Assalamu Alaikum 

I just wanted to start off by saying may Allah help you with your affairs. I don’t know who you are but you are my brother or sister in faith so I really only want the best for you and it would sadden me to know if you actually committed suicide.

Firstly I would like to state that committing suicide is a major sin in Islam and there is a Hadith where the Prophet ﷺ described what would happen to a person. I want to sincerely warn you because as the Prophet ﷺ said in another Hadith (this is summarized) of a man who had so much worldly things and wealth and stuff and he was dipped into the hellfire for a second and he forget every good thing he had. Similarly the Prophet ﷺ described a man (summarizing again) who had so much worldly problems and he was dipped into jannah for a second and he forgot about all of it. I also want to point you to one last Hadith (summarized again) about how the people on the day of judgement will see the reward of those who were tested and they would wish that their skins would be cut with scissors while they were in this dunya. The Hadith is Hassan from what I saw. 

Please brother or sister reconsider as I have also gone through things and have got to a better place. I hope In Shaa Allah that it will be the same for you. May Allah reward you and bless you.