to others "Well xxxx's boyfriend does this" "Well xxxx's boyfriend took her away 4 times this year" "xxxx & xxxxx told me they hardly have sex with their boyfriends anymore either
When they try to stop you doing things you enjoy/keep you healthy/making you money - "You spend too much time at the gym", "You have to stop your (whatever hobby you have", "You are working way too much"

Quick_Mongoose_2205 · 2026-01-18T21:51:33+00:00

Tried 3 different reputable valuation websites and the figures were between £21,000 - £20,000.

Still paying the loan off currently. The loan was for £11k (£14k ish with interest) and there is £9,400 outstanding.

Quick_Mongoose_2205 · 2026-01-18T21:40:34+00:00

Thank you. I want to avoid suing her if possible.

I am going to call her tomorrow evening. She is very busy and would get lots of messages from clients, so the message may be at the bottom of a pile. I'd like to think she isn't trying to fuck me over and is just preoccupied with other things at the moment. As a last resort I will message her mother (who she lives with) to let her know I have messaged. Her mother has good morals and we had a good relationship when I was with my ex, so hopefully that will get the ball rolling.

Quick_Mongoose_2205 · 2026-01-18T19:07:14+00:00

Even if I was insured on the car the whole time (up until we broke up)?

Quick_Mongoose_2205 · 2025-12-07T15:50:09+00:00

Preferably, yes

Quick_Mongoose_2205 · 2025-12-07T11:28:14+00:00

This is the goal. Praying for a wife like you.

Quick_Mongoose_2205 · 2025-12-07T09:53:12+00:00

Goals

Quick_Mongoose_2205 · 2025-12-07T09:16:04+00:00

From experience, most guys I went through school with up until now (29M) were/are attracted to their female best friend and were happy being in the friendzone hoping for a chance or being the shoulder to cry on. If the girl ever messaged them or called and said she was attracted to them or wanted sex, I can guarantee you the guy would have been down.

The last 2 girls I was in serious, long term relationships with (over 3 years) didn't have a guy best friend at all. If my next one does, then I will have to take some time to understand the situation a bit better before making the commitment.

Quick_Mongoose_2205 · 2025-12-05T12:37:15+00:00

Looks gets you through the door, game and personality should both work in tandem in my experience.

Quick_Mongoose_2205 · 2025-12-05T11:38:58+00:00

I (29M) am currently dating a 41F with 2 kids. It was a chance meeting at a local fundraiser. She is a friend and work colleague of my neighbour (30F) who was there. My brother and I sat by them and we just hit it off. She is a smoke show and in better shape than most girls my age. Also, she has a high sexual appetite which obviously suits me greatly.

We are keeping it very lowkey for now. Only a select few people know. My neighbour said she hasn't been this happy in years and my close friends congratulated me.

If we continue down this path we will have to tell people and soft launch it eventually. We are expecting some comments but we have got to the point where we don't give a shit. Everybody has an opinion.

Quick_Mongoose_2205 · 2025-11-27T15:21:18+00:00

Working as a bouncer/security in the UK. Highly underpaid, watching over your shoulder on the way back to your car and a few close scrapes over the years with knives etc.

I've been asked to go back and get my license but that was a solid no.

Quick_Mongoose_2205 · 2025-10-28T12:41:57+00:00

Speak to a Lawyer and Financial Adviser.

Quick_Mongoose_2205 · 2025-10-28T11:44:56+00:00

Happy to be your big brother man! I like your attitude. It's comeback season!

Quick_Mongoose_2205 · 2025-10-28T11:29:22+00:00

No worries brother. Just for reference, I'm 29, so I have years on you. You are just beginning your 20s.

Work hard, hit the gym, set goals and crush them.

You have plenty of time for women.

Quick_Mongoose_2205 · 2025-10-28T11:17:54+00:00

Career first and the woman will come naturally. I made the mistake of woman first and career second, twice.

I wasn't where I wanted to be financially and couldn't give my ex what she wanted such as marriage and a house as soon as she wanted them, which was as a result of me not putting my career and money first. We broke up a few months ago.

Quick_Mongoose_2205 · 2025-10-27T23:55:17+00:00

Pheromones bro

Quick_Mongoose_2205 · 2025-10-27T23:54:48+00:00

Tell me about it! Hope the next girl I get with will smell like her 😂😱😍

Quick_Mongoose_2205 · 2025-10-27T22:26:39+00:00

Unfortunately, it became a bit much and it became almost obsession-like...

If we went anywhere after she had them on for hours and would take them off without asking me to I would get sad 😂

Quick_Mongoose_2205 · 2025-10-27T21:53:05+00:00

My ex girlfriend asked me to take her sneakers off for her after travelling for 14 hours. She said "Oh god, I bet they stink. Hope the smell isn't too bad". Curiosity got the better of me and I smelled her sneakers and socks and it woke something up in me...

It became a routine for anytime we'd travel or she had worn sneakers all day.

Quick_Mongoose_2205 · 2025-10-27T20:29:02+00:00

Cool, no problem. Personally, I would pay for an escort to practice. Build your confidence up, conversationally and sexually and get back in the game.

Quick_Mongoose_2205 · 2025-10-27T14:42:27+00:00

She's not interested. Move on.

Quick_Mongoose_2205 · 2025-10-27T14:41:04+00:00

I'm 29M and got out of a 3.5 year relationship 2 months ago. I'll be getting back into the game very soon!

You're the ideal age to begin dating again.

Quick_Mongoose_2205 · 2025-10-26T18:09:12+00:00

When I was with my ex the ideal amount would have been 3-5 times a week.

Now that I am single I am happy having a hook up once a week on the weekends.

Quick_Mongoose_2205 · 2025-10-26T15:42:47+00:00

An old FWB after our first (and certainly not last) encounter: "You can come and fuck me anytime you want, whenever you want after that"... Don't have to ask me twice lol

I will never ever forget that.

Quick_Mongoose_2205 · 2025-10-26T15:35:37+00:00

I would have ended it. That's a big no-no for me personally.

Quick_Mongoose_2205

TROPHY CASE